All of You: A MC Biker Romance
Author: Harper, Callie
Date: 2017-05-20T07:00:00+00:00
Keywords: ident; done11; Romance; JeanneP
Description: Night after night, Jax pictures her coming to him. In his dreams, Sky appears in the darkness, ready and wanting. But the night that finally happens, he finds out they’re in the middle of a nightmare. Sky has nowhere to turn. Only one man can keep her safe, but he’s the most dangerous of them all. Her only choice is to put herself in Jax’s hands. Even if it destroys them both. Note: “All of You” is a standalone hot contemporary romance. It’s one of four “All In” novels, which can be read in any order, with some crossover characters.
Rights: Copyright 2017 Callie Harper. All rights reserved.

All of You

Jax & Sky

Callie Harper

Callie Harper Books

Contents

All of You

Copyright

Callie Harper’s Books

1.
Sky

2.
Jax

3.
Sky

4.
Jax

5.
Sky

6.
Jax

7.
Sky

8.
Jax

9.
Sky

10.
Jax

11.
Sky

12.
Jax

13.
Sky

14.
Jax

15.
Sky

16.
Jax

17.
Sky

18.
Jax

19.
Sky

Epilogue—Jax

Epilogue—Sky

THE END

Thank you!

Contact

About the Author

Acknowledgments

All of You

(Jax & Sky)

By Callie Harper

Copyright

Copyright 2017 Callie Harper

Cover Design by Perfect Pear Creative

All rights reserved. This book is a work of fiction. Any similarity to real events, people, or places is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced or distributed in any format without the permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations used for review. If you have not purchased this book or received a copy from the author, you are reading a pirated book.

The author acknowledges the trademarked status of products referred to in this book and acknowledges that trademarks have been used without permission.

This book contains mature content, including graphic sex. Please do not continue reading if you are under the age of 18 or if this type of content is disturbing to you.

Callie Harper’s Books

All In Novels

In Deep (Chase & Emma)

All of Me (Liam & Sophie)

All of You (Jax & Sky)

All I Need (Liam & Annie), coming July 2017

Beg For It Novels

Unleashed (Declan & Kara)

Undone (Ash & Ana)

Untamed (Heath & Violet)

Unbelievable (Colt & Caroline)

Undeniable (Dom & Gigi)

Unwrapped ( Jack & Hannah)

1

Sky

The second I walked into the dining hall, I knew he was there. As I made my way around, stopping to chat and smile with all the residents, I could sense his presence. I resisted looking over, but still I flushed with an electric thrill.

I took my time, asking after people’s days, talking about their pets. They were allowed to have small cats and dogs at the Cavallo Canyon Retirement Community, and those little guys got spoiled. Sometimes I brought in treats and toys for them, making the animals and their owners happy. As a nurse’s aide, plenty of things kept me busy, but brightening up peoples’ days made it all worthwhile.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed him stand. I couldn’t help but watch him move. With his huge, muscular body, he had all the edge of a motorcycle bad boy straight out of my fantasies. And what was he doing? He was helping Mrs. DeMarco. She’d come to the dining hall without her walker and needed assistance. Slower than a snail’s pace, hand to her elbow, Jax ushered her to a chair. Be still my beating heart.

I’d figured I might see him today. Over the past year, since his grandfather, Ace, had moved in, Jax usually visited every Monday. Not that I was paying attention. OK, I was paying attention. But I shouldn’t be paying that much attention. I was married.

“There’s my girl!” Ace called out. I turned and smiled, making my way to his table. “I was wondering when I was going to get to see you today.” Ace rose from his chair, as a gentleman always stands to greet a lady. He’d explained that to me more than once.

But it didn’t stop me from trying to get him to sit back down again. “Ace! Don’t you get up on my account.” I tried to shoo him back into his seat.

“You look gorgeous today, as always.” He was such a flatterer. I wore my schlumpy scrubs as usual. But Ace sported a tweed hat, the kind of flat cap with a brim I could picture men wearing in an Irish pub.

“You’re rocking that hat.” I tapped the brim and gave him a thumbs up.

“You want to try it on?” He offered it to me with a twinkle in his eye. I laughed and shook my head no.

“Hey, Sky.” As he rejoined the table, Jax’s voice rolled out, deep and sexy.

I cleared my throat. “Hi.” I didn’t meet his eyes. I knew it was adolescent, but I couldn’t help myself. The way he said my name, even in the middle of the dining hall with his grandfather standing right there, somehow he made it sound like it was late at night and just the two of us.

“You know what today is?” Ace sounded like he had a big, exciting secret.

“January 23rd?” I smiled at him, knowing he liked it when I was a little bit sassy.

“Smarty-pants. Yes, it is, which just happens to be my one year anniversary here.”

“Congratulations.” I actually had known that already. He’d told me last week, and what was more I had a surprise for him waiting in the staff room. But I didn’t want to ruin it by seeming like I had anything planned.

“I did not want to move here, let me tell you.” He went on to repeat what he’d explained several times before, and what I’d heard from so many residents. No one wanted to lose their independence. But then, once they were at Cavallo Canyon, they realized it wasn’t such a bad place.

“It’s because of my grandson that I’m here, you know. Jax. You’ve met him before.” I nodded, cursing the ridiculous blush that flamed my cheeks. Yes, I’d met Hercules.

“How you doing today?” Jax asked me with heavy-lidded eyes and a slow smile.

“Mmph.” All that sparkling chitchat I’d managed with the rest of the people in the dining hall? Gone. I flushed. I stammered. It was completely absurd, especially given the fact that Jax never said or did anything inappropriate. No matter how much I thought about it.

“He’s all right, this one.” Ace bragged on his grandson. “This kid didn’t grow up with a silver spoon, let me tell you. But he turned out good as gold.”

“O.K., Ace.” Jax chuckled good-naturedly, rubbing his hand over his closely-cropped head. I wanted to do that myself, feel the rough stubble of his hair, the smooth nape of his neck, the broad slope of his shoulders.

“Kid, I got an idea for you.” Morty ambled over to us in his signature plaid jacket. I wondered if any stores sold sportcoats like that anymore. Hipsters would probably fight themselves in a mosh pit over it.

“Hey, Morty.” Jax offered his father’s friend a chair, but he waved it off.

“Got an idea for your bar.” Jax owned a place downtown, Ace Bar and Grill. I’d been there once, with my husband Mike when I’d first moved to Cavallo. Back then, Mike had taken me out all over town, introducing me to every brother in his motorcycle club, the Sacrificial Skulls. That was when we used to go out a lot together. Not so much anymore.

I didn’t think Jax remembered our having met back then, though. He never mentioned it. Just like he never mentioned Mike.

“We watched a movie last night,” Morty continued. “Have you seen it? School for the Old.”

“Don’t think I’ve heard of that.” Jax shook his head.

“I think you mean Old School.” I stifled a laugh. Ace had recommended it for movie night. It had been a big hit.

“Yeah, I’ve seen Old School.” Now Jax was smiling, too. Law enforcement officers might need to think about making that illegal. “Ma’am, why were you driving 90 in a 30 mile-an-hour zone?” “I was remembering how Jax looked when he smiled.” They’d have to let me go without a ticket.

“So here’s what you do at your bar. There was a scene about it in the movie.” Morty pointed again at Jax for emphasis. “KY wrestling.” I was glad I wasn’t drinking anything or I might have spit it out. Jax’s place wasn’t exactly an upscale wine bar, but KY wrestling would take it to a whole new level.

“That’s the ticket,” Morty insisted.

“I’ll give it some thought.” Jax answered him, but glanced at me, one eyebrow raised, clearly also fighting a laugh.

“Say, you got anything for me today?” Ace looked at me expectantly.

“I might.” I placed my finger to my lips, signaling to him to keep the secret.

“Excellent!” He clapped his hands together and started licking his chops. So, my surprise for him might not be that much of a surprise. But I couldn’t tell him no when he asked me so directly.

I liked to bake pies. Fruit pies, mostly, though I thought about expanding into savory pies, too. But apple, cherry, blueberry, strawberry, those were my mainstays. I’d gotten into it as a teenager, my version of defiance. When your parents were the ones out partying, as a teen you rebelled by staying home and baking. At least I had.

I baked for fun, but Romi’s Diner, a local mom-and-pop place, had started buying pies from me, as many as I could make, whenever I could make them. If I had more time, or access to a larger kitchen, I thought maybe I could grow it into a business. Maybe even open my own shop one day. But for now, I contented myself with the small-scale, experimenting with new recipes whenever I could.

“Let me go check and see if the coast is clear. I have to do my rounds, but I’ll see if I can bring it up to your room later.” I winked at Ace, exaggerating the stealthy creep of my movements toward the hallway.

Sweets weren’t exactly verboten in the retirement community, but they were seriously frowned upon by some of the stricter nurses and doctors. I understood the harm of sugar, especially for diabetic residents, but I also understood the joy that my pies could bring. And from my perspective, there was SUGARTM and there was sugar. Candy bars manufactured in some factory that would survive a nuclear holocaust did not belong in the same category as my homemade pies. Yes, I baked with sugar, but I also used real ingredients and a whole lot of love. That had to make a difference.

My wrist ached. Stepping out into the hallway, I snuck a moment to gently massage it. Pushing back my sleeve, I could see bruising, angry purple and blackish-blue. Dang it. I was so pale I’d have to wear long sleeves for the next two weeks. It was late January, but that didn’t mean much in Southern California. Where I lived, people ran around in tank tops all year round. Unless they were trying to hide bruises.

“Hey, girl!” My friend and fellow nurses’ aide Maria rounded the corner, smiling at me. Quickly, I dropped my hand, sleeve down again, but not before she’d noticed. Scowling now, she shook her head. “Why you with that Pendejo?”

I laughed as if she’d made a joke. We both knew she wasn’t kidding. I also couldn’t pretend like I didn’t know what she was talking about. I didn’t speak Spanish, but I’d grown up with and now worked with enough Mexicans to know all the best swear words. And I knew exactly who she thought was a jerk idiot: my husband.

“I haven’t gotten to Carl yet.” I pointed down three doors to his room. “But he needs his meds if you’re heading that way.” See how skillful I could be with a subject change?

She glanced down again at my wrist, all covered up. Then she looked straight into my eyes. “You know you’re better than this, right?”

“I’m fine. Are you—?” I gestured again at Carl’s room.

“Yeah, I got it.” She exhaled heavily, disappointed in me. Then she headed away.

I walked in the opposite direction, relieved, upset, confused and indignant all at once. Maria meant well, I knew that. She’d been in an abusive marriage at my age. One day last summer, she’d told me everything. Her ex had beaten her so bad she had permanent hearing loss in her left ear. The night he’d smacked around their four-year-old son had been the last straw. She’d packed her and her son up and filed for a restraining order and a divorce all in one. She’d moved back in with her mom and never looked back.

That wasn’t my situation, though. Sure, my husband Mike was a rough and tough guy, but he wasn’t that bad. He was a big brute, but you could say that about any of the Skulls. When I’d first met him at 21, I’d been star-struck. He’d shown up at a county fair near my hometown outside Bakersfield. I’d been there with my friends, kicking around, bored. He’d ridden up on his chopper, looking so badass, talking about how he lived down in L.A., telling me I looked so pretty I should be a movie star. He told me everyone called him Griller because he was so good at getting people’s secrets. If he grilled a guy, the poor SOB didn’t stand a chance.

When he’d asked if I wanted to ride off on his chopper with him to Vegas, how could I have answered anything other than “hell yeah!” What did I have going for me back in my sleepy, rundown hometown? Nothing. What did he offer? I couldn’t wait to find out.

Three years later, there I was, with one of my co-workers implying that my husband abused me. Personally, I thought that description went too far. Mike got physical from time to time, especially if he’d been drinking, but he had almost a hundred pounds on me. It didn’t take much to leave a mark. And he always felt bad about it afterwards, telling me how much he loved me, how he never meant to hurt me. Sometimes he even cried he felt so bad. Would a truly bad guy do that?

I grabbed an extra blanket from the supply cabinet and brought it to Mrs. Grover in room nine. She was always complaining of being cold. She had mountains of blankets and throw pillows, but her dementia left her feeling like she was in a bare hospital room. I’d learned over time that one of the few things that made her smile was me walking in holding a blanket.

“Finally, someone’s listening to me!” She welcomed me with relief as I tucked the blanket around her in her chair, telling her about the sunshine outside and my bus ride that morning and any other silly thing I could think of to connect her to the reality of day-to-day life. Then I folded up the extra blanket I’d brought her the last time I’d visited and took it with me when I left.

Smiling, tidying, helping a man do some physical therapy, fixing a woman’s hair so she’d look pretty for her daughter’s visit, I bustled around, never stopping for a moment. I honestly loved my job. I’d never felt so useful, so appreciated. Some of the residents were cranky, of course, but I had to empathize. They were in pain. They were lonely. I was only 24, and pain and loneliness made me cranky, too.

Finally catching a moment, I retrieved my pie from the staff room. As I headed over to Ace’s, I told myself I wasn’t wondering if Jax would still be visiting. But I was.

“There’s my girl!” Ace welcomed me after my knock.

“Don’t get up.” I tried, to no avail. He had a buttery-soft leather reclining armchair and if he was in his room he was almost certain to be in it, positioned so he could keep one eye on the TV and the other on the sliding glass door to his front patio and the community courtyard. But both he and Jax stood as I entered. The two of them made quite a pair, Ace with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes and Jax, six-foot-three inches of dark, magnetic sin. I could see some resemblance in their faces, but Jax stood a full head taller and had to have at least 80 extra pounds of muscle.

“Hey there.” I set the pie down on the counter, wishing I could control my leaping, skittering pulse. Anyone paying attention might think I was about to go into cardiac arrest.

“Let’s take a look.” Ace puttered over, rubbing his hands together like a little kid as I took the pie out of the bag. “Apple!”

“Your favorite, right?” I smiled at his reaction. That was what I loved most about baking pies, how happy they made people.

“You remembered.”

“You made Ace a pie?” Jax started over to us in that slow, controlled way of his. All power and confidence, he didn’t just walk. He prowled. He’d taken off his jacket and his shoulders and biceps bulged through his T-shirt. He didn’t look dangerous so much as that he could become dangerous, if necessary, at a moment’s notice.

“It’s apple!” Ace proclaimed it like he couldn’t believe his luck.

“That’s going be good.” Jax stood a mere foot or two away. “I had one of your apple pies last week, you know.”

“Really?” Surprised, I looked straight up into his eyes. Mistake. He looked at me as if he were drinking me in. Sometimes, I had to wonder if he was having exactly the same insane reaction to me as I was to him. Even though nothing had ever happened, and nothing ever would. We’d never even been alone together, always just saying a few friendly words to each other with his granddad as our chaperone.

“I bought one of your pies at Romi’s,” Jax explained.

“How did you know I sold them there?”

“Ace told me a couple months ago. I’ve been buying them ever since. They’re all good.”

“Thanks.”

“When did you cut your hair?” Jax didn’t ask if I had, he asked when, as if he remembered clearly how long I usually wore it. His hand moved, as if he were about to reach out and touch it. But then he dropped it again to his side.

“A few days ago.” Self-conscious, I raked my fingers through, knowing I must look awfully plain in my scrubs with the front of my hair back in a clip. I barely had on any make up. I’d been in his bar. I knew the kind of women he usually had all around him. Compared to them, I must look like a nun.

“Looks good.” He kept his hands at his sides, staying a respectful distance away, nothing suggestive in his tone or posture, but dang if I didn’t feel tingly all over. I smiled and blushed, thrilled all out-of-proportion that he’d noticed. But that was the thing about the heart, it just sort-of did what it wanted. If it chose to soar up like a balloon because Jax gave me a compliment, well, that was what it did and no amount of straight-talk would pin it down to the ground.

“She always looks good.” Ace jumped in as if to my defense. “Now, let’s all have some of this pie! I’ve got one of those…” Ace gestured in the air. “Those flat things? You use with pie?”

“A pie server?”

“Yep. Up there, I think.” He pointed to a high cabinet. I wasn’t sure why he would put something like that way up where it was hard to reach, but it wasn’t the first time I’d helped an elderly resident remember the word for something, or retrieve it from an unlikely place. Stretching up, on my tippy-toes, I reached into the upper cabinet, feeling around without being able to see inside.

“Here, let me.” Jax came to the rescue, reaching easily up and over me to get the serving knife. His body heat sent a shiver down my spine. My eyelids fluttered closed for half a second as I caught his scent, masculine and mint.

“Thanks.” My voice sounded breathy, like I’d just run a lap instead of standing still. So close to him, my blood pounded like I’d broken into a full sprint.

It was a small kitchen and to navigate the space, he wrapped a hand along my waist, sliding me to the side as he stood at the counter. He held me a fraction of a second longer than was necessary. But not as long as I would have liked.

Gesturing toward the pie, Jax raised an eyebrow. “You having some?” Why did everything he said sound suggestive? Must be my hormones on high alert. The man wasn’t offering to lick pie filling off of me nice and slow, taking his time to make sure he didn’t miss a drop. Even if that was where my dirty mind went. His biceps bulged as he cut a slice of pie. That wasn’t fair.

“Thanks, I’m OK.”

“I think you need to indulge a little more, Sky.” That low, smoky voice, the sinful smile playing on his lips, maybe I wasn’t the only one with a dirty mind.

Mouth open, about to respond, my phone went off with a loud ding. I stepped away to check my text message.

Mike: See you home @ 5 tonight.

Right. That would be hard since my shift didn’t end until six p.m. I tucked the phone back into my pocket without replying, giving my wedding ring a nervous twist. The text was a good reminder. I should get a move on. Mike would not like it if he could see me with Jax. He figured everyone I saw all day long was either old or female, since all the nurses and aides were women. Jax Branson definitely didn’t fit into either of those categories.

“You two enjoy the pie!” Briskly, I headed for the door, dismissing Ace’s protests. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to keep making my rounds. But happy anniversary, Ace!”

Walking out into the hallway, I realized I was shaking. Jax did something to me. Ever since the first time I’d met him, he’d intrigued me. His bar was a favorite motorcycle club hangout, and I’d seen him on his own fierce ride, but he wasn’t a brother. He hung with the Skulls and they all respected him, I could tell by the way Mike had introduced me, but he was independent, his own man.

I couldn’t explain the effect he had on me. But I bet he could make me cum in about 10 seconds flat.

Except I was married. It didn’t make any difference that I’d tied the knot during a night in Vegas I could barely remember and my signature on the wedding license probably looked a lot like an X. It didn’t matter that my husband had started spending a heck of a lot of evenings away from home. It didn’t even count that I was beginning to wonder if the man I’d married was not actually a good man after all.

I still wore the ring. So I had to resist the intense pull of attraction. But just because I resisted it didn’t mean I didn’t feel it.

There was nothing between me and Jax, and nothing had happened, nothing at all. I repeated it to myself as I continued my rounds. There was no reason to feel guilty. But I did feel guilty. Because I so desperately wished that something would.

2

Jax

I walked toward the two guys, sizing up the situation. Saturday nights were always busy and this was no exception. One of them I knew well, a Skull. The other didn’t look familiar. I didn’t think he was a Reaper, but you never knew. Who would have guessed that owning a bar could feel so much like being a high school principal? If the high school happened to be in the middle of rival gang territory in L.A.

“How we doin’, guys?” I asked in my well-worn “let’s all settle down” voice. The Skull darted a look at me from the corner of his eye. He knew enough to understand I would not let trash go down in my bar. The other guy, though? He might need an education.

“You want another beer?” I tried good cop on the guy I didn’t recognize. But he didn’t take the easy way out. Instead, his jaw flexed, eyes narrowing in on the man he intended to harm. Not in my bar, if I had my way, and I usually did.

“Let’s take it outside, gentlemen.” I caught the eye of one of my bouncers, adding some “what the heck is taking you so long?” into my glance. They needed to be on this type of thing. Along with my business partner, Tommy, I owned the place. I couldn’t afford to be the guy kicking rear and taking names, which also meant making enemies. I paid people to do that trash. But somehow I always seemed to be the one with my finger on the pulse, sensing the violence before it erupted. Guess I’d been around it long enough to know it intimately.

I caught the punch before it landed, swiftly grabbing the guy’s arm and twisting it up behind his back while I kicked the back of his knee, making him lose his balance. It helped that he was drunk. Sober and weighing in around 225, I easily had the upper hand. And a lot of backup. Finally kicking into gear, a couple of bouncers took it from there, leading the much more compliant Skull and his nemesis outside where they could do whatever they wanted. At least fifty feet away from my property.

“Now, what can I get you ladies?” Swooping three pretty young things under my arms, I ushered them toward the bar. I’d learned a lot over the years about diffusing and distracting. Better to have girls happily flirting and drinking than standing and gawking. The last thing drunk guys needed was an audience to show off their prowess. Some people thought gladiatorial displays had gone out of style with the Romans. I knew better.

I kept them occupied for a few minutes, turning on my practiced skills. To be honest, it didn’t take much. It probably sounded egotistical, but my experience was that if I wore a short-sleeved T-shirt and stood around, big arms crossed over my big chest, it didn’t take long for a woman to start running her hands along my muscles. Add to that the fact that I was the owner, and I basically had it made.

Funny, though, standing there surrounded by hot girls in short skirts, my mind wandered to that delicious little nurse’s aide I usually saw when I visited Ace. Sky was like a ripe, juicy peach, so fresh, sweet and rounded just right. She didn’t seem to know how sexy she was, her curvy rear and full breasts always hidden in baggy scrubs. She barely even wore any makeup, though she did blush easily. That faint pink flush stealing across her cheeks gave me all kinds of nasty ideas. I’d like to pink her up all over.

I was careful, though. I kept the brakes on around her. I’d never done anything more than exchange a few casual words when she checked in on Ace.

She was married. I could see the ring on her finger, plus Griller had introduced me to her when she’d first moved to town. She probably didn’t remember, but I did. Her brute of a husband had brought her by my bar, showing her off like a prize he’d won at the county fair. I’d wondered why such a beauty had teamed up with that beast, especially since I knew Griller wasn’t going to turn into a prince one day. He was never going to learn manners and waltz around with her while a candlestick sang.

I hadn’t understood the match even before I’d learned how kind and thoughtful Sky was, always helping everyone around her, brightening everyone’s days. She remembered little details about every resident in that home, making each of them feel special. When I saw her in the courtyard or the dining hall, I couldn’t help but watch her like some sort of hulking stalker in the corner, riveted by her easy grace as she laughed, brushing her hair behind her ears, her lyrical voice greeting and chatting. She treated everyone around her right. I had to wonder, was she getting the same treatment from her man?

But I knew Sky’s business wasn’t mine. She wasn’t my woman to have and to hold. Yet attraction was attraction. You couldn’t fight chemistry, it was either there or it wasn’t. And for some reason it was there in a big way with Sky. Maybe it was the pies. I’d grown addicted, thinking about the soft and curvy woman who’d baked them every time I sat down for a slice, then usually ate half the pie in one sitting.

Crowd dispersed, conflict avoided for at least the time being, I took my favorite post, standing behind the corner of the bar where I could survey all the action. The bar was packed. I guess you could say it was a rough crowd. To tell the truth, I knew a lot of bad guys. Some people might say that made me one of them. I didn’t see it that way.

Over in the corner, I spotted a guy pawing at a woman like she was puppy chow and he was a mangy mutt who hadn’t had a meal in a week. I’d give him a minute to settle down. Then, if he hadn’t stopped, I’d see to it that he did.

I loved owning a bar. I swear I did. But sometimes I wondered if I’d picked the wrong location.

I’d moved back to Cavallo four years ago, mostly to be near Ace. He was the only family I had left in what I guess could be considered my hometown. I’d moved around a lot in my 27 years, starting off in Cavallo, then doing time everywhere from Massachusetts to Florida, where my father was last we spoke, to Texas where my mother was shacked up with her latest boyfriend. But Ace had come through for me when no one else wanted to, back when I was 16 and fresh out of juvie.

Ace had taken me in, under the condition that I cut out all the trash. Somehow, he’d made me listen to him. I’d straightened out, gotten my high school diploma, and then roamed around some until Ace had himself a heart attack. When that happened, I’d moved back to Cavallo. I figured after all he’d done for me, the least I could do was check in on the guy from time to time and be there if he needed some help.

I was glad I’d come back to Cavallo, gratified that I co-owned Ace Bar and Lounge, but those motorcycle clubs kicked up a heck of a lot of drama. Some days I felt like I was in a housewives reality show only much more bloody. Sometimes I thought about what it would be like to run a bar someplace mellow and chill. Maybe a vacation destination where people just wanted to relax.

Looking over at the mangy mutt, I saw he’d gone from bad to worse. The woman now had a seriously pissed off look on her face, but his hand kept trying to dive on up her skirt. With two fingers, I signaled to a bouncer over in the corner. He stepped in, broke it up and then, reluctantly, headed over in response to my demanding look.

“Hey, boss.” He sounded a heck of a lot like a kid that had been sent to the principal’s office.

“You know what I’m going to say.” I kept my eyes on the crowd.

“Yeah.” He looked all hangdog.

“I need you on trash before it starts. Not just responding when I tell you.”

“I know.” He agreed, though I could tell there was a “but” coming.

“But?” I prompted. Better to clear the air than let things fester.

“But we’re a biker bar, boss.”

“We are a bar that is open to one and all, including bikers. We are not a biker bar.”

I was getting tired of explaining that. It wasn’t that I looked down on bikers. Heck, my ride was parked right outside. I cruised around on my chopper with the best of them. With my shaved head, leather jacket and tattoos plus my sheer size, I was sure most people assumed I was in a motorcycle club, myself.

But that was the thing. I’d never much liked the labels other people put on me. Thug. Wrong side of the tracks. Criminal. Just because I felt right at home among all that, didn’t mean it defined me. Joining a motorcycle club and pledging allegiance to someone else’s bloody code of tribal honor would never be my choice. I lived life on my own terms, even if that made me a lone wolf.

§

Late Monday morning I got a text.

Zeke: headin your way tonight

Aw, incredible. Zeke was coming to my bar? The man had some balls. Skulls owned west of L.A.; Iron Reapers owned the east. Skulls hung out at Ace Bar and Lounge. Reapers did not. But Zeke never did what he was told. And I had to admit, it was part of what I liked about him.

Zeke and I went way back. We hadn’t seen each other in a few months, not since around Thanksgiving and here it was early February, but that didn’t matter. We could go a year or more and get right back into a groove. It was like that with people you’d known since you were kids, especially if you’d gone through some trash together. Zeke and I had both done time in juvie when we were 15. He’d had a longer sentence than mine, but the nine months we’d overlapped we’d shared a cell. He’d had my back, I’d had his and we hadn’t stopped since.

Funny how going through heck with someone could form a lifelong friendship. I could count on one hand the friends I’d trust with my life. Actually, I didn’t even need all five fingers for Zeke, Liam, Chase, and Ian. What did we all have in common? Nearly dying together. Back in juvie, Zeke and I had fought for each other like animals locked in a pen.

As for Liam, Chase and Ian? One night had bound us together, changing the rest of our lives. We’d had no clue it was going to, of course. We’d been 14, dumb as mess with all the arrogance of early adolescence. Ian and I had stolen a boat and not thought twice about it. What could go wrong? It was a harmless joyride. Liam and Chase had agreed, hopping on board without a moment’s hesitation.

Growing up, my dad worked construction and my mom cleaned houses. My family hadn’t exactly gone boating. I’d had no clue how lost we could get once the sun went down and a storm hit. It never even entered my mind as a remote possibility that a wall of water the size of a two-story building could appear out of nowhere and smash our boat in two.

That accident had sent me spiraling down, literally and figuratively. Thank goodness all of us had lived, but not all of us had walked away like I had. Ian was in a wheelchair for life. The sight of him trapped under a fallen, fiery mast would haunt me until the day I died. I’d landed in juvie not long afterward, and when I’d gotten out neither my mom nor my dad had wanted anything to do with me. It turned out when you stole a boat and sank it, then got caught dealing pot, plus breaking and entering, your parents got pretty pissed off.

But not Ace. He’d taken me in when no one else would. I swore I’d never forget what he’d done for me as long as I lived.

I took a shower and decided it was a good time for a visit. Mondays I usually took the whole day off, working out then heading over to see Ace. But with Zeke stopping by, it looked like today I should visit first, then head over to the bar. I needed to be there to keep things running smooth.

Outside the front entrance of the Cavallo Canyon home, a woman was selling flowers. I had a crazy impulse to buy some roses. But not for Ace.

That was why I didn’t buy them. What would Sky think if a big, gruff guy like me showed up bringing her flowers? She’d probably freak out, maybe get mad. She’d likely flash her ring at me and hop on the phone to that husband of hers. Then he’d cause a scene. I could handle him. I’d already done it once or twice at my bar when he’d gotten too drunk for his own good.

But I had enough sense to stop myself from doing it. Even though, walking up the stairs, I still pictured Sky’s face, all rosy and happy, looking down at the flowers, then up at me. Logic didn’t seem to figure in too well when it came to Sky. It didn’t make sense that I looked for her as I walked down the hallway to Ace’s apartment. Or that when I knocked at his door, I hoped she’d be the one to open up, getting all flushed and shy when she saw me.

No Sky in sight, Ace and I had a good visit, like we always did. We played some Gin Rummy out on his patio, enjoying the sunshine and people-watching. Ace was quite the popular guy, enjoying the attention of more than a few of the local ladies.

“What’re you laughing about, old man?” he asked me after he got two women in their 70s giggling like school girls over his compliments.

“Just admiring your game, Ace.” I chuckled, marveling at how smooth he was. I did all right with women, but I mostly attributed that to being big and strong. I’d learned as a teenager the power of bulking up, in more ways than one, and I’d been hitting the weights ever since. But suave pick-up lines? That was Ace’s department, all the way.

“You’re looking for Sky,” he observed, catching me glancing around again.

“No.” My protest convinced no one.

“Yes, you are, and if I were your age I’d be doing the exact same thing. Now read ‘em and weep.” He laid his cards down in sets, throwing the final card onto the table to signal victory.

I shook my head, disgusted with myself for multiple reasons. Only a low down dawg lusted after a married woman. I should be ashamed of myself. I was ashamed of myself. It stopped me from doing anything more than looking around for her and then, once I found her, looking at her. She had to think I was a little soft in the head the way I stared at her. I’d seen her at least two dozen times over the past year Ace had lived there, but I never said much. Because the things I thought about saying to her weren’t the kinds of things I should say to another man’s wife.

Ace and I hung out until around four. Then I excused myself, explaining how Zeke was planning on heading up to the bar tonight.

“You better get your rear over there and stop the fights before they break out.”

“Exactly what I was thinking.” See, Ace knew what was what. He’d known Zeke a long time, and knew he was in the Reapers. But he didn’t give me any lectures, no stern words of warning. Ace trusted me to do the right thing. I wasn’t sure why, but he always had. And it made me trust myself.

As I was heading out, I finally got what I’d been looking for. Sky was heading down the hallway, struggling with an awkward, heavy-looking cart. Hands behind her to drag it, straining with effort, her full breasts pushed against her shirt. It gave me all kinds of wrong ideas.

“Here, let me help you.” I took a few long strides to catch up with her and grabbed the metal cart with my much-larger hands. She looked up with surprise, then dang if she didn’t smile up at me like the sun breaking through the clouds. Her eyes were the color of her name, so light blue, and her wavy, honey brown hair framed her face in soft waves. If I could see that smile every day, like I’d performed some kind of heroic magic, I’d die a happy man.

“Thank you!” She rubbed her wrist, then tucked it under her other arm. “That cart is crazy.”

“One of the wheels is stuck.” I pushed it back and forth, figuring out which one was giving her trouble.

“I can barely get it down the hallway, but I’ve got to deliver these books.”

“Why don’t you grab a few for the people who live close by? Leave the cart with me and I’ll give it a quick look.”

“Really?” She looked delighted. I guessed I didn’t have to buy her roses after all to see that look on her face. Her smile glowed even brighter than I’d imagined. Still, she seemed reluctant and a little shy to take me up on my offer. She gave a few more protests about how I didn’t need to take the time, like maybe she wasn’t all that used to accepting help.

“It’ll only take a minute,” I assured her.

She agreed, walking off to make some deliveries. I shuffled the remaining books off the cart, flipped it on its side, unscrewed the wheel and tightened it up with a tool on my Swiss army knife. The whole thing was back assembled, restocked and moving easily before she’d even finished.

But I didn’t leave. I couldn’t just abandon those books. Plus, sticking around might have something to do with wanting to see Sky again before I left. The few times I’d come to visit Ace and not seen her at all, I’d left deflated and disappointed. Even a brief interaction didn’t feel like enough anymore. I tried not to think about how messed up that was.

Killing time, I checked out the books: mysteries and romances. Some of the romance novels had impressive covers, with bare-chested swashbuckling pirates and aristocratic, broad-shouldered dukes.

“Are you interested in borrowing that one?” Sky asked in a cheeky tone. The minx had sidled up to me without my realizing it and caught me checking out one of the steamier paperbacks.

“Spicy books they have here.” I put it back onto the cart.

“Tell me about it. I’m the one who has to read them out loud.”

“You do?” That I’d like to hear. She nodded, blushing a little. “Even the sex scenes?”

She burst out with a peal of laughter, the merry sound lifting up into the hallway. “They’d never forgive me if I skipped the best parts!”

“I’d like to hear you read those.” That came out huskier than I’d intended. She looked down and away. “Anyway, your cart’s fixed.” I took a few steps toward the stairwell in retreat. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“Thanks, Jax.”

“You’re welcome, Sky.” As I walked down toward the front entrance, I thought that might have been the first time she’d used my name. I liked hearing it on her lips. She was usually reserved around me, not meeting my eyes. I wasn’t too surprised. I was a big, tough looking guy. Though her husband was, too, so that shouldn’t be too off-putting to her.

Scowling, I slipped on my sunglasses. What was I doing, thinking about some other man’s woman? But I kept right on doing exactly that as I rode on over to my bar. She had such a sensual mouth. Those full lips, even with no lipstick they looked plump and delectable, tempting me to kiss, lick and bite.

I didn’t like the thought of her with Griller. I didn’t know him well, but from what I’d seen of him I didn’t want to know him any better. Messing with his woman was asking for trouble.

Speaking of, Zeke was standing outside my bar when I arrived. He and another guy, I assumed a fellow Reaper, were smoking cigarettes, their shoulders hunched, their eyes shifty and alert. As I walked toward them, Zeke broke out into a grin.

“What are you doing showing up here?” I asked. “You wanna be startin something?”

“Long live the King of Pop, brother.” Zeke hugged me with one arm, thumped his chest with the other, then held his fingers up in a peace sign to the dearly departed.

“You’ll be lucky if you get a dance-off in there.” I jerked my head toward the bar. Not all gang fights got settled like they did in a Michael Jackson music video.

“You know I’d win a dance-off.” Zeke gave me a cocky smile. He hadn’t changed a bit in the 10-plus years I’d known him.

“Who’s your friend?” I nodded toward his silent companion.

“Cotton here’s a good guy. Nothing to worry about.” The guy looked a little too jumpy for my taste. I’d bet good money he had a Glock inside his jacket and a switchblade in his back pocket. And I bet he liked using them both.

But Zeke was like family, so he and whatever he dragged along with him were welcome in my house. That didn’t mean they needed to walk in through the front door, though.

“C’mon in over here.” I led them in through the side entrance, then took them into my office. They’d already attracted enough attention as it was. Going on four years running the place, I’d gained trust in the community. Most of the Skulls knew I was tight with a Reaper and accepted it, even respected the fact that I’d done some time. Then again, trust turned on a dime with those guys.

Closing the door, I settled into an armchair. “All right, man. Tell me what you’re doing here.” Zeke and I hung out from time to time, but never on this turf. Sometimes he’d come visit if I had a party over at my place, or we’d meet up at a bar we both liked down the coast about a half an hour. But this was not a social call.

Zeke and his buddy exchanged a brief look. I could read Cotton’s unspoken question, “You sure he’s cool?” and Zeke’s reassurance, “He’s cool.” Then Zeke explained to me, “We’re looking for a guy.”

I nodded, unsurprised. Revenge in the form of blood was a way of life for these clubs.

“His name’s Griller. You know him?”

Now I felt a little surprised. They were after Sky’s husband. But I’d been around the block enough times to keep my thoughts hidden behind an impenetrable wall of no reaction whatsoever. I gave a neutral reply. “I know all the Skulls.”

“Griller’s the one we want,” the jumpy guy piped up. Moving forward in his seat, I could tell he was eager to give me the whole story. “He’s—”

“I don’t want to know why.” Hands up, I stopped him from briefing me on all the gory details. The only way I stayed impartial, among clubs but not in bed with them, was by staying one step removed.

“Sure, sure.” Zeke flashed Cotton a “calm the heck down” glance. “We’re not trying to drag you into this.”

“You’re not?” Sarcasm weighed down my words.

“Listen, all I’m trying to say is the guy’s a Grade A psychopath. He’s gone too far.”

And that was said by Zeke, a man I was pretty sure had a multiple body count to his name. So that was saying something. I hadn’t liked the idea of Sky with Griller even before knowing that. Was this Grade A psychopath hurting her? “OK.” I nodded.

“OK?” Zeke looked at me, questioning how far I’d be willing to go.

“I hear you.” I held back the protective growl forming deep in my throat, urging me to act swift and strong to protect Sky. Because life was more complicated than a mythical fable of good vs. evil. I might want to draw my sword and strike down the dragon, but in reality sometimes the maiden in distress didn’t want to be rescued. Griller might be a mongrel, but he was Sky’s husband and she might be in love with him.

Plus, it wasn’t as if handing over a brother to another club would go down quiet. I’d spent the past four years building up my professional reputation as a reliable, neutral party. Ratting someone out would blow up all the trust I’d earned. It wasn’t completely out of the question, but an extreme measure would require extreme motivation.

“Will you keep an eye out for him?” Zeke asked.

Setting my beer onto a table, I leaned forward, elbows on my knees, hands clasped together before me. I made eye contact with Cotton, then Zeke, making sure I had their complete attention.

“Zeke,” I began. “One day, if you come to me and tell me you have a sick kid, or someone’s threatening your wife, I will stop at nothing to help you. But you come here and tell me a guy from the Skulls is messing with the Reapers?” I shrugged.

Cotton started out of his seat, but Zeke put out his hand, motioning for him to sit still. “I hear you, man.” Zeke looked at me, assessing and respecting my words. “But if you happen to see this idiot—”

“Got it.” I rose. “Now if you two gentlemen will excuse me, I’ve got a bar to run.”

The two of them left out the side door, climbing on their bikes without incident. I headed out onto the floor, checking in with the manager on duty and the bartender. Monday nights were easy.

Standing where I could watch it all, I wondered when Griller would next walk into my bar. And I wondered what, if anything, I’d do about it. Zeke had clearly not changed his ways, nor would he ever. He was still up to the same old trash and always would be. My time in juvie hadn’t exactly sent me running in the opposite direction. I’d never be an FBI agent or a cop. But I’d stayed on the right side of the law since then, even if most guys I knew didn’t. Still, no matter how much I tried to avoid it, trouble seemed to follow me around, dogging my path.

A woman gave an extra swing to her hips as she approached, flashing me a sultry smile. I could see a good three inches of deep cleavage down her clingy V-neck. She’d be fun, I was sure. A simple good time, the way I usually liked it.

It made no sense that instead I pictured Sky. Dragging that awkward cart behind her, her top had twisted tight across her chest. I wanted to take that shirt off and see her straining and panting for a whole other reason.

“Good to see you, Jax.” The woman in front of me pressed a hand to my chest and ground against my hip.

“Hope you have a good night tonight.” I gave her a dismissive nod, keeping my attention on the room as a whole. She scowled and left.

I was clearly losing my mind, turning away a woman ready to go in a tight little skirt, choosing instead to stand alone and think about one in uniform scrubs. But it went beyond physical attraction with Sky. There was a story to her, one I wanted to learn. I could see hints of it in those sky-colored eyes, so guarded at times, so open at others. I could see it in the way her face transformed when she laughed, all traces of worry vanished for a few seconds of joy. I wanted to unravel who she was as much as I wanted to undress her.

But she happened to be married to a Grade A psychopath, according to Zeke. I swore under my breath, not liking the knowledge I now had. Trouble had followed me all my life. Trouble was written all over Sky. That must be why I couldn’t stop thinking about her.

3

Sky

I couldn’t wait for Daylight Savings. True, I’d lose an hour of sleep over the weekend “springing forward,” but coming home from work in the pitch black sucked. It had been dark when I’d gone in to work, too, heading there early so an aide who usually took the early morning shift could go see her kid in a school performance.

The light was on in the kitchen. I should have figured out Mike was home, but my brain was foggy and slow. I didn’t have much room to process visual clues when all I could think about was how much I wanted to take off my shoes, sit down, and watch the stupidest TV show I could possibly find.

“I was wondering when you were going to get home.”

I nearly jumped out of my skin when Mike rounded the corner. “I didn’t know you were here!” Hand to my chest, my heart raced a hundred miles an hour.

“Expecting someone else?” His comment had a suspicious edge.

“No, of course not. You’re just usually not here when I get home.” Or sometimes when I woke up, either. That had been happening more and more lately. Sometimes he slept on the couch, saying he didn’t want to wake me when he got in really late or had to take off extra early. At first, I’d felt hurt and confused. Then I’d learned to enjoy the extra room in bed.

“What, I can’t come home to have dinner with my wife?” He pressed me close in a suffocating hug. Alcohol wafted from his breath when he kissed me, and I had to exert effort not to flinch. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

I guess I hadn’t tried hard enough. I brightened up my smile. “Of course I’m happy to see you. I’m just surprised. And I’m sorry, I don’t have anything planned for dinner.” I didn’t even think we had much food in the fridge.

“Nothing?” He looked disappointed.

“If I’d known you were going to be here—”

“How many times do we have to have this conversation?” His voice rose, loud and angry, and his hands tightened on my arms. “It’s not like I get a schedule handed to me every morning. I’m not a suit. Rubbish happens. I never know whether I’ll be home or not.”

I pulled away, looking down, wondering how it was possible that we were already fighting. Conflict seemed to erupt between us over nothing, the slightest breeze fanning sparks into a blaze.

“C’mere, baby.” He grabbed me back, using a conciliatory tone. “I don’t want to fight tonight.”

“I don’t want to fight, either.” I felt so tired. He stroked my hair, his hand snaking around my waist. He kissed me again and I could taste he’d been drinking hard liquor, not just beer. “I want to get you pregnant.”

He placed his hand on my belly, rubbing it. I was glad my face was against his shoulder so he couldn’t see my reaction. I’d never been good at hiding my emotions. Eyes wide in dismay, I was sure I had “hell no” written all over my face.

“We’ll have a kid,” he continued. “Everything’ll be good between us.”

I kissed him back, on autopilot, thinking how I used to feel that way, too. He’d started talking about wanting a kid about a year ago, and at first I’d been excited. I’d always dreamed of having children one day. I was married and settled, so that seemed like the logical next step.

But as the months passed same as they always did, no babies on the way, my heart started feeling heavy. And then I realized why. It wasn’t that I was worried that I wouldn’t get pregnant. I was worried that I would.

He reached up my shirt and unclasped my bra, laughing as he did it. “That’s the one thing I like about these baggy scrubs. They’re easy to reach around in.”

I shrugged out of my shirt, letting my bra fall to the floor, trying for all I was worth to get in the mood. I’d never felt magical fireworks with Mike, not even the first time we’d kissed. But, honestly, I’d never felt them with anyone. I’d figured you could either waste your time waiting around for Prince Charming, or you could jump onto the horse of the guy who actually rode up to your door. Or motorcycle, as was the case with Mike.

Now? A lifetime seemed like a pretty long ride. And waiting around didn’t sound so bad, either. At least I could slip off my shoes and watch some trashy reality TV.

Mike grabbed my rear, grinding against me as he palmed my breast. I drew my hand down to his hips, sliding it along his crotch where I felt…nothing. Soft as a baby’s bottom.

He tensed at my touch. I tried to pretend like it was no big deal, or like I hadn’t noticed. But he knew I’d felt him, flaccid. He’d been that way a lot lately. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time he’d gotten it up. There was no way I could ask him about it. He’d lose his mind. I guessed all men were sensitive on that subject.

I had to wonder, though, what was wrong. Was it me? Did he not find me attractive anymore? Or was he on something? I knew he drank a lot, but sometimes he also popped pills. I guessed they were speed or some kind of uppers since he had to stay awake late at night. Did they cause impotence?

All pretense of fooling around halted, the two of us just standing there, I felt like I had to say something. “Is everything…OK with you?” I asked, quiet and hesitant.

“Sky! Why is it always about me?” He pulled away, pounding his fist onto the kitchen counter so hard it made the dishes on it jump. “And what is this trash?” He picked up a dirty plate, shoving it close to my face for me to see.

“Mike!” I pulled back. “I wasn’t trying to say—”

“Maybe if you were around more! Where were you when I got home?”

“My shift doesn’t end until six.” I hated it when he got angry. He didn’t listen, just ranted.

“You left the place a pigsty.” He picked up a dirty coffee mug I’d left out on the counter.

“I had to go into work early this morning.”

With sudden, fierce vehemence, he threw the plate and mug against the wall. The mug made a loud bang and then a thud as it dropped to the floor, but the plate smashed into pieces, jagged bits scattering out in a wide splash. I screamed, frightened, and covered my ears.

He stood, slightly unsteady on his feet and breathing heavy. Raking a hand through his hair, he looked at me accusatorily. “I think you should quit that job of yours.” Then he grabbed his jacket and slammed out of the apartment.

Shaking, I stood there and tried to tell myself that everything was all right. Yes, Mike had a temper, but he wasn’t a bad guy. Every couple went through tough times. Weathering them was what marriage was all about.

I told myself that, but I didn’t believe it.

§

“Come get some sunshine with us.” Ace winked at me as he put on his jacket, getting ready for a courtyard stroll. Jax stood by his side, hands in his pockets, watching me intently.

“I should probably go check on Sandi,” I said, reluctantly.

“What, Sandi down the hall? You like her better than me?”

“You know I don’t like anyone better than you, Ace.” I handed him his cane with a smile.

“Look at this girl.” He motioned to Jax. “Such a charmer.” Jax just nodded, but I blushed under the weight of his stare. Ace pulled on his cap, setting it at a rakish tilt.

“I love that cap,” I complimented him. The man had style.

“See?” He directed his comment at his grandson again. “If you wore more caps like me you’d do better with the ladies.”

“Oh, I’m sure Jax does just fine with the ladies.” The words were out of my mouth before I realized what I was saying.

“Are you now?” Ace chuckled.

“What makes you say that?” The big man himself crossed the room slowly toward me.

I cleared my throat, wondering why in the heck I’d blurted out such a thing. I might as well have told them both that I thought Jax was gorgeous. But the man was, and he had to know it. In my experience, men who looked like him attracted women like flies to honey. And the women who got stuck on them fared about as well as the dead flies. That was why they called men like him lady-killers.

Only Jax didn’t set off my alarm bells the way those types of guys usually did. He had none of that off-putting brash cockiness, that “aren’t you lucky to be talking to me” full-of-himself vibe. Instead, it seemed like Jax paid attention to me. A lot of attention. I shivered as he stood next to me, all too aware of his body heat, his sheer size.

“Jax didn’t even go to prom!” Ace called out as he pushed open the sliding glass door onto his patio.

“Making me look so good.” Jax rolled his eyes as he escorted me out, following Ace. He rested his hand lightly on my lower back, polite, even chivalrous, but the contact made my heart leap. “What’s next, Ace, are you going to pull out a few photos from when I was thirteen?”

“He was a gawky kid, this guy,” Ace told me, conspiratorially, linking his arm through mine. I guessed I was accompanying him on his stroll. “He’s filled out now, but first he got all that height and weighed about 120 pounds.”

“That is not true.” Jax shook his head. I couldn’t stifle a raucous laugh at the image. He was so big and burly now, but I guessed that hadn’t always been the case. “Sure, laugh it up,” he teased me. “I bet you never went through an awkward phase. You were always gorgeous.”

That made me burst out laughing all over again. Plus feel all warm inside. Had he just told me he thought I was gorgeous? “In middle school, I cut my own bangs. That did not go so well.”

“Never a good idea,” Jax agreed.

“And then there was the time I decided to bleach some streaks in my hair.”

“Why the streaks? I see it on you young girls all the time,” Ace mused, ambling by my side at a slow, strolling pace.

“Some people can pull it off. But skunk stripes were not a good look for me.” At least that one had been easy to fix with some hair dye. The bangs had taken months to look normal again.

Ace paused to greet some of his neighbors, engaging them in the friendly banter that came to him so naturally. Jax and I stood around, looking at our shoes, the plants in the courtyard, anything but each other.

“You been doing any baking lately?” he finally asked.

That was a subject I could talk about all day. As long as I didn’t look directly at him. That was like staring right at the sun. I knew I’d get burned. Speaking to his forearm—and what a forearm it was, all corded with muscle with a light dusting of hair—I told him about my experimentations with crusts, how I was thinking about adding more cinnamon into my apple pies, and how excited I was now that it was mid-March and we were starting to get fresh, ripe, locally-grown strawberries.

“Have you ever been to the farmer’s market downtown?” He shook his head “no.” As I glanced up to catch his reaction, I nearly lost my train of thought. His eyes were so dark, but in the bright mid-day sunlight I could see some flecks of caramel. He had a bit of stubble on his strong jaw. I bet it would feel good against my skin, all scratchy in exactly the right way.

“Anyway—” I pulled my gaze away, reining in my thoughts. “There’s a great farmer’s market downtown Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings. This week I’m going to try to find strawberries and rhubarb.”

“Strawberry-rhubarb pie.” Jax made an appreciative sound deep in his throat. It didn’t make me think about baking.

“Do you like that?” My voice sounded a little too dazed, too husky. I cleared my throat. “That kind of pie? The flavor?” I rushed to clarify.

“Mmm-hmm.” The man made the sexiest sounds I’d ever heard, standing in broad daylight going for an exercise walk with his grandpa. I made a mental note to never let myself be alone with Jax. It would mean all kinds of trouble.

“How did you learn to bake?” Such a simple question, but I couldn’t remember the last time anyone had asked me, or if anyone ever had.

“I sort-of taught myself,” I reflected. “You can learn a lot on YouTube.” Back in my eighth and ninth grade years, I hadn’t had a whole lot going on after school. I’d been too young to do much more than babysit to earn a living, and I’d never been all that athletic so I wasn’t on any teams. It was just my mom and me in our little apartment, and she’d worked every day until six and then stayed out after, so I’d come home and baked.

“Your mom didn’t teach you?”

“No, she’s not really a baker.” Or much of a cook. Or one to spend much time in the kitchen or around home at all. “We’re pretty different, my mom and I.”

He nodded, seeming to understand. I’d always admired my mother’s naturally extroverted personality and her flair for fashion and style. And I’d always suspected she found me somewhat boring, her quiet daughter who preferred baking at home instead of going out to parties. When I’d told her I was marrying Mike, she’d been dumbfounded. “Don’t you want to go out and experience more of life?” she’d asked. My answer: not really. I’d never felt much desire to bust out wild and crazy. Only maybe now I was starting to think my mother had had a point.

Ace started making his way down the courtyard again, and Jax and I fell into step. “Watch out.” Jax said it to both of us, pointing out a branch that had fallen across the path. He brought his hand to my elbow, guiding me to the side. I had to fight my impulse to lean into him, taking the excuse to brush against his wall of muscles, maybe even fake losing my balance so I could press my palm to his rock-hard chest.

“There you go.” He gave my arm a light caress with his thumb as he let go. The touch went straight to my head like fizzy, bubbly champagne. That wasn’t good. People got reckless when they drank. The last thing I needed was to lose my inhibitions around that man.

“I’m going to go check in on Sandi.” I hung a left, walking over toward a side entrance. “You two enjoy the rest of your walk!”

“Come back!” Ace called after me.

I smiled, giving him a wave. “See you later.”

“See you later, Sky.” That rumbling voice, so deep and warm. I replayed it over and over throughout the rest of my afternoon and evening, cherishing it like a favorite and well-kept secret.

§

Wednesday night I made strawberry rhubarb pie. First, I scoured the Internet for as many recipes as I could find. Then, I dove into my baking books, circling and dog-earring, stickie notes all over the place. I was going to make the best strawberry rhubarb pies the world had ever seen. Because maybe, just maybe, Jax would get a taste.

I still hadn’t hit on exactly the right flavor combination for strawberry rhubarb pie, so I’d never brought one to Romi’s. If I figured one out, though, I was sure they’d be interested. Every morning I took over pies, they claimed they sold out by lunchtime.

Apron on, poofs of flour and dashes of sugar flying around me, I set to work. Mike was out, who knew where, and frankly I hoped it stayed that way. I could turn up the radio, sing along to the kind of upbeat syrupy pop songs I loved, and lose myself in creating the taste of home. Because to me, that was what the best pies tasted like. Not any home I’d ever experienced, mind you, but an idealized version, the home we all dreamed about with unconditional love, comfort and support. Sitting down at your kitchen table, even after a long, tough day, you could tuck into a slice and feel relaxed, satisfied and at peace.

Rolling out the crust, adding another twist of lemon or a pinch of sugar to the filling, I didn’t worry where Mike was and what he was doing. Or why I actually felt relieved that he no longer wanted to take me to hang with his crew. I didn’t wonder why I was happiest without him.

Instead, creating, mixing, tasting, I let myself daydream. Someday, maybe, when I brought pies to Romi’s, I’d see Jax. He’d ask me to sit and have a cup of coffee. We’d get a booth in the corner, somewhere private, and we’d talk for hours. I could look straight into those dark eyes, listen to his deep voice, and it wouldn’t stop there. Outside, he’d scoop me up onto the back of the chopper I’d seen him ride. I’d wrap my legs around him, not even caring where we went, just driving off with him, the motor rumbling between my legs while I held on tight.

§

The next Monday I didn’t work. Maria asked me to trade shifts with her so she could make a doctor’s appointment. I had no good reason to say no.

Tuesday morning I headed in, brightening up rooms with flowers and chatter. Most of the residents were so sweet, telling me how nice it was to see me, thanking me when all I was doing was my job. They didn’t know how much their appreciation lifted my spirits, too.

I spent some time with Ace. He was teaching me how to play Gin Rummy. It was slow going. I wasn’t exactly a natural card shark, but I enjoyed spending the time with him, as always. I breezed through the kinds of questions I had to ask, about what he’d eaten for breakfast and lunch and whether he’d taken his meds and done his daily walk. Ace was naturally social, so he tended to get up and about without too much prompting, and his upbeat sense of humor made going through my checklist easy and even fun.

On my way out, he told me, “Jax missed seeing you yesterday.” He waggled his eyebrows. Of course I wanted to ask more, breathlessly pressing him for details. “How do you know? Did he say so? Did he ask after me? Do you think he’s going to ask me to prom?” Recognizing the wide disconnect between the growing depth of my attachment and the reality of my life, I managed to say a neutral, “Oh.”

“If you weren’t married, I’d lock the two of you up in a closet. You’re just his type.” Ace winked at me. I promptly turned beet red.

“Ace.” I laughed as I stepped into the hallway, glad he couldn’t see my over-reaction to the idea of getting locked into a closet with Jax. My one request would be that Ace throw away the key.

I took some deep breaths, trying to forget the image. But how could I when there we’d be, in the dark, no one to stop us from falling into each other. A blur of hands and mouths, stripping off our clothes, panting, I’d rake my fingers down Jax’s back as he pressed me rough against the wall. Bad Sky. I had no idea how I could concentrate on anything now. Then I got to my cubby.

Every staff member had a little rectangle in a grid along a wall, dating back to the days when most communications were handed out via paper. We still got fliers from time to time—the medical profession might be one of the last to shift entirely to electronics—but mostly my cubby lay empty. Except when I checked it that morning, I had a note.

Written in a masculine scrawl, it read:

Sky,

I tried your strawberry rhubarb pie.

Ate the whole thing in one sitting. I’m not proud of myself.

You should open up your own shop.

Jax

I pressed the note to my chest, eyes closed, almost wanting to breathe in the moment so I could remember the happiness. I’d felt a little silly, going to all that trouble over ingredients and recipes and baking. Apparently he’d gone over to Romi’s and bought himself one of my pies. He’d loved it. And he’d taken the time to tell me and then encourage me to pursue my dream, the one I didn’t even talk about it felt so fragile and unrealistic.

I pictured him sitting in a kitchen, just him and my pie. But maybe he had a girlfriend. My smile fell, my eyes opening. Yeah, he probably had a girlfriend. I shouldn’t read anything special into the note.

My phone buzzed with a text.

Mike: Meet me at the club after work

Right on cue, hearing from Mike stuck yet another pin in my balloon. Which was good. I was married. My husband was reaching out to me, trying to spend time together. That was where I needed to devote my energy. Even if it felt as appealing as pushing a boulder up a mountain.

After my shift, I freshened up quick back at the apartment and pulled on a fitted T-shirt along with some slim jeans and sandals. I’d still look like a nun compared to the girls who hung out with the Skulls, but I wasn’t trying to compete with them, anyway. Some might think I was like an ostrich with its head in the sand, not wanting to know, but as far as I was concerned Mike had married me, not them. He’d made his choice. It wasn’t up to me to police that. Even if I did, I had no illusions that I could change his behavior.

I’d never cheated on Mike, not once. Even though I sometimes wondered whether he could say the same. But in my 24 years I’d already learned the lesson that you couldn’t control what other people did in life. You could only try to stay square with yourself.

Club headquarters was on the outskirts of town in a run-down, nondescript building. I figured the club had the money to fix it up, but that would only draw attention to the spot. They’d had to move locations twice that I knew of in the past three years. I didn’t want to know why. The less I knew about what Mike actually did all day and night, the better I felt about it.

Knocking timidly, no one answered. I rapped again, louder, and a giant the guys all called Tiny showed me in. The place was loud and crowded, filled with faces I didn’t recognize. Tiny grunted at me in welcome and jerked his thumb over toward the bar where I could see Mike drinking with a couple of guys.

Shy, I picked my way through the crowd. Standing behind Mike, about to say hello, I saw something on the bar in front of him. I brought up my hand to cover my mouth. The music and voices were so loud that no one heard me gasp.

It couldn’t be what I thought it was. Because from where I was standing, it looked like a finger laying there on the bar. A bloody human finger, severed off of a hand.

“You’re one sick idiot, Griller.” One of the guys next to him raised his beer bottle in a toast.

“You should have heard him squeal when I cut it off.” My husband laughed. “Like a pig. Bled like one, too.”

“Did he talk?” the guy on his other side asked.

“You know he did.” Mike sounded so proud I half-expected him to beat his chest. “I’m the Griller.”

I spun away, a sickening lurch in my stomach. I needed to get out, get some air. I made it to the door and pushed my way out, leaning against the side of the building for support. My hands on my thighs, head down, I tried to take in big gulps of air. I felt like I might throw up.

I remembered Mike telling me, on more than one occasion, “No one gets away when I grill them.” He bragged about it, how tough he was. How he could get anyone to confess.

Now I knew how he did it. He tortured people. Cut off their fingers. And he enjoyed doing it.

Over at a trash can, I threw up, heaving and crying. Then I wiped my mouth with my shirt, stood up and walked over to our car. The car he usually didn’t let me drive because he never knew when he might need it. Like when he had someone with him he had to torture.

I sat in the car shaking, remembering how awestruck I’d been when I’d first met Mike, amazed and impressed by him and his world. As a teenager, I’d watched TV shows about motorcycle clubs, and read plenty of romances featuring MC guys as the hero. What a dumb, naïve girl I’d been.

Not any more. Even before tonight, I’d seen more and more signs of Mike’s true character. I couldn’t hide from it any longer. My husband was a violent, unbalanced man. If he cut off a guy’s finger and brought it in to show his friends like some kind of a trophy, who knew what he was capable of? He was a monster.

Turning on the ignition, I pulled out, knowing what I needed to do. I had to get away from him. But that would take more than just driving away. That was going to take some planning. Mike wasn’t the kind of guy who just signed divorce papers.

I almost had to pull over to the side of the road and throw up again. But I told myself to toughen up. I had to use my head, be smart.

Step one was making sure I didn’t get pregnant. True, we barely ever had sex, but the last thing I needed was a baby with that maniac. The next day, I promised myself I’d stop by a clinic and get birth control. I’d gone off the pill a year ago when he’d said he wanted to try to have kids, but it was time to go back on. I’d just have to hide them from him. He’d hit the roof if he saw me taking contraceptives.

But I had to start taking them. It would buy me some time. It was just the first step, but it was an important one. Because now I knew with complete certainty, I had to leave him.

4

Jax

More and more, I started looking forward to Mondays. And then I stopped waiting for it to be Monday to visit Ace. I began coming by a couple times a week, bringing him his favorite beer or asking his opinion on something in person instead of over the phone. He had good instincts about people and though he’d never been a business owner himself, he gave great advice about how to deal with my staff at the bar. The fights they got into, the emotional ups and downs, I didn’t get it. But Ace reminded me to be patient, that most people just wanted someone to listen to them. And, when in doubt, a surprise bonus went a long way to keeping everyone happy.

It was a Thursday morning, but I had time to stop by and visit after my workout before I headed to the bar. I washed up, dressed, and bought myself a sandwich at a local shop. I gave my bag of chips to the homeless guy outside. I didn’t know what his backstory was, but I had no illusions about the fact that that could have been me.

I’d been so lucky that Ace had stepped in when he did. At 16, if he hadn’t opened up his doors to me, my whole life could have swung in an entirely different direction. After the accident, I’d basically bounced around like I was in a pinball machine ricocheting off grownups who hated on me in different ways. First, my parents had smacked me around, then teachers and principals yelling about suspension and detention. Then came the officers, police officers, correctional officers, probation officers.

By the time Ace had taken me in, it had seemed as if everyone around me had already decided how my life was going to play out. Ace had been honest. He’d agreed that, to them, I was a done deal. He explained how easy it would be for me to stay on my current path. Just like my father, I could squander my days in and out of prison, ending up with a polluted life, littered with broken relationships.

Only 16, I’d already looked like a six-foot-three tattooed badass with a shaved head and a stare so angry I could practically bore a hole through steel. I’d looked tough on the outside, beyond my years, but on the inside it had stung to know that people looked at me and saw a convicted thief and drug dealer. A big part of me had felt sorely tempted to stick up my middle finger, giving everyone exactly what they wanted. If they wanted a bad guy, I could bring that, rain retribution down on them in epic proportions. Not a problem. At first, it had felt like eating trash not to, like I was sucking it up, playing by their rules while I tried to finish high school, the big guy in the back row older than everyone else.

But Ace had told me that I was smart, and that a diploma, if I could get one, was better than a G.E.D. What was more, he’d told me that the real way to prove everyone wrong would be to channel my anger and actually make something of myself. I needed to carve out my own path, be my own man, earn money without hurting anyone else.

Ace had believed in me when no one else had. I’d spent the last 10-plus years trying to prove him right. Now there I was, a successful business owner, a decade’s worth of a clean record to my name. I had him to thank.

Pulling up at Cavallo Canyon, I was glad I’d been able to talk him into moving there. The man was still spry at 80, but I sure rested easier knowing he had help seconds away. Especially when that help came in the form of Sky.

As I walked down the hall, I heard singing coming out of a room two doors down from Ace. I slowed down to listen. Sure enough, I could tell one of the voices was Sky’s.

“Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue.” The door was open. Quiet, I snuck a glance inside. Sky sat on a couch beside a woman with snow white hair. The two of them were holding hands and singing together. The woman kept stopping and patting Sky’s hand, saying “this is my favorite part.” Sky would nod and smile and they’d start again.

I stood there and watched. Creepy as it may have been to lurk in the hallway and eavesdrop, I couldn’t help it. At the bar and around town, sometimes it seemed like all anyone did was snap and bite at everyone else. Online it was worse, with Twitter trolls and selfies begging “look at me” and vicious attacks on Facebook. Sometimes it seemed like everyone relished taking off their gloves and coming out swinging.

Not Sky, though. At first I’d wondered if I was romanticizing her, idealizing her into the perfect woman. But the more I saw of Sky, the more I liked her. Strolling slowly with a woman in a wheelchair, stopping to have conversations, she seemed to have all the qualities I saw so little of day to day. Kindness. Patience. Sky seemed genuinely nice. And she just happened to also be sexy. Sitting there singing, I couldn’t stop watching as she tilted up her heart-shaped face and moved her lips shaped like Cupid’s bow. Even in those scrubs, I could see her generous curves just made for my touch.

“Hello there, young man!” Uh oh, the elderly woman had spotted me. I tried to slink away. “You there, listening in the hallway,” she called me out. “Don’t be shy! Come on in!”

“Sorry, ma’am.” I took a step in to offer my apologies. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

Sky jumped up when she saw me, turning bright red.

“You’re welcome to sing along!” her older companion assured me. “Do you know the words?”

“Uh, no, can’t say I do.” I took a step back out into the hallway again. “Sorry for disturbing you.”

“I’ll be back in a few hours, Janice,” Sky promised, heading out to join me. Eyes wide, she poked me with her elbow. “What were you doing, spying on us?”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“You were listening to us sing! I can’t believe it.” She brought her hand to her forehead as if she wanted to hide behind it.

“Sky.” I brought my hand to hers, taking it down. She had nothing to be embarrassed about. Only then I was standing and holding her hand, so I dropped it quick. “You don’t have to feel shy. You have a beautiful voice.” I may have been exaggerating, but I couldn’t exactly say what I was thinking, that she was beautiful inside and out.

She burst out laughing. “That’s a lie. I have a terrible voice.”

“You don’t,” I insisted. “I mean, I’m not saying you should quit your job and go audition for The Voice.” She rolled her eyes at me. “But that was so nice in there.”

“She loves that song.” She shrugged.

“It’s a good one.”

We arrived at Ace’s door and I swear I felt like we were at the end of a date, me about to ask her if she wanted to come inside. Or, better yet, lean down, stroke a thumb across her jaw, tilt her head back as I sank down into a kiss. “You want to—?” I began.

“I’ve got to go check on someone.”

“Right.” I nodded, like she’d cut our evening together short instead of telling me she had something she needed to do at work before she could visit my grandfather. I needed my head examined.

“But I’ll stop by in a bit,” she promised.

I watched her walk down the hall, unable to force myself to play it cool. The woman had a glorious rear. I hated that someone else got to touch it instead of me.

“How’s our girl?” Ace asked as I entered. He must have overheard us talking.

“I heard her singing.” I sat down next to him on the couch. Just a couple of guys, both with a big crush on the same woman. Only she flirted right back with Ace.

“‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’ with Janice?” he asked. I nodded. “That Sky’s a catch. I don’t know a thing about her husband, but I’m sure he doesn’t deserve her.”

“He doesn’t.”

“Is that right?”

“That’s right.” I stood up, suddenly feeling restless.

“How’re things at work?”

I shrugged. “Same old.” I gave him a little detail, pacing the room. Then I headed into the bathroom and splashed some water on my face.

Time for a change. I rifled around for some hair clippers in Ace’s vanity. I knew he had a pair. I’d bought them for him to replace the set he’d had since 1956. Running my hand through my short hair, I decided I’d buzz it down. I might even shave my head completely bald. No muss, no fuss.

I liked the feel of the clippers over my skull. Out with the old, in with the new. It was April, springtime, and I felt ready for a fresh start. When I was done, I brushed off my shoulders as best I could and headed out for Ace’s dustpan and broom.

“Get over here! You look like a shorn sheep!” Ace called me to the couch. And look who was sitting next to him. I must not have heard her come in over the buzz of the clippers.

Running my hand along my newly-cropped hair, I asked Sky, “What do you think?”

Nodding shyly, she answered, “I like it.”

“Course she’s going to say she likes it. She’s too polite!” Ace barked. “Turn around. Did you clean it up in back?”

Dutifully, I turned for his inspection. “What a mess!” he declared.

I guess I’d failed. “It’s hard to get the back.” I felt the patches I’d missed with my fingers.

“Help him out, Sky,” Ace told her.

“That’s OK,” I started, but she stood up from the couch. I followed her into the bathroom.

“Here, let me.” She picked up the clippers and clicked them on with a buzz. Standing on her tiptoes, she rested a hand between my shoulder blades and leaned in. I could feel the heat from her palm through my shirt, light and teasing on my back.

I could take my shirt off. I could say it would be easier that way, less mess. Most women seemed to enjoy the sight of me bare-chested. I’d like to watch Sky’s reaction, see if her eyes widened, whether she licked her lips. Would she find excuses to touch me, trace my tattoos and ask what they meant? Press against me, brushing along my shoulders, my back? Or would she get all flustered and shy, pink in the face, her hand shaking as she moved?

I kept my shirt on. She was married. As she touched the clippers to the back of my neck, I could feel her breath on my nape. She stroked where she’d shaved, seeing if it was smooth. Her fingers caressed my skin, while her soft breasts grazed against me. She took her time, paying close attention, moving slowly. Blowing on my neck, she brushed the skin clear with her fingertips.

I shifted slightly, clearing my throat. She had such a sensuality to her. I could feel it in her lingering touch, see it in the way her lips pursed as she blew. The way she moved, gentle, deliberate, taking care, made me think of how well she’d do other things, too. She wouldn’t rush. She’d linger, savoring every touch, stroke and lick.

Our eyes met in the mirror. Standing so close, neither of us moved. All it would take would be a slight turn to my side. Everything could change in an instant as I wrapped her into an embrace. I could almost feel how good it would be to clasp her against me, my arms drawing her in close, her breasts against my chest and fingers clutching at my shoulders as we kissed.

I didn’t move an inch. I stood still, wanting what I couldn’t have, until she announced brightly, “You’re all set!” She set down the clippers, still buzzing, and left the bathroom.

When I followed, she was already opening the door to leave. “It’s room at best temperature,” she called to Ace. She paused, flustered, realizing that wasn’t quite right. “I mean, it’s best at room temperature. Unless you want the pie heated up and then you can put it in the microwave.” Her words came out in a breathy rush. “But only 10 seconds at a time because fruit can heat up unevenly.”

“Thank you for the apple pie. You’re an angel.” Ace walked over and gave her a hug. It made no sense at all that I felt jealous.

“I hope you enjoy it,” she told him.

“Pies from Heaven, that’s what you should call your shop. Jax had the idea you should open your own pie shop. Did he tell you that?”

“He did.” She bit her lower lip, flashing a quick glance at me, then away.

“Sky’s Pies,” I said. “That’s what you should call it.”

Ace laughed and slapped his thigh. “You’ve got it all worked out, Jax.”

It got her to smile, even though she said, “I don’t know about opening my own shop.”

“Why not?” Ace asked. “You know who’s the guy to help you do it.” He pointed straight at me, as subtle as a neon sign. “This guy’s a successful restaurateur.”

After she left, I gave Ace a look. He knew exactly what I was thinking, but he played dumb. “What?” he asked, trying to sound innocent. “Can’t an old man have some fun? What’s the harm if I want to play matchmaker?”

“She’s married, for one.”

“She likes you. Mark my words, she likes you.”

I knew it shouldn’t have made me happy to hear him say that. But it did. Truth was, the thought that Sky might like me made me feel happier than just about anything else had in a long while.

§

I sat back on my leather couch, icing the knuckles on my right hand. There’d been a rough fight at the bar that night, and I’d had to get involved. “Be the bigger man. Don’t just look that way.” That’s what Ace had always told me. Looked like I wasn’t following that advice too well.

In my defense, the man I’d punched had it coming. He’d started things, and taken out a switchblade, so I knew I had to end it, quick. But it was still a trash end to a trash day. I’d gotten a call that morning from my old man. He was back in jail. He’d been picked up for assault and battery down in Florida. It looked like he might be facing seven to ten years. He wanted me to post bail.

Yeah, I’d gotten the message that fists didn’t get you where you wanted in life. But there I was, icing my right one because I’d used it against some guy’s jaw a couple of hours ago. I got myself another beer and put a few new ice cubes in the plastic bag.

“Idiot,” I exhaled, stretching out on the couch, settling the bag on my aching hand. Flicking on the TV, I figured I might not make it into the bedroom. I could sack out there for the night, numbing my hand while I numbed my brain with stupid shows. But my mind still wandered as I channel surfed.

What would Sky have thought of the whole scene? She couldn’t be a complete stranger to violence, married to that husband of hers. But somehow I couldn’t wrap my mind around the two of them as a couple. I couldn’t picture the two of them together.

Maybe there was a lot more to the guy than I’d seen. To be fair, it wasn’t exactly as if Griller and I had had heart-to-hearts. He’d come in to my bar from time to time, and, yeah, I’d seen him getting cozy with other women. I’d learned not to make assumptions, though, so maybe the guy was doing right by Sky. But with a woman like her, what was he doing even flirting with other girls?

If I had Sky as my woman, I’d treat her like a queen. I wouldn’t be able to wait to get home every night. I already thought other women paled in comparison to her, and I hadn’t even ever touched her. It was dangerous that mentally I added a “yet.”

I wasn’t going to touch her, not the next time I saw her, nor the time after that. I wouldn’t do that to her, putting her in that position. Even if I was starting to get the sense that she might not mind if I did. I wasn’t blind. I saw the way she flushed around me. When our eyes had met in the mirror, she’d looked just as heated as me. But feeling something and doing something about it were completely different animals.

I could tell by the way she looked up at me, she thought I was a good person. She thought I was doing right by Ace, like I was helpful and kind. She lit up when I noticed little things about her, or gave her a compliment. It was like she thought I was a good guy. Around her, I felt like one.

Most women seemed to like me for all the wrong reasons. They saw me, big and muscly, riding around on a Harley, and they figured I was the type of badass Hollywood put up on a movie screen. But that kind of badass, all posturing and backtalk, flexing muscles and itching for a fight, that wasn’t me. In my experience, the men who were truly the toughest were quiet about it. They kept an eye on things, only striking if they had to, and then they made sure it was a knockout punch.

I’d punched a man so hard tonight his teeth had rattled. But I didn’t get an adrenaline rush from it. Girls had flocked around me afterwards, wanting to take care of my hand, stroking my bicep as they told me how scared they’d been when the fight broke out. I could have taken any one of them home with me. This girl Nikki had just about hopped on the back of my bike without my even asking. She’d be fun, no questions asked, no strings attached. But I wasn’t interested.

The whole situation was messed up. I’d finally met a girl who liked me for the right reasons. Sky saw and liked the man that I wanted to be. But I couldn’t do anything about it, because trying to get with her and make her cheat on her husband? That was a classic bad guy move.

So there I was, on my couch alone, wanting the one I couldn’t have. Because truth was, more and more, it was Sky and Sky alone on my mind.

§

On Friday, Liam called. He was pretty good about keeping in touch.

“When you coming out?” I asked him, as always. Whenever he came to visit we always had a good time. He was the kind of guy you could introduce to anyone and he’d charm the pants right off them. Especially women.

“Don’t know, man. Maybe this summer.”

“How about the Fourth? Or are you having your party?” Liam still lived on Naugatuck, the island where the four of us had gotten into the accident. Every year he threw a rager, and usually had crazy stories that came out of it. Naugatuck attracted the uber rich and more than one celebrity had made a cameo at Liam’s.

“Don’t know.” He seemed unusually vague, like he had something on his mind.

“You good?” I asked, the male equivalent of letting him know he could tell me anything. I’d known him since we were ten. I could still remember meeting him, the summer both our fathers worked together on a construction site. First thing we’d ever done together was set off a load of illegal firecrackers. Liam was my kind of guy, always up for a good time and in your corner if you ever needed him. It made sense to me that he’d become a firefighter, helping people for a living.

“Yeah, yeah.” He either was good, or didn’t want to tell me about what was bothering him. “How about you? Tommy still giving you a hard time?”

I filled him in on my business partner. I liked being my own boss. I was doing all right for myself, better than I’d ever expected, really, owning my own place. But Tommy and I, going on year four? We had some differences of opinion.

He wanted to cater more toward the MC guys. I wanted to broaden our appeal and our clientele. Right now, the way I saw it a lot of people stayed away from Ace because they saw it as a biker bar. Any given night about half the patrons might be Skulls. That created an atmosphere, the kind of one where fights broke out.

The way Tommy saw it, we had built-in clientele. They had money, they stayed loyal, so why not play it up? He wanted to put up some chrome handlebars and headlights on the wall, get a few framed black and whites of vintage Harleys, maybe play with our logo to make it biker-friendly.

So far, we’d been managing to have a professional, if tense, back-and-forth over it. Sometimes he’d make a move, naming a new drink special the Ape Hanger (for the high handlebars on some custom bikes) or the Brain Bucket (a helmet). Then I’d target the local Cal State college crowd, doing a $1 drink happy hour during their basketball team’s big game and showing it on all our TVs.

“I don’t know man,” I concluded. “Sooner or later, something’s going to have to give.” I had a feeling that something would be me, and the giving would take the form of my leaving the partnership.

“You should move out here,” Liam suggested. “Open up a place on the island.”

I had to admit, it wasn’t a bad idea. We said our goodbyes and I sat down at the kitchen table, taking out a plate, a fork, and what had become my favorite food: one of Sky’s pies. This one was blueberry. What that woman did with crust, fruit and sugar was nothing short of magic.

I bet she’d taste even sweeter. I’d take my time, licking and sucking. She’d be slick like honey on my tongue. I’d feast on her all night.

Shoving the remaining pie back in the fridge, I pulled on my jacket and made myself head out to a party I’d been invited to. I needed to stay busy. It had been far too long since I’d been with a woman. I should distract myself, not get lost in fantasies. That only led to trouble.

§

A few weeks passed before I saw Sky again. I immersed myself in work, only visiting Ace on Monday afternoons. It wasn’t until mid-May that what I’d been thinking about but trying not to think about happened. I was sitting there with Ace, watching some show and shooting the trash, when Sky walked in.

Both Ace and I rose, welcoming her. She looked gorgeous, her chestnut hair down, thick and glossy, those plump lips curving into a smile as she greeted us. I’d never found scrubs sexy, but on her they tantalized, revealing little but promising so much.

She only stayed for a few minutes. She seemed flustered, looking everywhere but me. Ace scolded her for working too hard. He said she’d been taking other aide’s shifts.

“Only when they need me to,” she demurred. “Kaye’s daughter’s been sick. And Maria went on vacation.”

“I know, I just worry about you,” Ace insisted.

“That’s my job,” she teased. “I’m supposed to be worrying about you.”

She left, explaining she had a lot she had to attend to that afternoon. I left about a half hour later. On the way out, I passed by a supply room. The door ajar, I saw Sky inside folding sheets.

I paused, knowing I shouldn’t, but still wanting to anyway. Wanting won out. I rapped lightly on the door as I stood in the entrance. “How’s it going?”

She jumped, hand to her chest. “You startled me.”

“Sorry, wasn’t trying to. You need a hand?” I grabbed a sheet before she could say no. She had a pile in front of her.

“You don’t have to.” But that mountain in front of her was huge. “We send the linens out with a laundry service. But it’s only once a week and that’s not enough, so I do extra loads for residents. They need it, but it takes a lot of time.”

“That’s thoughtful of you.”

She shrugged, like she didn’t think it was anything special. I got the impression she thought that of herself as well. From where I stood, I saw a whole lot she could brag about if she wanted.

I helped her, taking sheet corners. We met in the middle, our hands brushing against each other as we exchanged sides, bringing the sheet together into increasingly smaller folds. It felt intimate, as if the sheets were ours, from the bed we shared night after night. I’d want Sky to sleep naked so I could reach for her at all hours, feel her soft curves against my skin.

Clearing my throat, I tried to steer my mind onto safer subjects. “So, what kind of pies are you baking this week?”

“Not sure yet.” She started rattling off options, clearly excited about the prospects. I could feel the light brush of her hair as she bent down to pick up another sheet. I could see the flush on her cheeks, sense the way her hands shook slightly as my fingers grazed along them. I shouldn’t be so aware. I shouldn’t even be in there with her. But there was should and there was reality.

“You going to get some ideas from YouTube?” I asked.

She smiled. “You remembered.”

Of course I remembered how she’d told me she learned to bake. I remembered everything about her. “I know you’re not going to call your mom for a recipe.”

That made her laugh. Without any bitterness, she agreed that her mother had never cooked or baked a day in her life. “She wasn’t so interested in the homemaker stuff. Cooking, cleaning, caretaking. Baking was my rebellion.”

“No smoking in the girls’ room?” I teased. “Just making apple pie?”

“I thought about a nose ring.”

“Did you?” I could not picture one on her.

“Not really,” she confessed. “I’ve never been that edgy.”

“That’s all right. I like you just the way you are.” We folded in silence. I wondered if I should have said that, but it was out there now. Besides, I meant it. “So, your mom, was she around much when you were growing up?” I didn’t get the sense of a close-knit family.

“Nope.”

“How about your dad?”

She gave me a smile, not seeming to mind but pointing out, “You’re giving me the third degree here.”

“Just trying to get to know you,” I answered honestly, brushing aside for the moment whether I should be doing that or not. I wanted to, end of story.

“My father stuck around when I was little, but he hasn’t been in the picture for a long time. He wasn’t so into the domestic life either, I guess. No idea where I got that gene from.” She blushed, then shook her head. “OK, now that I’ve shared all that personal stuff, it’s your turn.” Her eyes sparkled with enjoyment, clearly relishing turning the tables on me. “Tell me your darkest secret.”

She was teasing. She didn’t really mean for me to tell her my darkest secret. But there in the supply room, standing so close, I wanted to.

“I still feel guilty about my friend Ian. He got injured because of me. He’ll never walk again.”

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry.” She dropped the sheet and brought her hands to mine. I looked down at them, wanting to take them in my own. But she dropped hers, quick. “I mean…” She took a step back, clearing her throat. “What happened?”

Standing there, I told her all about it. “We were young and stupid, only 14. Four of us stole a boat. It never occurred to us that heading out a few hours before sunset on a boat we didn’t how to operate might not be such a smart idea.”

“Oh goodness.”

“Have you ever been out on the water in a sudden storm?

“No, never.”

“I never had been, either. I hope I never am again.” I shook my head remembering. It had been the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen. “It was like a huge white wall of water hit us.”

“I can’t even imagine.”

I didn’t stop to think, wonder why I was telling her things I never talked about with anybody. Barely anyone in my life other than the guys who’d been in the accident with me even knew it had happened. But I told Sky everything.

“Liam tied himself to a life raft and dove down after Chase got knocked off. He saved Chase’s life, like a hero. And Chase? You’ve probably heard of him. He went on to swim in the Olympics. Chase Carter?”

“Yeah, Chase Carter was on the boat with you?”

I nodded. “Random, I know, but back then he was just a gawky kid I hung out with.” By now I was used to that kind of surprised and impressed reaction about my knowing Chase. To me, he was still the intense, introverted kid I’d met back in the day, prone to double-strapping his backpack and pulling his athletic socks all the way up to his knees. But he’d channeled all of his focused drive into an incredible swimming career, actually taking home a bundle of Olympic medals.

As for me? That night when the boat had split in two, all I’d done was try to hang on and not drown.

“After Chase and Liam went over, it was just me and Ian on the boat. A mast fell on him. I tried to make it over, but I couldn’t get there. The flames were...” I motioned with my hands, remembering what it had been like, the fire engulfing, swallowing. I still woke up sometimes with my heart pounding, sweaty, remembering all the blackness and choking smoke, how even over the howl of the wind and the crash of the waves I could hear Ian’s screams.

“I still have nightmares about it. I should have done more.” I looked down, suddenly wondering what the heck I was doing telling Sky this story.

“Jax, you were 14, in the middle of a storm on a burning, sinking boat.” She stepped closer, bringing her soft, warm hand to my forearm. “It sounds like it’s a miracle you survived at all.”

“I don’t know why I just told you all that.” I ran my hand over the top of my head, partially to stop myself from reaching out to touch her. “I don’t know what got into me. I never talk about it. I’m sorry.” She stood so close I could smell her musky rose scent.

“No, I’m glad you did.” She swept her fingers across my shoulder, giving me a light caress. I was sure she meant it to be soothing, but it had the opposite effect.

“It doesn’t sound like there was anything you could do. You’re a good man, Jax. I know you are. I see you with Ace. Don’t beat yourself up over something that happened so long ago.”

Standing there with her, the understanding in her eyes, the comfort in her touch, I felt better about it all than I had in a long time. “Thanks, Sky.”

“Thank you for talking to me.”

The fact that I didn’t lean down and kiss her, take her juicy lips and capture them with mine? That was some superhuman resistance right there. I stood, so close to leaning down, reaching out, pressing her against me, burying myself in her. But somehow I held back.

“Oh, I have to show you!” she exclaimed suddenly, dipping down to grab her phone out of her bag. “I got the greatest picture of Ace the other day.” She scrolled through her photos. I wanted to see them all, have her tell me about them. Maybe they’d be of Griller and that would cure me of this growing obsession once and for all. If I stood next to her and heard her gush over her husband, maybe I’d get it through my thick skull that I couldn’t touch her.

But maybe they wouldn’t be of Griller. Maybe they’d be of things she liked and people she knew and I’d learn more about her, discover more about what made her smile, what she enjoyed, what made her tick. I wanted to know everything.

“Look, isn’t that so Ace?” She turned to me, showing me a perfect photo of him smiling with a couple of his lady friends. At 80, the man had a twinkle in his eye and a spring in his step. He knew he was all that.

“You really captured him,” I agreed. “Can you send that to me?”

“Sure, I just need your number.”

“Here.” I took her phone from her and created a new contact, adding my address in as well. I enjoyed the fact that she’d be able to get in touch with me, and me with her, way too much.

No sheets were left to fold. I had no reason to be there, other than that I liked being close to her. I guessed I had to say good-bye.

As she reached to put the phone back in her bag, her sleeve pulled up a bit, revealing her wrist. She had two angry, dark bruises, one on each side. I knew what made those kinds of bruises: a mean clamp around the wrist from someone bigger and stronger.

Every muscle in my body tensed, my hands balling into fists. Who had done that to her? Was it her husband? Was that rat mongrel laying a hand on her? I could feel a cold sweat of rage forming on my brow and I must have been scowling with fury because she looked up at me and asked, “Are you all right?”

“Who did that to your wrist?” I didn’t mean to be so blunt, to show all my emotion in my voice, but I was nearly shaking with anger at the thought that someone had hurt her.

“What? No, no one.” Self-consciously, she pulled her sleeve down, covering the bruises. “I bumped myself.”

I swallowed, trying to tamp down the rage. No one bumped themselves like that, in perfectly matching circles on either side of their wrist bone. No, that happened when someone grabbed you with too much force. I’d had those marks on me from my dad when I was a kid, and I’d seen them on my mom, too, before she left him. It brought out all kinds of repressed, vengeful fury I wanted to rain down on her oppressor.

“So, thanks for helping me. It was nice talking to you.” Now she wasn’t meeting my eyes. “I’ve got to get back to my rounds.” She brushed by me to scoot out the door, and I almost caught her before she left. But there was a chance I’d have too much emotion in it, might grab her too hard. And it wasn’t my place to feel that protective of her, to want to keep her safe and see that nothing bad ever happened to her again. So I watched her leave, walking down the hall without me, wondering how the heck I was going to get her off my mind now.

The answer was, I couldn’t. I lasted two days. Then, that night, standing in the middle of my crowded bar with all sorts of problems that should have been enough to distract me, I gave in. I sent her a text. It wasn’t too late, only around nine o’clock. I hoped what I wrote was innocent enough.

Jax: Did you bake anything tonight?

A minute later, I got back a photo of a pie. It looked incredible, golden and succulent. I could imagine Sky baking, dusted head to toe with flour, smiling as she worked. She’d look so freaking sweet. Any man would be so lucky to come home to her. But I bet her husband was out and he wasn’t alone.

Jax: Are you baking right now?

I got back another photo, this one taken from an angle to show an apron, what looked like flour-dusted sweatpants and then her bare feet. Her toenails were hot pink. I’d had a lot of women send me sexy photos of themselves. Over the years, my phone had lit up with everything from women in hot dresses or lingerie right on up to buck naked and touching themselves. But none of those photos had turned me on half as much as that photo of Sky in sweatpants and an apron. I could picture coming home to her, how sweet she’d taste, some sugar mixed in with the kiss.

All sorts of replies ran through my mind, and not a single one of them could I send. I couldn’t tell her that I bet she’d taste even better than that pie. I couldn’t tell her I’d be over later to help her wash off all that flour in a long bath. So, all I said was:

Jax: Looks like I’m stopping by Romi’s tomorrow.

She sent back a smiley face emoji.

That night, when I got home I took a shower. I remembered how she’d smelled when we’d folded sheets, her supple curves hinted at in her scrubs. Her round, perfect rear when she’d bent down to get her phone.

I’d wanted to lock that supply room door. I could have pressed her against the wall and made her gasp, devouring her with my kisses. I could have kissed her breathless, stripped off that top and licked and sucked on those gorgeous breasts until she panted, fingers clawing at my shoulders, arms, chest. I wanted to hear her moan, wanted to see those lips part in pleasure. I needed to see her look up at me drugged with desire, wanting everything I had to give to her.

Stroking my cock, I closed my eyes and imagined if I’d slipped my fingers under her waistband and slid down her panties. In real life, she’d surely tell me to stop, remind me that she wasn’t mine, maybe smack me across the face for good measure. But this wasn’t real life, this was my fantasy surrounded by the hot steam of the shower, in the privacy of my home.

In my fantasy, she was wet for me, so wet as I stroked her slick pussy. Her moans grew more fevered, more needy as I worked her, just like I worked myself, faster, more demanding, hurtling toward the climax we both craved. I could almost hear her cry out my name as she came on my fingers, shaking and calling out for me. Just like I came with her name on my lips, shooting out my cum, eyes closed, lost to the fantasy that I knew could never happen in real life.

5

Sky

During the month of June, the sun shone bright like it always did in L.A. Only this month it seemed even brighter. The flowers bloomed with more color than ever. The birds chirped just for me, twittering away like I was Snow White and we spoke each other’s happy woodland language.

I knew what was going on, but I didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want it to be so, but that didn’t change the fact that the joy welling up and threatening to burst out through my chest had everything to do with a certain man I still only saw a few times a month. But Jax and I were starting to talk much more frequently than that. The text messages between us started off slow, but the pace picked up, more and more to say to each other with each passing week.

The charge I got when my phone sounded from a new text was like taking a hit of crack. Not that I’d ever taken crack. But it was definitely an adrenaline rush, a high that made me guilty and excited and thrilled, soaring up to the clouds to know he was thinking about me and checking in, sharing something from his day and asking about mine.

We never crossed any lines. He never asked me what kind of underwear I had on. I never told him I dreamed about him at night. But we also never talked about Mike, or any women in his life.

I hated that thought, but there had to be women in his life. No man who looked like Jax could possibly be either single or celibate. He looked like he could star in an action movie, right at home in combat fatigues leading a daring rescue. Or he could be a down-on-his luck boxer who needed the faith of a good woman by his side to help him become heavyweight champion of the world.

Yes, I had an over-active imagination, but I wasn’t imaging how attentive Jax was. He remembered little things about my day, like how the bus I took to work was always either late or early. He’d send me a message right when I was supposed to be getting to work asking, “Which one was it today?” He knew I was always filling in for other people’s shifts, the sub on standby should anyone ever want time off. Jax would tell me to take care of myself, reminding me how many shifts I’d worked in the past week. Which meant he was keeping count, looking out for me.

I literally felt like I was glowing all over when I got a text from him. Like if you turned out the lights, I’d provide my own luminescence. I knew it was dangerous, but I told myself it was a harmless friendship. Nothing had happened between us, not even in words.

But I knew how much I wanted it to become more than that. The power of my attraction to him grew every day. I understood that I might be experiencing Romeo and Juliet syndrome, the thrill of the forbidden calling to me, making me want what I couldn’t have. But I’d never been prone to that before. I’d been with Mike for three and a half years. I’d never even looked at another man, and not just because I knew Mike would kill me and the guy if I did.

Now I knew I wasn’t speaking figuratively. It was literal. If Mike had cut off some guy’s finger and laughed about it, keeping the digit as a souvenir and showing it off around the bar with his friends, what would he do if he had a personal vendetta? If he thought I had cheated on him? He’d kill me. I knew it with certainty.

Each time he got rough with me now, I didn’t try to explain it away or excuse it. I let myself acknowledge how much it hurt on so many levels, and I used it to steel my resolve. I needed to get away. That was the real reason I said yes to every extra shift. I squirreled away each and every extra cent I made, withdrawing it in cash in regular intervals and hiding it in a backpack I kept balled up in the back of a closet. Mike never scrutinized our monthly spending as long as nothing caught his eye on our joint bank balance or credit cards. As long as the numbers looked about what he expected them to be, he didn’t ask any questions. I hoped that stayed the same for another few months. I figured I could have enough saved by then to put down first and last on an apartment somewhere. I hadn’t figured out where yet, or how to prevent Mike from tracing where I fled. But I’d figure that out. I had to.

And I had to do it before I did anything stupid. There was only so long a situation could heat up before it boiled over. Last month when Jax and I had folded sheets in the supply room, it had almost happened. That day, the two of us standing close, doing something so domestic and strangely intimate together, him trusting me enough to share a painful story from his past, it had taken all the willpower and self-restraint I possessed to tell him I had to go. I’d had to force myself away from him, use all my strength to walk out the door and down the hallway. All I’d wanted was to drop that sheet and throw my arms around him, lick his neck, lift up his shirt and trail my fingers down every chiseled, muscular inch.

I’d have shocked him, I was sure. He knew I was married. I wore the ring. He even knew Mike. Ace Bar wasn’t his favorite, but Mike went there from time to time. And besides that, I knew I wasn’t the type of woman Jax would go for. He was so hot I bet he turned heads when he walked around, women losing their balance and spilling their drinks as they saw him stroll by. He probably caused traffic accidents by crossing the street.

As for me? I’d never stood out in a crowd. I looked fine, but nothing special with my mousy brown hair and pale skin and a few extra pounds on my hips and thighs. Jax was probably just being nice to me, grateful that I was nice to his grandfather. Not every elderly relative got treated right. He was probably just putting in some time with me as a thank you for doing right by Ace.

But sometimes I admitted to myself that it didn’t feel that way. It felt like we liked each other, in that charged, special way when you knew the attraction was mutual. When Jax looked at me, it was like his mouth watered at the sight. He made me feel like I was gorgeous and desirable and everything I’d pretty much never felt with another man.

Sure, Mike had been into me at first. But he’d never ravished me the way men did in romance novels. He’d never made me feel like he couldn’t get enough of me. Occasionally, at first, he’d told me I looked hot in my jeans, so I should take them off. Sex with Mike was always quick and to the point. And sex with Mike was all the sex I’d had.

The truth was, I’d never had an orgasm with a man. I’d become fairly skilled at giving them to myself, but my couple of boyfriends during my teen years hadn’t done the deed. And Mike? Even when we’d had sex, it was a one-and-done type of deal. That one was always him, never me.

What would it be like with Jax? His hands were so big. The way he looked at me, I could imagine him down between my legs, doing all sorts of things that made me drunk with pleasure. When it was just me, late at night, alone in bed, I could lose myself to fantasies. Mike was never around anymore. I didn’t know where he was spending his nights, and I didn’t care. I knew he was probably with another woman. From my perspective, that was perfect. It kept him distracted, buying me time to save up money so I could leave. And it gave me the space I wanted to dream about Jax.

I did it every night, twisting up the sheets as I touched myself. Sometimes with my fingers, sometimes with my vibrator, I lost myself in fantasy, imagining all the ways he and I could find ourselves alone. What if the bus ran late and he happened to be driving by? Or what if he happened to leave Ace’s apartment at the same time as my shift ended? He’d offer me a ride, and there we’d be, just the two of us, surrounded by the growing darkness outside as we shared the cab of his truck. Sitting that close, with him so huge, we’d brush against each other, his arm against my breast, my knee against his thigh. I could smell him, watch the Adam’s apple bob in his throat as he swallowed, lean over and give him a hug to thank him and say goodbye. Only once I was pressed against him, maybe we wouldn’t say goodbye after all.

But I had to try to tamp all that down when I actually saw him in person. It wasn’t easy. I was sure I gave away all the telltale signs of intense attraction, blushing, flushing, practically blooming whenever I saw him. One time he’d slid his hand along my lower back, guiding me along in the hallway. I’d had to close my eyes it felt so good. My nipples had stiffened, with a shiver down my spine and a throb right between my legs. He had to know the effect he had on me.

As much as I hoped that he never found out, I fantasized that he did. By myself, in the bath, I’d slip a finger down and imagine it was his. What if he cornered me somewhere no one could see? In the empty staff room, a back stairwell, a supply closet, I could picture him wrapping me in his arms, kissing me, telling me he couldn’t hold back anymore.

I might try to do the right thing and tell him I didn’t want him. But what if he listened to the signals of my body instead? What if he slid his large, powerful hand down where he shouldn’t? Imagining one of his thick, rough fingers sliding along my pussy, discovering how wet he made me, I’d moan, almost hearing the groan he’d make in his throat, the hiss of his breath as he found out, without a doubt, what he did to me. Then I’d have no choice. I’d have to surrender to the floodtide of arousal building inside me, growing more impossible to fight each day. No more pretending, no more hiding, he’d know I wanted him so much it kept me awake at night. That moment of discovery, when it all came tumbling down around us, always made me cum. And as I shuddered and trembled and cried out his name it was always his fingers that I fantasized were deep inside of me.

But that couldn’t happen. So when I caught a glimpse of Jax walking in to visit Ace one afternoon in late June, I forced myself to do all my other rounds first before I checked in on Ace. That way, I could at least feel like I hadn’t run straight to Jax. Even if I wanted to do exactly that.

When I finally walked in, Jax was fastening a button on Ace’s shirt. Ace batted him away as I arrived, probably a little embarrassed that he was getting help. But my heart melted for them both, Ace for the difficulties of aging, struggling with shaking hands. And with Jax, it honestly killed me to see him standing there looking like such a muscled badass, but having the patience and gentleness to button up his grandfather’s shirt.

I’d promised myself I’d play it cool next time I saw him. That plan failed instantly.

“It’s so good to see you both!” I gushed, walking over, barely restraining myself from giving them both big hugs.

“Just who we wanted to see!” Ace announced. “We’re going for a walk. Join us.”

Who was I to say no? It was a gorgeous day, sunny and cheerful. The rays felt glorious on my skin and we wove our way slowly around the courtyard. I didn’t know if Ace was doing it on purpose, but he kept leaving Jax and me alone together as he chatted with other residents. It felt like he was purposely giving us time to spend on our own. Something about it felt like an old-fashioned courtship, strolling along the manor as our chaperone discretely engaged in conversation while keeping a watchful eye. Yes, I’d read some regency romances. And not just to the residents at Cavallo Canyon Retirement Community.

I had to admit, there was something to old-fashioned courtships. Without the opportunity to jump each other like wild, sweaty beasts, Jax and I were forced to get to know each other. Over the last few weeks, between texts and a few visits, I’d been learning about his daily life, including all the challenges of running a bar that catered to a pretty rough crowd.

“How was your night last night?” I asked.

“Lots of beards.”

“Excuse me?”

“They’re popular now, you know? Practically every guy in the bar had one.” He glanced at me, stroking his chin. “What do you think about beards?

“Not the hugest fan,” I admitted. Personally, I figured Jax could pull off anything he wanted. But in general, beards were a no for me.

“It’s funny to see some skinny college hipster wearing boots, a flannel and a beard sitting next to a Skull in the exact same thing.”

I laughed, picturing it. He looked at me like he was memorizing my face, my smile. “How about you?” he asked. “How’s your day going so far?”

“I sang ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’ three times. I may never be able to listen to that song again.” I told him a little more about my rounds. But then, in the sunshine, feeling playful, I turned to him. “So tell me. If you could pick any place in the world, where would you open up a bar?”

“Hmm, anywhere in the world…” He ran a hand over his head as he contemplated my question. I’d noticed he had a habit of doing that, especially when he’d shaved it. I loved it when he did that. It made him look so impossibly badass. Then again, I also loved it when he let his hair grow short and cropped like a military man. I had a feeling he’d look hot no matter what he did. I didn’t really care what he did with his hair, what I wanted was to get the chance to run my hands all over it the way he got to do. That was how bad I had it. I was jealous of his hands.

“On an island,” he decided, giving me a grin. “Somewhere people are on vacation. So they’re in a good mood, not looking to get in a fight.”

“Sounds great to me.” I could picture myself enjoying something fruity and fun at his bar, letting the island breeze blow through my hair.

“How about you?” He elbowed me, and even that made me all weak in the knees. “Do you want to open your pie shop next to my bar?”

I smiled and blushed. That was the thing about Jax. I didn’t even need to tell him about my dream of owning and operating my own pie shop, because I didn’t have to. He talked about it like he knew that was what I should do, that clearly I was good enough and it would be a huge success.

“You should put a picture of yourself on the box,” he teased. Only he didn’t sound like he was entirely joking.

“That’s a terrible idea.” I had to laugh, running a self-conscious hand along my ponytail. Strands had come loose. I was barely wearing any make up. A photo of me on the pie box would probably frighten people away.

“It’s a great idea,” he insisted. “But that’s not your style, is it? We could get someone to draw up a graphic of you instead. In that apron I saw in the photo you sent, with the lace around the edge.”

I knew I was blushing again. He was so full of compliments, and so freaking attentive. How did he remember a detail of my apron from a text I’d sent him over a month ago? It was almost as if he’d looked at it more than once.

I noticed a bit of something on his sleeve. Without thinking, I reached over and dusted it off, my hand brushing slowly over his bicep. I could feel him flex as I touched him, and I drew my hand back as if I’d been bitten.

Heart racing, senses on overload, guilt and arousal all mixing into a heady cocktail, I stammered, “You had something on you.”

“Yeah?” His voice sounded husky and low.

I just nodded, afraid mine would come out sounding the same. He’d felt even better than I’d imagined, all hot and hard. I swallowed and bit my lip. I devoted a lot of energy to not touching him, not letting my emotions show, but one second with my guard down and I’d basically copped a feel.

Those pecs. He didn’t show off wearing muscle Ts, but I could tell he was cut. His shoulders were huge. I knew I shouldn’t compare the two, but Mike was like a gorilla, all big and thick but no definition. He was starting to get a belly. I didn’t care about the belly, not really. I figured if you were in a relationship for the long haul you couldn’t get attached to eight-pack abs. They wouldn’t stay around forever. But somehow Mike’s gut seemed symbolic. It reminded me of how drunk he got every night, not caring for himself, never mind caring for me.

But Jax? The man clearly took good care of himself. I bet he worked out a lot, ate right. He couldn’t get drunk every night and still be the successful owner of a bar, could he? Maybe I was romanticizing him. I was too mixed up to know anymore. My pheromones were wreaking havoc with my capacity for rational thought, yanking my brain around like a hyperactive kid dragging his parents from ride to ride at an amusement park.

Ace joined us again, walking slowly. Sometimes he used a cane, but I’d noticed he preferred not to. Today he didn’t have one, and I watched as Jax kept watch over him, offering a subtle hand to Ace’s elbow when he looked unsteady. Jax never did so much as to embarrass Ace, just enough to keep him going strong.

I held back a sigh. He was so good with his grandpa. I bet he’d be an amazing father. Did he want a family some day? I knew he didn’t have kids. He probably had women in his life, but if he had kids that would have come up.

The question was on the tip of my tongue, “Do you want kids?” But I managed to stop myself from asking it. I was pretty sure the longing in my voice would communicate my silent hope, “With me?”

After another minute or so, I tore myself away to get back to all of my other work obligations. But I couldn’t stop smiling. I felt so high from our time together it was as if I were drifting on a cloud.

When I waltzed into the staff room and saw Maria, I nearly sang my hello, filled to the brim with happiness. Then I checked my phone.

Mike: Meet me at the club after work.

Oh trash. I remembered what I saw the last time I’d met him at the club after work. I needed to come up with an excuse so I didn’t have to set foot in there again.

“Who died?” Maria asked.

“What?” I looked up, confused.

“You look like you just got bad news. You walked in all happy and now you look like you’re going to cry.”

“No.” I wiped my eye, definitely not about to cry. That would be ridiculous. “Mike wants me to meet him after work.”

“So, let me get this straight.” Maria crossed her arms against her chest, looking me in the eye. It was just her and me in the staff room, and I could tell she was about to say something blunt. “You hear from your husband and you look like you’ve just gotten a message from the grim reaper. But when you’re out walking around the courtyard with that smoking hot guy I’ve seen you with a few times, you glow like a 1000-watt bulb.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Unable to meet her eye, I tucked my phone back into my purse. Dang, was I that obvious?

“Yeah, you’re that obvious,” she answered my unspoken question. I closed my eyes, now decidedly very close to crying. Maria was nice, though. She rubbed my back a couple times and said kind-of quiet, “You know, not all marriages are meant to last.”

I couldn’t speak, too overwhelmed with emotion to say a word.

“What were you, 20 when you got married?”

“21,” I whispered.

“A baby.” Maria rubbed my back, the way you would do to a child. I felt as helpless as one. “One choice you make when you’re so young shouldn’t have to ruin your whole life.”

§

Maria’s words stayed with me over the next few weeks. From an objective sense, I could see her point. To her, I was just a kid with all kinds of opportunities and choices, my whole life ahead of me.

To me? I felt trapped. The money wasn’t exactly piling in, but if I left Mike I needed enough cash to stay off the radar for a while. He’d go looking for me. I knew he would. I’d never lived outside of California, but I’d visited my mother when she’d liven in Phoenix for a couple years. I figured if I saved up enough I could go there and live quiet, off the grid, using cash for a few months until he stopped hunting me down.

Because he would hunt me down. Not even because he wanted me around. Because he thought he owned me.

With such a grim reality, Jax became my escape, even more than before. Our texting stayed firmly in the friend zone, checking in on each other’s days, sending snapshots of a pretty sunset (me) or a ridiculous bumper sticker (Jax), but the connection started meaning more and more to me with every passing day.

One night, I felt a mild tremor. Growing up in California, I’d experienced a bunch of earthquakes. But did anyone ever really get used to the feeling of the earth moving? It didn’t cause me to panic, but, still, it felt good to get a text asking how I was doing. Not from my husband, of course.

Jax: You OK? Did you feel the quake?

Sky: Yeah, I’m OK. You?

Jax. Good. Where are you, your apartment?

Sky: Yes. All tucked into bed.

Jax: In your jammies?

Sky: If you call an old T-shirt jammies.

I looked down at myself and giggled. I definitely was not dressed like any man’s fantasy. The shirt had to be at least six years old. I’d been given it as a freebie from a place where I used to work. It had a hole in the armpit and a stain on the back.

Jax: I bet you look cute.

I burst out laughing.

Sky: Shows what you know. I definitely do not.

Jax: Text me a photo and I’ll be the judge.

My heart beat rapidly in my chest. These were definitely the most flirtatious texts we’d exchanged, drawing closer than ever to crossing a line. I bit my lip, trying to figure out what to do.

He wanted a photo? Part of me wanted to change into a sexy little camisole, do my hair and makeup and strike an alluring pose. But then he could tell I was trying. And I shouldn’t be trying. I didn’t feel married to Mike anymore. We’d barely exchanged two words in the past week. But the fact remained that I was still married to him. I could excuse all of Jax and my texting when it stayed between friends. But once we got into sending each other sexy photos? That was different.

And maybe it would be better if I sent him a selfie of the real me, my freshly-washed face all blotchy and shiny, my hair in a messy tumble as I wore a legitimately ugly, old T-shirt. Maybe that would scare him off. As much as I hated the thought, I knew it would make things simpler.

I clicked, forced myself not to stress over how I looked in the photo, and sent it. Soon after, my phone lit up.

Jax: You’re so beautiful, Sky.

Tears filled my eyes, my hand up to my mouth. What was this man doing to me? All he saw me in were scrubs, and now I sent him a photo of me in my most dis-assembled, unvarnished state and he thought I was beautiful? It almost felt like too much.

Sky: Goodnight

I had to end it. I felt too raw, too vulnerable. He couldn’t have any idea how much his brief messages affected me. But inside, I felt like something was changing. As if nothing would ever be the same again.

§

A week later, I was waiting for the bus to head home. I’d gotten there late, or it had left early. Either way, I had a good half hour on my hands. It was already dark. I’d filled in for another aide, letting her go home early while I stayed until nine.

Jax sent me a text and I let him know what I was up to, so exciting, ha ha. I guess I shouldn’t have been too surprised when he pulled up in his truck. But I felt shocked.

“Let me give you a ride home.” He got out and walked around to open the passenger side door for me. Holy hell.

I thanked him. We didn’t say much as we drove through the city streets. I gave him directions and he followed them as we sat so close in the darkness of the cab. I felt too hyper-aware of him to talk, all my fantasies blending with reality. I could feel the heat radiating from his massive body and I breathed him in, like leather and mint and something uniquely male. Being that close to him made me feel drunk.

I’d changed into a skirt after work, nothing too short but it rode up on my legs as I sat. I knew I should pull it down. But I left it there, the hem hitting me high up on my thighs. His eyes darted over to my legs, noticing, his gaze roving over my skin. I crossed my legs, shifting in my seat. He watched me move.

As we pulled onto my street, he asked, “Which one’s yours?” His voice had a low, gravelly pitch that made my stomach flip.

“The gray one.” I pointed to it. “There on the second floor, that’s my bedroom.” I didn’t say our bedroom, as in me and Mike’s. It was my bedroom, where I slept alone and longed for him.

He parked and turned toward me, stretching a powerful arm along the back of my seat. “All right, then.” He looked into my eyes. I did not want to get out of that truck. I wanted to reach my hand to his strong jaw, lean up, press my lips to his and find out how he tasted. I wanted him to start driving and not stop until we were far, far away and we’d never look back.

But that was the sort of thing that happened in movies, not real life. And even in movies, that kind of dramatic escape didn’t usually work out too well. The lovers always ended up in a car wreck or a shootout. So I gave him a quick “thanks” and scooted away, flashing a brief wave and a smile as I unlocked the door and hurried inside.

Up in my bedroom, though, I wasn’t such a good girl. Mike was out again, as usual. I was alone, the bed all to myself.

I stripped down, a fever running through my body. I needed some sweet relief to the tension I felt building, more and more each day. Sheets pulled aside, I lay down, sliding my fingers along my bare skin. Jax made me so aware of my body, like I was charged through with an electric pulse. My head turned to the side, I closed my eyes so I could see him.

I pictured his masculine profile as he drove me home, his bicep flexing as he palmed the wheel. Dipping my fingers down where I ached, I stroked my pussy, already so slick with arousal. The way he’d watched my thighs, his gaze returning over and over to my skin. What if he’d dropped his hand, slowly grazed it up my legs, brought it right where I had my fingers now?

I’d love crying out his name, letting him know how wet he made me, how crazy I felt around him. I wanted him to pull over in his truck, somewhere dark and private so I could straddle him. He’d fill me so deep, thrusting up strong and rough, making me scream and sweat and beg for more. The thought of him cumming inside me, hot and hard and full, sent me over the edge. I convulsed, grabbing a fistful of sheets, crying out into my pillows as I came on my fingers. I could almost hear his voice, him calling out as he came inside me, my name on his breath just like his was on mine.

6

Jax

Griller gave me a nod as I walked past him at my bar. He knew I was the owner, nothing more, nothing less. I forced myself to keep a neutral face and return the nod. But I wanted to bash him in the head.

The man was sitting there with a skank on his lap, his hand up her skirt as she laughed and pushed her belly into his chest. I’d seen him a couple of times at my bar over the last few weeks with the same girl. It was all I could do to steer clear of them. They weren’t causing a scene, leaving their bill unpaid, or anything else I could legitimately frame as a problem. They weren’t doing anything that was any of my business.

But it drove me crazy. He had to be a madman to be out cheating on Sky. With a woman like her as his wife, what was he doing out with anyone else, let alone a woman who couldn’t hold a candle to Sky? Her lipstick was too bright. She was trying too hard. She had none of Sky’s easy grace and charm, none of her feminine softness.

Did Sky have any idea Griller was cheating on her? I knew it wasn’t exactly unheard of. The brothers in motorcycle clubs tended to party hard, but they also seemed to follow an unspoken code. They might go in for a wild night or two, have some fun on the side, but if they were married they didn’t bring a full-on girlfriend around where their old lady might find out. Some of those wives were as tough as their husbands. Even I wouldn’t want to get on their bad side. They seemed to look the other way for the occasional stripper, but when it came to a woman really stepping into their territory and taking on the role of girlfriend? They weren’t having it.

But Sky didn’t seem the type to get into a pissing match. The more I got to know her, the more I felt certain she wasn’t cut out for a life with Griller. He was a one-dimensional brute. If he was that comfortable being unfaithful to her when she was a 24-year-old scrumptious young thing without any kids, what would the rest of their marriage look like? How would he stand by her side when things got rough, as they inevitably did for patches over a lifetime? I already knew the answer: he wouldn’t.

The fact was, though, I didn’t even really know the first thing about what Sky thought of her husband, or her marriage. Over the past few months as we’d been getting to know each other, we’d never talked about it. The silence on the subject was becoming deafening.

We sure hadn’t talked much that night I’d driven her home. Holy hell, that ride in the truck. The sight of her creamy thighs, her skirt riding up as she shifted in her seat, crossing her legs. I’d barely been able to restrain myself, my cock pressing into the zipper of my jeans. It was all I could do to stop my hand from reaching over, grazing a finger up her legs, stroking her right where I fantasized about, her opening up to me, needing me as much as I did her.

I’d been hard for practically a week afterwards. No amount of jerking off had helped, and believe me, I’d given it my all. Any other time I would have burned off some steam with another woman, but that didn’t even seem to appeal to me anymore. When I’d first opened up the bar, it had felt like a carnival every night, women practically throwing themselves at me.

But four and a half years into it, I’d grown tired of the same old. The alluring looks, the sexy come-ons, the pick-up lines and flirty moves meant to catch my attention. The first time I’d seen a woman bend over to shoot a pool ball, then glance over to make sure I was watching her rear, I’d been watching. The six-thousandth time? Not so much. And don’t even get me started about our small dance floor. I did not want to catch even one more woman trying to pull off some sexy moves over in the corner, attempting to twerk like she was in a music video.

I wanted Sky. She was the one I thought about late at night as I went to bed alone. When I woke up the next day, it was Sky on my mind again as I wondered when I’d next get the chance to see her.

Griller gave his girlfriend a wet, sloppy, open-mouthed kiss. That was the guy who got to touch her instead of me? I forced myself not to glare at them, keeping my gaze focused on the rest of the room as I stood surveying it next to the bar. Zeke and the Reapers wanted Griller dead. I was starting to want the same thing.

“We’re at 150.” Tommy came to stand next to me. We kept tabs on the number of customers night to night. Over 150 meant a good night. We were having a lot of those lately.

I nodded. I’d figured we were roughly there. The place had that just-right feel, not packed to the gills, enough breathing room so you could move around, but enough patrons to give it the crackle and energy of a hopping nightspot. I was getting the hang of this bar-owner thing. It would serve me well when I finally told Tommy I was calling it quits. At least with him.

My phone lit up with a text.

Sky: How’s the bar tonight?

I liked hearing from that woman far too much. I loved the feel of her looking out for me, remembering what mattered to me and asking about it. It was a new experience. I was an independent guy, used to being on my own, and I definitely didn’t need anyone to baby me. But it sure felt good when Sky was so thoughtful.

I’d had a lot of women in my life, never getting too serious, but I hadn’t exactly been living like a monk. Yet this strangely had to be the most intimate I’d felt with a woman in a long time. Maybe ever? And we’d never even kissed.

I’d almost kissed her that night in my truck. I probably shouldn’t have gone to pick her up in the first place. I knew I was asking for trouble. If I were married, I wouldn’t want a guy like me picking up my wife and driving her home. But if I were married, I wouldn’t let my wife stand alone at night at a bus stop if I could help it. It wasn’t the worst neighborhood where she worked, but it wasn’t the best and anything could happen to a young woman alone in the dark. Plus, I had to admit, I’d swung by to drive her home because I’d really wanted to see her.

I couldn’t help texting her back a little flirtatiously. After all, I was 25 feet away from her husband making out with another woman.

Jax: The bar’s busy. We’re hiring. You want to come work with me?

I could picture Sky serving drinks. With that smile and those curves, people would love her. That made me scowl. I could never watch her get manhandled. My bouncers would have to throw me out of my own bar for starting fights.

Sky: Sounds fun but I can’t.

I wanted to ask why. Because Mike wouldn’t want her to? Because it would be complicated to work with me? So much was going unsaid between us it was starting to drive me crazy.

I wanted to ask what she was wearing. That T-shirt she was in the night she sent me a picture? Killed me. The thing women didn’t understand was how hot they looked all undone. Hair messy and down her back, the thin cotton of the shirt molded to her curves, everything about Sky had screamed sex. And she hadn’t said she was wearing anything else. I liked to think that shirt was all she had on, ending right where I wanted to start.

I was losing my mind over her. And she felt the charge between us, too. Even when we talked somewhere public, surrounded by others, she’d blush, her cheeks flushing pink. I tried to keep my hands off of her, but every now and then I’d fail. I’d do something harmless, like slide my hand along her lower back, as if she needed assistance walking down the hallway. At my touch, her eyelids would flutter closed for a moment. I’d seen her nipples stiffen, pushing against the cotton of her shirt. Sensing her response, it was all I could do not to pull her somewhere private where I could strip off her shirt, suck and bite and make her moan.

But I couldn’t send that in a text. Instead, I settled for something tame, bland and utterly unsatisfying.

Jax: What are you up to tonight?

Sky: Babysitting a neighbor’s kid. We’re watching The Sound of Music.

I looked over and saw her husband very possibly grabbing the pussy of another woman. His hand was up her skirt, nowhere to be seen, and she was looking at him with glazed eyes. Meanwhile, his wife was helping out a neighbor and staying home watching the most wholesome of wholesome movies ever made. I shook my head, fists balled at my side. No way could it last between them.

Sky couldn’t be happy. But did she want to leave him? It was the elephant in the room. The more we didn’t mention it, the more it stood up, huge and loud, demanding to be recognized.

I wanted to keep texting. But if I let myself do what I wanted, I knew where it would lead. I’d managed to put the brakes on myself so far. But smoke was coming off them it took so much effort. Sooner or later they were going to wear out.

Jax: Enjoy your night

Sky: You have a good one too

That was how we left it, simple and platonic. But I continued to think about her all night, every woman I saw falling short in comparison. I knew exactly how I wanted Sky to enjoy her night. I wanted to feel her shaking and quivering underneath me as I drove her wild. But I’d take more than one night. I wouldn’t let her come up for air for days, drowning her in pure pleasure.

§

The next week I didn’t even see her when I went to visit Ace. He and I hung out, watched a show, chatted about nothing, then took a stroll around the courtyard. I kept looking around the whole time, an eye on the door while sitting on the couch, scanning the entrances while we walked. I felt like a heel doing it, but I couldn’t stop myself. Spending time with Ace was plenty entertaining, and that wasn’t even the right word for it. The man didn’t need to entertain. He’d done so much for me, showing me what it meant to be family. Yet, there I was, restless, unable to simply enjoy spending time with him.

“You looking for Sky?” he finally asked, seeming to already know the answer.

“No, no,” I protested too much, then added, “Why? Do you know where she is?”

Ace chuckled. “I’ve known you all your life. You shouldn’t bother trying to trash me. I know you’re looking for Sky. And no, I do not know where she is today.”

I shook my head, frustrated with myself. This thing kept building inside me, between me and Sky, and it was turning me into an idiot.

“Don’t worry,” Ace continued. “She likes you.”

I wanted to ask, “How do you know? Did she tell you?” But I was 27, about to turn 28. I was no longer in middle school, no matter how much it sometimes felt that way. “I’ve got time for a game of Gin Rummy before I leave. You up for it? Or are you scared to lose?”

Ace took the bait, of course. The man never turned down a dare when it came to cards. And he was a kind man as well as insightful. He knew when to push, and when to let the sleeping dog lie. Probably because he knew someday soon, that dog was about to wake up big time.

That night at my house, I sat outside on my back deck drinking a beer. It was a clear night, all the stars standing out bright in the sky. I could stop by the bar. I could call up a friend or a woman for company.

But I didn’t. I sat out there and imagined her coming to me. Out of the darkness, Sky’s figure would emerge. She’d be shy and unsure, but I’d open my arms, pressing her against me. No words necessary, I’d bring her inside. And then I’d touch and taste, strip her naked and savor every inch, make her cum and cum again, shaking and screaming out my name.

§

I lasted three days before I texted her. Then I gave in.

Jax: How’re you doing?

It was a Tuesday night. I’d just left her husband at my bar. He looked like he was settling in for the night with his club buddies and his girlfriend. That meant Sky wouldn’t be with him. If she wasn’t working, she might be back at her apartment, by herself.

I sat in the parking lot, straddling my bike, waiting for her reply. It came quick.

Sky: Good, thanks

Jax: What are you up to tonight?

Sky: Not much, just hanging out

Jax: At your apartment?

Sky: Yup

My bike wound its way down the city streets as if it had a mind of its own. Outside her apartment, I stopped, engine idling. I remembered the night when I’d dropped her off, the two of us sitting close in the cab of my truck. She’d pointed out which window was her bedroom, the second story one with the fire escape next to it. Her light was on. And Griller wasn’t there.

I parked my bike down the street. That’s what people did when they were up to no good. They covered their tracks, making sure there weren’t any clues to their whereabouts. I hated myself for doing it, but I’d reached a boiling point. I had to see her.

I rang the doorbell for the second-floor unit. It took a while to get any response. The building was old, at least for Southern California, and it didn’t have an intercom system. But after a minute, someone came to the door.

“Who is it?” I hadn’t heard her voice in weeks. It sounded like music.

“Hey, Sky. It’s Jax.”

“Jax?” She sounded surprised, the volume and pitch of her voice raised.

“Yeah, hope it’s OK—” I lost my train of thought when she opened the door. Her hair cascaded down in waves, tousled and free. She looked glowing, like she’d just been exercising, rosy and pink and slightly out of breath. Her short shorts made her legs look a mile long and the spaghetti-strap top she was wearing didn’t leave much to the imagination, with a scooped neckline and no bra. My mouth watered to have her so close, standing there before me looking up with wide eyes.

I cleared my throat, remembering I had been saying something. “Hope it’s OK I stopped by. I was in the neighborhood.” Incredible. I lived twenty minutes away and the route between the bar and my place went in the opposite direction. She didn’t know that, though.

“Sure, um, that’s fine.” She seemed flustered to see me, stumbling slightly as she opened the door wider to let me in. I brought my hand to her arm, steadying her. The brief contact, my palm wrapped around her smooth, warm skin, felt charged like a live wire. Moving ahead, she led me upstairs and, yes, I checked out her rear. Show me a straight man alive who could have resisted, and I’d prove to you he had no pulse.

The apartment door opened into the kitchen. It was small and clean. It didn’t seem right that the kitchen at my place was twice the size when I barely ever used it. I bet Sky would have a good time in it. I bet I would, too, if she were there. I’d probably keep her from doing much baking, though.

“So, this is the kitchen!” She gestured around, laughing at the obviousness of her statement.

I nodded, looking at her, not the kitchen. She was what I saw that looked good enough to eat. “How you been?”

“Um, fine.” She looked down at the floor. I noticed her painted toenails, that same shade of hot pink. She must like that color. I know I did. I could start there and work my way up. “How about you?”

“Good.” I ran my hand over my head, searching for words when all I wanted to do was take her into my arms. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“I know! It’s weird. Whenever I’ve worked I’ve looked for you, but I haven’t seen—” She swallowed, stopping herself, seeming to realize what she just admitted. “I mean, not that I’m looking for you.”

“I’ve looked for you.” I took a step closer, needing less distance between us. It had been too long apart from her, over two weeks since I’d seen her smile, heard her laugh. “Ace caught me doing it, too.”

“He did?” She laughed nervously, tucking her hair behind one of her ears.

“I’ve missed seeing you.”

A loud clunk from another room startled us both.

“Oh my goodness. Let me just—” She bolted away, nearly sprinting into a room off the kitchen. The door was open and I could see it was her bedroom, the light on like I’d noticed from down on the street.

I looked in and could see what had made the clunking noise. It was white, plastic, about nine inches long and vibrating nice and loud now that it had fallen onto the wooden floor. Sky swooped down fast, swiveling her back to me as she turned it off. She acted quickly, but not before I’d seen her vibrator.

She must have been using it and left it on when she’d gone to answer the door. It had vibrated its way right off the bed. She had to be mortified.

But that wasn’t foremost on my mind. What occupied every millimeter of space in my brain was the vivid image of her masturbating, spread out across her bed right where the sheets were thrown back, her lips parted in a moan. Now I knew why she’d looked flushed and glowing when she’d answered the door. Now I understood why she’d been out of breath. She’d been pleasuring herself, maybe close to orgasm right when I’d rung the doorbell.

My cock sprang hard and ready, pressing against my jeans. I walked over to the doorway, arriving in time to see her stash it fast under her pillow. When she turned around to look at me, she’d turned as red as a strawberry.

“Sorry, my alarm clock went off!”

I could read arousal all over her body, from the way she shivered slightly to the pebbling of her nipples. Heavy-lidded, I took a step closer.

“That was such a funny mistake!” She fumbled for words, laughing nervously, backing herself in a corner. I followed, closing in on her. “I must have set the alarm for p.m., not a.m. and it started vibrating.”

“Sky,” I murmured, done with excuses. I was finished with all the reasons to resist. If she’d been feeling anything like the sexual frustration I had been for months now, we were both about to lose our minds. I reached out and took a strand of her hair in my fingers.

Breathing quick, she held still, watching my hand. Between my thumb and forefinger, I stroked her hair, then leaned closer so I could breathe her in, the scent I knew so well, had missed so much the past couple of weeks.

“Jax,” she whispered, her breath coming out in a pant. She sounded needy, nearly pleading. But for what?

My hand at the back of her head, I tilted her back and kissed her, sound and full as I’d wanted to a thousand times. Only this time I was really doing it, pressing my lips to hers as she moaned into my mouth, her hands coming around my shoulders, her fingers digging into me. A growl forming in my throat, I devoured her, drugging myself on her lips, her tongue.

At times I’d told myself one kiss would be enough. I’d thought maybe I could find a stolen moment with Sky and kiss her, just once. No one would ever have to know. But now I knew that was impossible. The more I kissed her the more I wanted to kiss. We only broke apart when she pressed her hand to my chest, her forehead to my chin.

“Wait,” she asked, panting. “I need to…” Her breasts heaved up and down as she breathed. My hands cradled her waist, small against my large frame. I caressed her curves, slowly, letting her take a breath. I wanted to give her space so she could choose to keep on going. “I can’t think!” She swallowed, bringing a shaking hand up to her forehead. “I’ve been telling myself we couldn’t do this! We could never do this!”

“Have you been thinking about it?” I whispered in her ear, feeling her shiver at my words. She nodded, pressing against me. Her mind might be struggling to put distance between us, but her body wanted to get even closer.

“I think about kissing you, Sky.” I placed a light kiss on her cheek, then down her throat, holding back. I wanted to feast on her, but only if she wanted that, too. So I restrained myself, giving her the slightest flick of my tongue, the barest hint of a lick against her sensitive skin.

My hands roamed her body, stroking, feeling the fullness of her hips, the dip of her waist. With just my thumbs, I caressed the base of her breasts. Her nipples pressed against her tank top, aching for me. I could take them into my mouth, lick and suck. But I didn’t. I just swept my thumbs slowly along the swell of her breasts, tantalizing, making her want more.

“What were you doing before I got here tonight, Sky?” I knew already, but I wanted to hear her say it. I wanted to hear her confess, breathy and aroused, tell me how she’d been touching herself. I brought a hand down to her thigh, stroking her bare skin below her shorts.

“Jax.” Her voice shook, her fingers trembling as she brought them to my arms, moving along my muscles. She touched me as if she couldn’t believe she was doing it, her palms sliding along my biceps, down my forearms, up to my shoulders.

I nuzzled her ear, kissing her as I murmured, “You can tell me.”

“I…it’s not…” She buried her head in the crook of my neck.

I stroked her hair. “It’s nothing to be ashamed about.” I soothed her, my hand along her throat, down her back, at her hips. All soft curves, melting against me, she felt so right.

“I can’t believe you saw that,” she choked out, burning with embarrassment.

“Do you know how many times I’ve thought about you, Sky? Late at night, alone in my bed.”

She looked up at me, her eyes wide with realization. Had she not known how much I wanted her? I kissed her again, showing her how I felt, how I couldn’t stay away from her, not any longer. Holding her in my arms, feeling her need me just as much as I needed her, I couldn’t believe I’d lasted that long. I pressed her back into the wall, craving more friction, more contact, wanting her breasts right up against my chest.

Working my hand down at her waistband, I traced the edge. “Tell me, Sky,” I murmured. “Were you touching yourself?”

She gasped, both at my words and at my fingers dipping slowly inside her shorts, tracing a slow, lazy path down her stomach. As I kissed her throat, her head tipped back and I heard the word I’d wanted to hear.

“Yes,” she confessed.

With a hiss of satisfaction, I nipped at her earlobe, wanting to claim her, needing to mark her as mine. My fingers swept lower over her skin, so hot and soft. I wondered whether she’d be wet if I reached lower still, melting for me like I’d always dreamed she would be.

“Tell me, what were you thinking about?” I whispered.

Her answer was a moan, long and hungry. “You, Jax. I was thinking about you.”

We were so caught up in each other, we missed the sound of the apartment door opening. But then a loud stumbling sound from the kitchen roused us from our private world.

“Idiot!” We both heard Griller cursing, loud and clear. He must have knocked into something when he’d walked into the apartment, probably losing his footing he was so drunk.

Sky looked up at me in stark panic, all traces of the bliss she’d felt just moments ago vanished from her face. “Go!” she begged in a frantic whisper, rushing to the window leading out to the fire escape. With her shoulder to the frame, she hoisted it up. “Go now!”

I looked at her, dark and longing. I didn’t want to scurry out like a rat, hiding in the night. She belonged with me, not him.

“Please,” she pleaded, panic working its way into her voice.

“Idiot.” I echoed her husband in the other room as I climbed out the window and worked my way down the fire escape, cursing every step.

7

Sky

Three days after Mike had nearly walked in on me and Jax. I was still shaking. I felt like a giant tornado had torn through town heading straight for me. Only at the last second had it veered off path for a narrow miss. I couldn’t believe any of it had happened.

First, I couldn’t wrap my mind around the fact that Jax had randomly stopped by my apartment to visit. I’d become accustomed to my own obsession with him. My nearly constant thoughts of Jax had kept me company for months now. But I’d told myself it was one-sided. I’d figured my crush was just the by-product of a woman in the midst of an unhappy marriage. It was pretty easy to get attached to Jax. I was sure women got attached to him all the time. I was probably only one in a long line of women thinking about him, texting with him, reading way too much meaning into his brief messages and glances.

I’d pretty nearly convinced myself that nothing was really going on with Jax. It was all in my head. And it had helped me to stay away from him. For most of the last few weeks, I’d managed to stop sending him texts. I thought about him all the time, wondering what he was up to, wanting to share my day, my thoughts, but I’d stopped acting on impulse. I told myself it was pathetic, my attachment. I was acting like a nerdy schoolgirl crushing on the popular football star who barely knew she existed. In reality, I was a married woman, and I needed to focus all my energies on changing that fact.

But then he’d shown up, at my door, just like I’d fantasized about him doing so many nights. He’d looked exactly like I always imagined, wearing worn jeans and a black T-shirt that hugged him just right. He looked so rugged, with a little bit of stubble. And the way he looked at me, as if he’d missed seeing and talking to me as much as I’d missed him. It nearly took my breath away.

And I’d already been slightly winded. When he’d rung the doorbell, I’d been right in the middle of a hot fantasy about none other than Jax. I’d been on the bed, lost in my imagination as I messed myself with my vibrator. I’d started out slow, just my fingers. Mike was out and I didn’t expect him home, so I’d taken my time. Building it nice and steady, I’d pictured Jax, sitting with him in his truck like we had the night he’d driven me home. Only this time he hadn’t just dropped me off. Instead of my hopping out of the cab, he’d pulled me close to him, kissed me deep and full. I’d slid over, straddling his lap, running my hands over his body the way I’d wanted to so many times.

When my fantasy got more X-rated, him unzipping his jeans, shoving my skirt up and slipping me out of my panties, I’d reached for my vibrator. I’d wanted to feel it up inside of me, thrusting in where I was so wet for him, while I thought about his cock. How it would feel to have him inside of me, taking me, making me ride him in the darkness, so forbidden, so hot.

Right when I’d been about to cum, imagining him grabbing onto my hips, ramming me down again and again onto his huge, hard cock, the doorbell had rung. Disoriented, panting, I’d barely managed to slip on a pair of shorts. And apparently I hadn’t remembered to turn off the vibrator. I’d left it there buzzing away on the bed, a little too close to the edge.

I’d felt so obvious, standing with him the kitchen, my vivid fantasy mingling with reality. He had to have noticed I was flushed, my hair all messy, my breathing coming fast. I wasn’t even wearing a bra. I clearly hadn’t been thinking, answering the door like that.

And then the clunk. I’d nearly died of embarrassment when I’d realized what had fallen down onto the floor in my bedroom. Hearing that buzz on the hardwood, I’d known instantly what made the sound. I’d sprinted as fast as I could. I bet if someone had clocked me I’d have set a new world record.

But when he’d caught me, burning shame had turned into a whole different kind of heat. Backed into a corner, trapped, a switch had flipped inside of me. I went from praying he wouldn’t find out what I’d been up to, to desperately wanting him to know. I’d wanted him to make me tell him how bad I’d been. I’d needed to admit my obsession. Finally touching, kissing, confessing, it had felt like getting swept up in a tidal wave, all that pent-up longing built up over all those months crashing over us.

Then we’d heard Mike in the other room. If we hadn’t, we’d both probably be dead. I’d been so far gone, so lost to the moment, I think I’d been about 30 seconds from unzipping Jax’s jeans and begging him to take me. If he’d spread my legs, I would have pleaded with him to mess me hard, right up against the wall. Then Mike would have walked in and killed us both.

I wasn’t exaggerating. Mike kept a gun on him at all times. If he’d walked in on Jax and me having sex, there was no way he would have wanted to have a conversation about it. Nor would he have been satisfied with using his fists. Things would have gotten real bloody real fast, especially since he was drunk.

I’d narrowly avoided complete disaster. And as the survivor of a near-death experience, I knew what I should do. I should make the sign on the cross, blow a kiss up to heaven and vow to live the rest of my days in a sanctified and righteous manner. I should embrace eternal gratitude that Mike’s stumble gave us the 60 seconds of warning we needed to cover up our transgressions. And I should never talk to Jax again.

My phone rumbled with a text.

Jax: Are you all right?

I put it back into my pocket and continued my rounds. So far, in the three days since we’d nearly gotten caught, I’d managed to avoid him. I’d lost myself in the constant busyness of work, the unending stream of demands. But I functioned on autopilot, my body doing what was required while my mind stayed locked on one subject and one subject alone.

Because my guilty secret was that, deep down, I felt thrilled. Elated. Jax liked me. Late at night, while I’d been alone in bed thinking about him, he’d been doing the exact same thing. The thought of it was like taking a big shot of potent liquor, the liquid flowing through my veins like molten lava. I shouldn’t be thinking about it. I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

I kept replaying certain moments. The feel of his large, warm hand sliding along my waist. His thumb caressing my jaw as he tipped my head back into a kiss. The way he whispered into my ear, his breath making me tingle, his words making me ache. I thought I’d been obsessed with Jax before? Now I felt certifiably insane, unable to focus on a single thing other than him.

But I had to force myself to do it. After Jax climbed down the fire escape, Mike had barely grunted at me before he’d passed out on the bed. With him snoring so loudly, completely out of it, I’d snuck into the other room, climbed up on a stool and reached into the deep recesses of the uppermost shelf to get out my backpack. The one with my stash of money. With shaking hands, I’d counted it all up. I had a little over 800 dollars. I’d almost started crying.

I felt like I needed 2,000. The getaway wouldn’t cost too much money. Bus fare to Phoenix was cheap, and then I could stay in a pay-by-the-night hotel, but probably only for a week. Those places were rough. I didn’t want bedbugs, guys harassing me, fights outside my door between a pimp and his girls. Plus, it was too public. If Mike somehow figured out what city I headed to, he’d start by looking in those transient hotels, knowing that was where I’d be most likely to be found.

What came next was the part that would require a lot of cash. I needed to disappear. I figured the best way to do that would be to find a little apartment somewhere in a quiet neighborhood where I could keep to myself. With cash on hand, a landlord wouldn’t require references, my credit history, my last address, making all the kinds of inquiries and phone calls that would light up a trail connecting me to Mike. I could find someone who’d take it in hand, no questions asked, and give me a place to live.

I bet I could find work pretty easily. Everyone needed health aides, whether for home care visits or in a facility. I was sure Maria would act as a reference for me, and I knew I could trust her completely to never divulge anything to anyone. But that would still take time to find and start a new job.

At this rate, it would take me another eight months to save up what I needed. That made me want to break down and cry. I had to find another way to make money.

Pushing an elderly resident in her wheelchair, giving her a slow turn around the courtyard for some fresh air and sunshine, I racked my brain. I loved baking pies, but they weren’t exactly a huge moneymaker. Baking in my kitchen in small batches, mostly using fresh ingredients since they tasted best, I had a narrow profit margin. I hadn’t crunched all the numbers since it was still a hobby more than a business, but I figured I made about 50 cents a pie. That would be a lot of pies before I hit 2,000.

Almost as soon as the next idea came to me, I pushed it aside. I wasn’t that desperate. Yet. But I knew a girl back in my hometown who’d started making good money as a camgirl. She’d bought herself a webcam for 50 bucks, set it up in her bedroom, joined a site and started her career.

She’d bragged about it to anyone who’d listen. She said that the guys were dumb and it was easy to get them to pay you to do things. It was fun to earn 300 bucks masturbating in your bedroom for a few hours. I already spent pretty much every night doing that. Jax had me so worked up I could barely see straight. If I could really earn that kind of money, in one week I’d be all set and ready to go.

But I couldn’t do it. First, there was the very real possibility of Mike finding out. If he walked in and found me naked, playing with myself to an online audience, he wouldn’t exactly laugh it off. And then there was the fact that I just didn’t think I could do it. I was pretty handy with my vibrator, but that was in the dark, alone, for my own private enjoyment. There was a good chance that in front of my computer, lights, camera, action would leave me anxious, uptight and dry as a desert.

So, no to camgirl. No to pie making. I’d just have to work as many extra shifts at the home as I could. And maybe I could cut back even more on spending? Never buy a cup of coffee. Always bring my lunch to work, and make it something cheap like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Making good on my intentions, I covered the first couple hours of Maria’s shift that night. But that meant when I got home, it was late. And Mike was there.

“You cheating on me?” he asked, breath hot and heavy with the fumes of alcohol.

“No, I covered part of someone’s shift.”

He stalked over, backing me into the corner, leering through bloodshot eyes. “You can’t get nothing past me.” He fastened his hand to my throat, holding me against the wall, pinning me there while he stared into my eyes. I clawed at his hand, unable to breathe, eyes wide with panic. Then he released me, told me he wasn’t staying for supper, and headed out the door.

In the bathroom, I splashed water on my face, then sank to the edge of the tub. Head in my hands, I knew the truth. There was something deeply wrong with Mike. There probably always had been, I just hadn’t wanted to see it. I’d been too excited to leave my small town of people doing nothing and going nowhere. Too flattered that the big, tough motorcycle guy from L.A. had picked me to ride with him to Vegas.

I’d seen clearly during those few seconds he’d gripped my neck. He was strong enough to cut off my airflow. But what was worse, I could see the capacity to do it in his eyes. There was a coldness there, something dead, non-responsive and black.

I needed out, and I needed out fast. If I worked as much as I could and lived like a nun, maybe by February I could leave. Six months. I could make it that long. Even if it sounded like a lifetime away.

But during that time I absolutely had to stay away from Jax. It felt so good in his arms, everything I’d dreamed it would be and more. I lost all my inhibitions, instantaneously. All common sense, all awareness of reality had vanished the second he’d touched me. That was the problem. He was like a drug, and people got crazy when they were on drugs. Now wasn’t the time to get crazy. Now was the time to play it safe, keep my head down and focus on my goal. So I kept ignoring his texts, even as he kept trying to reach me.

The next Monday, he came to visit Ace. I knew we were bound to see each other soon. He arrived in the late afternoon. I’d been holding my breath, waiting and wondering.

“There she is!” Ace exclaimed as I entered, carrying a package that had arrived for him in the mail. “You’re a sight for sore eyes!” Ace always made me feel like I started a party by walking into the room.

“Let me get that for you.” Jax took the package from me, his hands grazing mine for the briefest moment as he lifted it. My heart raced, the air between us so charged I could practically feel it crackle. He looked so dark and big my mouth watered just from being in the same room. Now that I’d been wrapped in his arms, standing so close without touching felt painful. Resisting the unknown temptation was hard. Resisting the known delight was even harder.

So I bustled around, tidying, asking Ace about his day, what he’d eaten, whether he’d taken his medication. “Your movie request got approved,” I enjoyed telling him. He liked shaking things up.

“No kidding.” He looked pleased. Friday night, the retirement community would be watching Dirty Grandpa featuring Robert De Niro and Zac Efron. “You should watch with us,” he encouraged me. “It has that young boy in it. The one with the nice chest.”

“I might do that,” I agreed. After plumping the pillows on the couch and folding up a blanket strewn across a chair, I excused myself, explaining I had a lot to do. All the while, though I was so hyper-aware of Jax’s presence, I managed to not even make eye contact.

But he followed me to the door. “You working anyone else’s shift tonight?” His low, gravelly voice made anything sound sexy. I bet even when he called to order a pizza the woman taking his order fell for him.

“No, not tonight.”

“You’re off at six?”

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak, look or any other basic functions. It took all my focus and effort to walk out the door. Why did Jax remember the timing of my shifts when my own husband couldn’t? Because he paid attention to me. Because he liked me. I knew the answers now, and it didn’t exactly firm up my resolve to keep my distance.

When I walked out at ten past six, Jax was waiting for me standing by his truck. I slowed down when I saw, but kept walking toward him. His magnetism was so strong he may as well have caught me in a tractor beam.

“Hey.” He shifted his stance, from leaning against his truck to standing, thumbs hooked in the belt loops of his jeans as he looked at me. “Can I give you a ride?”

Swallowing, I nodded. As he walked around and opened the passenger door, I followed, telling myself I wasn’t violating any rules about keeping my distance. This way, during the ride home, I could clearly and calmly explain why we needed to stay away from each other. It would be a clean break.

In the cab together, I instantly realized I’d made a grave mistake. I’d changed after my shift, as was my habit. August was Cavallo Canyon’s hottest month, so I’d slipped into a sundress with spaghetti straps and a high hemline. It showed way too much skin. Now that I sat so close to Jax, every inch of it tingled.

“How you been?” he asked as he pulled out into the street.

“Fine. Working a lot. You?”

“I’ve been worried about you.” He glanced over before returning his gaze to the traffic. “What happened that night?” He shook his head, seeming angry with himself. “I’m sorry I put you in that situation. But I can’t say I’m sorry it happened.”

“Jax, this is really…” I closed my eyes, struggling for words. “This is really complicated.”

“Do you love him?”

“What?” Startled, I looked up, studying his profile, his strong jaw locked and tense. At the next store we passed, he turned into the lot.

Behind the building, he parked in a space. Then he turned to me. “Do you love him?”

“Mike?” I knew he meant Mike, I just couldn’t quite believe we were discussing him. Over the past six months our growing friendship had neatly and completely avoided the subject. Jax nodded in affirmation.

I looked down and fiddled with my dress. I looked up and felt tears burning in my eyes. It was such a simple question, but I felt like a bad person answering it honestly. But, finally, I did. “No.”

“Leave him,” he responded instantly. “Leave him, Sky. He doesn’t deserve you.”

Burying my face in my hands, I shook my head. “It’s not that simple.”

“But it is.” He brought his hand to my shoulder, palm to my bare skin and I lit up at his touch. “Sky.” As he stroked my hair, I leaned into him. Even the way he said my name was a caress. “You should be with someone who takes care of you. Makes you feel good.”

He made me feel so good. After all the worry and stress and guilt, it felt so good to stop, just stop and feel the heat of his fingers, his lips as he leaned down and kissed me. I reached for him, drawing him closer, shifting so I could get closer still. Kissing, twisting against him, panting, I couldn’t get enough. I could tell he felt the same way, clutching me, a rumble deep in his throat as he kissed and licked my neck.

His hand roamed down to my thighs, stroking, working its way up. I moaned, fisting his shirt. I wanted him to touch me so badly, right where I’d ached and throbbed for him for so long now. I brought my fingers down to his. Looking up into his eyes, I pressed his hand, showing him exactly where I wanted him to touch me and just how much I wanted it.

He growled with masculine satisfaction as he slid a finger along the silk of my panties. “So wet,” he murmured, reverent as he stroked me. I moaned at his touch, shamelessly opening my legs, desperately needing more. “I’ve wanted you so long,” he whispered, pushing my panties aside, stroking me where I was so slick for him and hot. “You feel so good,” he groaned, kissing my ear, my throat, my lips as he started working me in a rhythm.

“Jax.” I grabbed at his arms, his shoulders, digging my nails into his forearm. He crooked his finger inside me, pressing against my clit. I gasped, so close, so quick.

“I want you to cum for me, Sky. Cum on my fingers.” His voice alone, rough and deep, got me so fevered I cried out, about to do exactly as he said. But then I opened my eyes. A few spots away from us, a mom and her kid were getting out of their car. We were in a public parking lot, sunlight streaming down on us through the window of his truck.

“Wait, no.” I pushed him away, moving over to the far edge of the seat, pulling my dress down. I missed him the second I lost contact, but what were we doing? We couldn’t get carried away. It would only lead to more heartache, more pain. “I can’t do this.”

“What?”

I didn’t answer, knowing how quickly I’d melt if I started to talk. Instead, I unlocked the door and climbed out. He came around, at my side in an instant.

“Sky—”

“I need to go.” I started walking toward the corner I knew had a bus stop. I’d wait until the next bus came and then I’d take it home, alone, safely away from Jax.

“Don’t push me away. I want to help.” He stayed by my side, walking with me, until I responded.

“If you want to help, then leave me alone.” I kept on walking, but he stopped. Behind me, I heard him curse in frustration. But he respected my request, leaving me alone. I should have felt relieved, but all I felt was empty.

8

Jax

I hated everything about standing and watching Sky walk to the bus stop. I hated not having her in my arms. I hated seeing the tension in her shoulders, the forced determination in her walk. And, most of all, I hated knowing that she was right.

I hadn’t intended to touch her when I’d waited to give her a ride. Of course I’d wanted to. I’d thought about not much else since the last moment I’d had her in my arms. But I knew there was a lot we needed to talk about, sort out. I didn’t want to be an adulterous dawg. I swore I didn’t.

But then the second we’d gotten into the cab of my truck, it was like a rising tide all around me, the desire to touch her, hold her, kiss her. It drowned out my other thoughts, overwhelmed my rational intentions. And then when she’d taken my hand and brought it right where she wanted it? That hadn’t exactly slowed me down.

She had the sweetest pussy I’d ever touched, so slick and hot. The way she moaned and twisted against me, I’d be replaying those moments over and over in my head on an endless loop. But I had to respect her wishes. She’d asked me to leave her alone.

Except Griller was a coldblooded mongrel. She had to know that. And she’d admitted she didn’t love him.

I had Zeke just waiting to get tipped off. Next time Griller showed up at my bar, I could place a call. Then I could detain him, plying him with free drinks, keeping him happy, guard down, until Reapers showed up at the door. It would be so easy.

Personally, I wouldn’t even have a guilty conscience. Griller had been playing with fire for a long time. I’d heard stories that made even me feel a cold chill, the kind of stuff that let you know he didn’t just torture and kill with efficiency, he enjoyed it. He loved his work.

But when I’d asked Sky to leave him, she’d told me it wasn’t that easy. Maybe she still felt attached to him? Maybe she didn’t want a divorce? In a world filled with people leaving each other, passing in and out of each other’s lives regardless of promises and commitments as significant as children, was it possible Sky felt like she had an unbreakable bond?

But she could be talking about the logistics of leaving. Maybe she’d made up her mind that she wanted a divorce, but she had to figure out how to do it. Griller wasn’t the type of guy to walk away easy. Even though he’d now clearly shacked up with another woman, he likely viewed Sky as his possession. The man was a Neanderthal.

Not that I was exactly the most advanced man on the planet. I was neither a vegan astrophysics college professor nor a macrobiotic Nobel-prize winning author. I was a man, plain and simple, who liked cold beer, red meat and hot women. Only that plural term had narrowed down to one, just one woman for months now. And I had a serious caveman urge to carry her over my shoulder back to my cave and make her mine.

I had to find a way to talk to her. I would just have to tie my hands behind my back while I did it. That was the problem with getting too close. Now that I knew how good it felt to reach out, her silky skin, her soft lips, the need radiating out from her every movement, every sound, I didn’t know how I could resist.

§

A week went by without seeing or hearing from her. I hated it, but she’d clearly told me what she wanted. So I held back. I knew we’d run into each other at Cavallo Canyon sooner or later. Until one week became two, then three. By my third visit with Ace, it was early September, and I was worried.

“Have you seen Sky lately?” I asked Ace, not caring any more if I sounded like I had a crush. I did, and I wanted to know where she was.

“I haven’t seen Sky at all.” He looked unhappy. “One of the other aides told me she quit. Without even saying goodbye!”

Out in the hallway, I stopped one of the nurses walking past. “Hey, do you know where Sky is? Sky Cabrillo?”

“She doesn’t work here anymore.” She walked away, not offering any more information. I stood there, stunned. When had Sky quit? Why had she done it? I felt like someone had sucker punched me, hard.

I’m ashamed to admit it, but one of my first thoughts was about my own loss. I’d never get to see her again while I visited Ace. Without the ability to make plans with her the way I wanted, I’d more than looked forward to those casual encounters. I’d depended on them. Now, nothing bound us together. I had no legitimate reason to get in touch with her. In fact, the last thing she’d said to me was “leave me alone.” Who knew when I’d ever see her again? Was it possible for someone who meant so much to me to simply disappear, to vanish from my life without a trace?

But then a much worse thought had occurred to me. Sky might be in trouble. Suddenly leaving her job wasn’t like her. I’d seen her at work enough to know she was a responsible person. She took her job seriously. It wasn’t like her to up and quit without saying a proper goodbye to all the residents who’d become so attached to her.

She’d only have quit if she were pressured to do it. I felt it in my bones. Had Griller forced her to leave her job? Had he hurt her?

After a quick goodbye, I hopped on my bike and rode straight over to Sky’s place. I knew she might not be alone, and going there was in direct violation of what she’d most recently asked of me. But I needed to see her, at least to assure myself that she was all right. I didn’t want to hear that from her via text, or even a phone call. I had to see for myself.

I rang and knocked, impatient for the door to open. Good or bad, I had to know what was going on. After a short while, I heard fumbling with the deadbolt and Sky appeared.

“You shouldn’t be here.” She instantly started to back away, closing the door behind her.

“Sky.” I stepped forward, wanting to reach out and touch but stopping myself before I did it. “Talk to me for a minute.”

She looked down, hair hiding part of her face. She shook her head and repeated. “You shouldn’t be here.” But she kept the door ajar.

“Two minutes, Sky. I just want to make sure you’re OK. I heard you’re not working at the home anymore.”

She sighed, her shoulders sagging under an invisible, heavy weight. “I shouldn’t do this,” she muttered, but then she opened the door. “Two minutes,” she echoed my request. “But then you have to get out of here.”

She shut the door behind me, but before she did she looked both ways, like we were criminals up to no good. I cringed at the implication, partially because I knew it had some truth to it. Real adult life was so much more complicated than I’d thought as a kid. I remembered how my father used to cheat on my mother, and how I’d promised myself I’d never do that kind of thing to a woman. Now here I was, sniffing around a married woman’s heels. Only I promised myself, this time I’d keep my hands to myself.

Up in her kitchen, things didn’t look right. It was messy, the shades drawn, no sign of the usual energy and liveliness Sky seemed to embody. She closed the apartment door behind her, then stood with her arms crossed, still looking down, not meeting my eyes.

“How are you, Sky?” I felt even more concerned than I had when I’d first arrived. “Are you all right? Why did you quit your job?”

She exhaled, shaking her head. It was when she brought her hand to her forehead that I caught a glimpse. With her hair further back away from her face, I could see a dark bruise along her cheekbone.

“Sky.” At her side, I took her hand, went to touch her face. She jerked away, putting space between us.

“It’s nothing. I’m fine.” She let her hair fall back down again, hiding the worst of the bruising.

“Did he do that to you?” My voice tight and controlled, fury churned up inside of me. I knew before she answered. Griller had done it, the monster.

“It’s not your business.” She shook her head. “I shouldn’t have brought you up here. You should go.”

Before she could open the door again, I asked, “Did he hurt you?”

She rubbed her forehead and muttered, “He was angry. We got in a fight.”

“Idiot!” I kicked the side of the refrigerator. The loud clang echoed throughout the small apartment.

“Jax, I don’t need another big, pissed-off guy storming around here.”

I ran a hand over my head, trying to calm myself down. She was right. It wouldn’t do anyone any good for me to lose my temper. Not yet anyway. I could save that for when I could plant my fist into Griller’s skull.

“What did you fight about?” I remembered the last time I was there, how I’d snuck out the window and down the fire escape like an escaped convict. Was there any chance he’d found out? Had I gotten her in trouble? “He doesn’t think—?”

“He does think I’m cheating on him,” she confirmed, sounding as bitter as I’d ever heard her. “He made me quit my job because of it. But he has no idea about you.”

“Why then?”

“Because he found my birth control pills.” She threw up her hands in exasperation. “I may as well tell you everything.” She shook her head and continued. “Mike wanted to fix things between us by having a kid, but I wanted to leave him so I went on the pill. Then he found them because I suck at hiding things. And he got furious.”

I wanted to take her into my arms so badly my teeth hurt from clenching my jaw. But I didn’t, even though I noticed how she shook, how she’d lost weight. She had shadows under her eyes, but still she looked so heartbreakingly beautiful.

“He should never…” I had to pause, balling my fists as rage pumped through my veins. “He has no right to hurt you.”

“I was stupid. I left them right out on the counter where he could find them.”

“You’re an honest person. That’s not a bad thing.”

“I’ve sucked at hiding things from you, too, haven’t I?” She eyed me ruefully. “You’ve probably known for months I’ve had a crush on you.”

“I was too caught up in my own to know for sure.” I hated that we were finally having this conversation while she stood across the room from me, a dark bruise blooming on her face. The mongrel deserved to die. The urge to protect her rose up so fierce, I barely had any room to register she was expressing feelings for me.

With a nervous glance at the clock on the stove, she started toward the door again. “Anyway, you should get going, Jax. What if he walked in right now?”

“What if you walked out right now?” The words came out before I’d fully thought them through, but the second I said them I knew I absolutely meant it. “Leave with me. Walk away. You’ve said you want to. Do it now, with me.” Urgent, I moved toward her, wanting to take her hand. But again, as if we were magnets with opposing forces, she pushed away, maintaining distance.

“I can’t.”

“Why not? I care about you, Sky. I know I don’t know you that well, yet. But I’d like to. I’d like to help you. See that you’re safe.” I reached out, trying to touch her hair, but she brushed my hand away.

“I can’t think with you here talking like that.” She sounded frustrated, not swayed.

“Then let’s leave and have the conversation somewhere else.” She looked so frail and sad there in the dark kitchen. I wanted to take her to my house. Or even better, I could take her someplace down in Mexico with a beach. I could whisk her away, the two of us sipping tropical drinks and making love—

“It’s not that simple.” She interrupted my train of thought. “I’m married.”

“But you want to leave him.” Why wasn’t she seeing this the way I was?

“I need time to work this out,” she insisted, like I was making things harder and more complex instead of the other way around. “I’m going to leave him. But I can’t leave him for you.”

“Let me help.” But I could already sense her answer. She wasn’t yielding, wasn’t feeling persuaded at all. If anything, she was growing more agitated, more anxious for me to leave.

“It’s too complicated.”

“Dang, Sky.” I rubbed my head, looking at the floor. It seemed like a lot for her to take on. I didn’t want to list all the obstacles, but it wasn’t just that Griller was a heck of a mean guy. He was also part of a club of blood brothers, men who wouldn’t blink an eye over killing a girl who crossed any of their paths. If Griller didn’t want her to leave him, he could sure make it hard for her to do it. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. And not just because he’ll kill us both if he finds us together.” She gave a bitter laugh. “It’s…” She struggled for words. “It’s a big deal to end a marriage. I don’t want to do it because I’m infatuated with you. I need to do it for myself. Because I’m worth it.”

I nodded, struggling to listen and not crush her against my chest and carry her off. She was infatuated with me? Idiot.

“You need to go, Jax.” This time, she reached the door, standing with her hand on the knob. “When it’s all over, maybe we can, I don’t know, be friends. But for now, you have to promise me you’ll leave me alone. Please.”

She looked and sounded close to tears. I’d headed over to her apartment to make sure she was OK. Now, I knew she wasn’t, and I might have made things worse.

“I’ll go,” I promised. It hurt really bad to see how relieved that seemed to make her. “But promise me, Sky. If you need help for any reason, if he so much as lays a hand on your head—”

“Jax,” she cut me off, looking more distressed than ever.

“Call me. Find me. You have my address. I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night. I care about you, Sky. More than you know.”

It was the tip of the iceberg, but it was all I got to say. She opened the door and saw me out. She didn’t agree that she’d come to me for help. She didn’t offer me any words of assurance. All she did was whisper, “Good-bye, Jax,” as she closed the door and left me standing there outside, alone.

9

Sky

Fuck and phoo all. I closed the door on Jax, feeling like I’d ripped out my own heart. I hated sending him away, hated not touching him and rushing into his arms. It would feel so good. I could close my eyes and he’d soothe the hurt away, or at least replace it with something much, much more pleasurable.

But there was a loud voice inside me shouting “no.” For one, I didn’t want him to get hurt. I was sure Jax knew how to handle himself around guys like my husband. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Jax’s toughness. It was that being around Mike was like juggling with a loaded gun. You had no idea when it would go off, so you just held your breath, knowing at some point it would. Jax didn’t deserve to be dragged into the mess that I’d created.

And I still felt like the best thing to do was end my marriage before I started anything with anyone else. As much as I felt giddy over the connection with Jax, I also felt confused and guilty all the time. I’d deleted all of his texts, feeling like I needed a fresh start.

It wasn’t that I was striving for a moral high ground, though. I didn’t even know what that meant anymore. Back when I’d been seven or eight my mom had gone through a brief religious phase, sending me to Sunday school to learn the Ten Commandments. It had made perfect sense to me back then. The world had been black and white, with good guys and bad guys. Marriage and loyalty = good. Adultery = bad.

In real life, I was experiencing a lot more gray area. When a marriage was bad, what did that make leaving it? How about leaving it for someone else? I’d bet money Mike was involved with someone else. He didn’t even offer excuses anymore when he stayed out all night. No work, even the kind of criminal activity he did to make money, required that many all-nighters.

I so desperately wanted to throw myself into Jax’s arms and let him solve all my problems. He could whisk me away and together we’d never have another care in the world. But I’d done enough sticking my head in the sand. Romantic, escapist thinking was how I’d gotten myself into the mess in the first place. I’d married a man with the nickname “Griller.” What, did I think he made great hamburgers?

I’d tried to escape from reality by running away from my hometown with Mike. Tempting as it was to run off again, hiding from Mike and pretending Jax could fix all my problems, I knew it was stupid. Life didn’t work out like it did in a rom-com movie.

But it was tempting to think about it working out that way, in Jax’s arms as the sun set behind us. Even in my sorry state, I couldn’t help but notice how he looked sexy. So dark and brooding and big, the man looked like such a badass but he wanted to take care of me. I could see how much he wanted to hold me, the way he had to stop himself from reaching out. I felt the same way.

But I’d had enough of fantasy. I needed to ground myself firmly in reality. It was time for me to figure my trash out.

§

After a sleepless, lonely night, I headed off to my new job. Mike had found a position for me as a home healthcare aide working for the grandmother of one of the Skulls.

When he’d found my birth control pills, he’d hit DEFCON five. I’d never seen him so furious. He’d trashed the apartment and hurt me worse than he ever had before. Shaking and crying, I’d shut down to the point where I honestly couldn’t remember all of what had happened. After he’d finally stormed out, I’d sat up on the kitchen floor, possessions strewn around me and realized I was fighting for my life around that maniac.

Then he’d tightened the noose, telling me the next day I needed to quit my job. He’d found me a better one and that I needed to start ASAP. I’d protested. I loved working at Cavallo Canyon. I’d grown attached to the people I worked with, enjoyed the daily bustle and activity.

But he’d pulled a trump card. He’d accused me of cheating on him. According to him, that had to be why I was on the pill. He figured I’d met someone at work and warned me that he wouldn’t stop until he found out who it was.

The thought of Mike storming around on a witch hunt, grilling people like he was so famous for doing until he found out exactly whom I’d met at work? That couldn’t happen. So, reluctantly, hating to do it, I’d quit. It seemed like my only option. Because the truth wasn’t exactly what Mike thought it was, but there was some truth to his suspicions. I had met Jax at work. I did live for those afternoons when I got to see him, those stolen moments giving me the joy I lived on for all the days in-between. I had to quit, so Jax wouldn’t get dragged into my mess.

So now I spent my days with 82-year-old Myra, cleaning, cooking, keeping her company and, occasionally, getting her outside for fresh air. She needed round-the-clock care, but she refused to move into a care facility. She also didn’t like ever leaving her house. She was a hoarder, her entire place filled to the rafters with papers and miscellaneous junk. I did what I could, essentially clearing pathways through it all, occasionally getting a bag together that her son would secretly take away to throw out. Most days, she glued herself to the television, paying me no attention at all.

It was depressing. I desperately missed my job at Cavallo Canyon. But there was one good thing about my new job: it gave me some time to get my escape plan in gear. When I’d first seen Myra’s kitchen, I’d nearly retched over the filth. I’d set in immediately, spending hours on even small sections, taking everything out, wiping it all down, scouring surfaces. She fought me some, but she loved my cooking. As long as I didn’t touch the rest of the house and I made her meals, she let me clean the kitchen top to bottom.

Somewhere in the midst of all the scrubbing, an idea took hold. I could bake there. Once the kitchen gleamed, spic and span, I could have my way with it, bring in all my baking supplies and turn out pies all day long.

Without that, honestly, I might have died of despair. I hated how isolated I felt, my nights alone, my days with a cranky recluse who didn’t seem to like me much. I hated that Mike had such control over my life. But I made it through each day, reminding myself that it was temporary. Each day I suffered would make my freedom all that much more secure.

Pies kept me going. I started baking all day long. By the end of the first month working there, I was selling pies at four different stores, the diner plus two bakeries and a gourmet grocery store. Mike only knew about the first one. All of the rest of the profit I made, I put directly into my getaway fund.

§

Cavallo wasn’t exactly a metropolis. But it wasn’t a podunk small town either. So it surprised the heck out of me when in the span of one week I randomly saw both Jax and Mike. They weren’t together. That would have been even stranger, so strange I might have keeled over with a heart attack. But there was a striking similarity to what I saw both of them doing, even if my reaction to each was the complete opposite.

First, while I was driving through downtown I saw Jax. Myra didn’t live on a bus route, so Mike let me use the car to-and-from my job. Dark already at six o’clock, I couldn’t believe how many shops already had holiday lights in their windows. On the radio, they were already starting to play Christmas carols even though it wasn’t even Thanksgiving yet. I hated it when all the holiday celebrations got started too early. There should be a law against it, barring everything until December first so it would feel more special. I also had to admit, that season I wasn’t exactly feeling all that festive.

After thinking about Jax incessantly for months, it almost seemed surreal to look out the car window and see him walking along the sidewalk. Every big guy with cropped hair or a shaved head reminded me of him. I’d almost tired myself out the way my heart leapt every time I thought I saw Jax. But this time, it was really him.

He looked so good, larger than life, wearing the black leather jacket I recognized and faded jeans. He had the broadest, strongest shoulders and I could remember how they felt when he’d wrapped his arms around me. How hard and warm his body was, how good his fingers had made me feel.

But he wasn’t alone. He had a gorgeous blond woman on his arm, her body pressed all close up against his. She was smiling and laughing, her hair cascading down in effortless waves the way mine never did. My stomach dropped so fast it about fell out of the car onto the pavement. My heart tumbled right after it as I saw what a beautiful couple they made, how perfect they looked together.

Gripping the wheel, I forced my attention back on the road. No accidents. I could just imagine getting into a fender-bender right in front of Jax and his Barbie girlfriend. I’d step out of the car wearing old leggings and a sweatshirt, my hair smucked up into a thoughtless ponytail. Barbie would probably be super nice, asking if I was all right, if she could do anything to help me, while I desperately wished the crash had been fatal.

So that was what Jax was up to. Day after day I toiled away, isolated and increasingly depressed, my world turning a dull shade of gray. I missed Jax so bad it was like I’d lost a limb. I ached for him, remembering his gaze, his voice, his touch. Thoughts of him kept me warm at night when I felt so cold. The memory of how I’d come alive when I was with him was like a tree branch I clung to while the icy water around me rushed and rose, threatening to suck me down into its dark depths.

Meanwhile, Jax was out taking a stroll and enjoying the holiday lights with his dream girl, not a care in the world. I guessed in all fairness, I’d told him to do exactly that. I’d pushed him away, asked him to leave me alone. Looked like he’d gone and done it.

I still seethed in jealousy. What I wouldn’t give to be in her shoes, walking along on his arm, so carefree and happy by his side. I wondered if I’d ever been as happy as she looked in that moment, like she was in an ad for sunshine or youth.

As I struggled with the fact that Jax had a girlfriend, a few days later I saw proof that my husband did as well. Mike had been staying away nearly every night. I liked it that way. When he was around, he got really mean.

“I own you,” he’d hissed at me one night last week. “You try to leave me, you see what happens. You know who would miss you? No one.”

To be honest, I felt numb. I barely reacted any more, and that seemed to really piss him off. Every little thing I did or didn’t do made him enraged.

When I saw my husband downtown, not too far from where I’d seen Jax, I knew right away it was him. That was because I didn’t try to see Mike. I didn’t look for him in crowds, or fantasize about running into him. When I saw him walking along the street I simply thought, “there’s that idiot.”

He was with a woman, too. She had black hair and high, high heels, the kind I never wore. Her breasts were way bigger than mine and she wore a shirt so low-cut I could see about four inches of cleavage. Holding my breath, as if Mike could see me, I pulled over and double-parked. There in the car, I peered at them, watching as his hand drifted down to her rear and gave it a squeeze.

As I watched them, I did not burn with jealousy the way I had when I’d seen Jax. Instead, I simmered with indignant rage. No wonder Mike had accused me of cheating. He was doing it himself. They headed up some stairs. She turned her key in the lock and led him inside. So domestic. I wondered if he could get it up with her. He hadn’t gotten it up with me in months.

Later that week, I turned 25. I promised myself, by my next birthday I’d be in a better place. I hated the person I’d become, fearful, angry and isolated, watching others live their lives through my car window. I’d never wanted my life to turn out like that. I’d never believed it could get so bad until there I was, in the middle of it.

Next year, I vowed, when I turned 26 I’d have turned things around. Because a life like the one I’d been living couldn’t go on much longer. Something had to give.

10

Jax

She wanted me to leave her alone. She’d told me a whole bunch of times, showed me with her actions, too. So I did as she’d asked, no texts, calls, and no more visits. Yet Sky haunted me like a ghost.

I thought of her when I visited Ace, of course. It made sense in that context, where I’d seen her, touched her, heard her laugh. When I passed the supply room where we’d folded sheets, of course it made me think about our stolen moments, the way she’d looked up shyly into my eyes. When I looked in the mirror over Ace’s vanity, it was Sky’s face I remembered looking back at me as she shaved my head. The feel of her fingers against my neck, gentle, tantalizing.

I thought of her when I bought her pies. Good thing I was a big man and I worked out a lot or I’d be getting fat off those things. I swore she put crack in them they were so addictive.

But I thought of her other times, too, when it didn’t make as much sense. Even when it would have been a heck of a lot better to not be thinking about her. Like when I started spending time with Nikki. She’d worked as a waitress at Ace Bar last year, then left to work at a gym as a personal trainer and spin instructor. She had a body that wouldn’t quit, a pretty smile, and an easy personality. We’d always gotten along fine, and when we’d run into each other at a local coffee shop one thing had led to another.

To be honest, mostly I started dating her to get my mind off Sky. We weren’t exclusive, but we started hooking up around the holidays, which meant that by the end of January we’d been spending time together for a couple months. It wasn’t exactly the stuff that filled romance novels, but it was something. And I could tell, Nikki was starting to feel something more. She was getting attached, wanting to go to the next level. There we were, both of us 28 with friends of ours getting engaged and married.

Last year, the first of my good friends, Chase, had tied the knot. I’d been shocked. All he’d focused on that I knew of was swimming, training hours and hours each day, getting so good he made it to the Olympics. But apparently somewhere in the middle of all that he’d gone and decided to get married. I guessed from a certain perspective, it made sense. Once he fell hard for someone, he’d gone for broke. Chase was so intense that he never did anything half-ended.

But then over the holidays, the unthinkable had happened again. Easy-going Liam, voted most likely to be found at a beachside barbeque beer in hand, had popped the question. He and his fiancé were now planning a wedding the following summer. My friends weren’t exactly dropping like flies. Zeke, and I was sure Ian, were both still confirmed bachelors, but I could feel it around me, the subtle shifts in the sand. First one, then another. Before I knew it, bam, I’d wake up 30 and half my weekend plans would involve my friends’ kids’ birthday parties.

Ace wanted to meet Nikki. “When are you going to bring this girl by?” he asked me one Monday afternoon. It was raining in Southern California, a rare occurrence, and the two of us sat in chairs watching the courtyard get drenched.

“Dunno.” I ran my palm over my freshly-shaven head. I should probably introduce the two of them. Nikki had asked me about it, too, wanting to meet him over Christmas. But I hadn’t made it happen.

“You like this girl?” Even his unenthusiastic tone gave me the answer I had inside.

“She’s all right.” There was nothing wrong with Nikki. A lot of men would kill to be with a girl like her, all California blond good looks with her beach body and bright white smile. She was low-drama and easy to spend time with, no hulking violent husband lurking in the shadows.

But deep down, I wasn’t feeling it. I guessed on the surface it might look like I was being a typical guy, dragging my feet, not wanting to get into anything serious. But I knew a fear of commitment wasn’t at the heart of this. It hurt to remember it, but I’d felt pretty dang serious about Sky. That day I’d asked her to leave with me, if she’d done it I never would have looked back. No regrets, I would have become her man. I guessed once you’d felt that intense about someone, experienced that kind of electric connection, everything else paled in comparison.

“She’s nothing like Sky, huh?”

I turned to Ace, surprised, almost wondering if I’d spoken my thoughts aloud without realizing it. “Don’t worry, Jax.” Ace patted my arm. “Your secret’s safe with me. But sometimes I wonder if it should stay such a secret.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean. You don’t have to play it cool with me. I know what she meant to you, how you fell for her.”

We sat there together, the rain falling fast and hard outside. He was right. I had fallen for Sky. I hadn’t seen her in months—four to be exact—and I still couldn’t stop thinking about her.

“Why don’t you go after her?” Ace looked at me direct and serious. “Tell her how you feel?”

“She’s married.” I looked out into the rain.

“That can change.” Ace had gone through two marriages himself. He knew a thing or two on the subject.

“The thing is, I did go after her,” I admitted. It felt good to tell someone. “Back in September, I went to go see her. I asked her to leave her husband.”

“And?”

“She said no. Told me to leave her alone.”

Ace let out a low whistle. “Not good.”

“Not good.”

“That surprises me,” he added. “She really liked you. I could tell.”

“Not enough.” I didn’t doubt that Sky had liked me. She’d as much as told me that. But real life seemed to throw in a lot of obstacles. Sometimes what you wanted simply wasn’t what you got.

“You know, son, it might be time for a change.” Ace nodded out into the rain, and I knew he was right. “I appreciate your moving back here to Cavallo. I know you did it for me. But I’m doing good. I’m happy. And I have you to thank for a lot of that.”

“Well, I don’t know about that.” Ace was too generous with his gratitude.

“I do. And I think the only thing keeping you here anymore is me. You should move,” he declared. “It’s time.”

“What about the bar?”

“Cash out. Open a new one. You only live once.”

I sat next to him in silence, thinking about his advice. It echoed the thoughts I’d been having lately, more and more, like a drumbeat growing louder by the day.

§

Over the next couple of weeks, Griller came into Ace Bar a few times with his girlfriend. It seemed like he’d given up all pretenses of having a wife. The two of them didn’t look like they were hiding a little something on the side. They looked like an all-out couple. They knew each other’s drink orders and called each other’s pool shots. Griller wasn’t wearing a wedding ring. I didn’t think he ever had.

I took pleasure in having him thrown out of the bar, and he gave me ample opportunities. He picked fights when he got drunk, claiming some guy looked at him funny or tried to hit on his girl. The man was a loose cannon. He had crazy written all over him.

One night when Griller started a fight, the president of the Skulls was there to see it. As he stood and watched Griller break open a beer bottle over some poor schmuck’s head, I recognized the look in his eyes. It was the same weary high school principal look I had when I had to manage stupid trash.

A guy like Griller, he came in handy when he could be managed, his violence channeled in specific directions. But that was the thing with guys like Griller. They did not like to be managed. One day, Griller was going to lose it at the wrong time, in the wrong place, or with the wrong guy. The Prez knew that, I could tell by the guarded, displeased way he took it all in, and the subtle, disgusted shake of his head. When that day came, it would be Griller’s last.

But there was no telling what would happen to Sky in the interim. The thought of that psychopath with Sky made me sick. But she couldn’t have been more clear. She wanted me to stay away.

So I hung out with Nikki. But even while I spent time with her, my mind stayed fixed on Sky. And even an easygoing girl like Nikki finally called me on my trash.

“You’re a million miles away, Jax,” Nikki said to me one night. She’d stopped by the bar to say hello. It was a Tuesday, our slowest night of the week, and the place was dead. There was no good reason for me to be so detached and distracted, barely able to focus on our conversation while she told me about her day.

“Sorry.” I seemed to be saying that to her a lot lately.

“This isn’t working, is it?” she asked, not sounding too bent out of shape over the fact. I just looked at her, the truth in my eyes. I knew the problem was me, but I didn’t seem to be able to change it.

“You’re a good guy, Jax.” She finished her drink and pulled on her jacket. “You’ll make some girl happy. But it isn’t me.” She kissed me on my cheek, even our break up staying at a low heat.

“Nikki—” I started, wishing I had something good to say.

“You knew this was coming.” She stood up, toned and sexy with her long legs and skinny jeans. Only I didn’t want to be the one going home with her. “Better to pull the plug now than drag it out.”

She gave me a smile when she left, slightly downcast but nothing a fun night out couldn’t fix. I was pretty sure Nikki had never felt depressed in her life. She woke up on the sunny side of the bed every morning, and rested her head on a pillow with sweet dreams every night.

It was probably something messed up and dark inside of me that I couldn’t connect with her. I’d always said it, trouble dogged me my whole life. Only now I was realizing maybe there was something in me that sought it out, or attracted trouble to me like a magnet.

With a girl like Nikki, I’d probably sail through life. We could probably go years without having a real, deep conversation. She might never ask me hard questions, probably wouldn’t ever want to really get to know me. Heck, she might not understand me even if she did.

A girl like Sky? I felt like she knew me without even asking. It was as if she looked at me and saw the best and worst of me all at once. Like I could tell her anything, confess to her my worst moments and she wouldn’t even blink. I’d even told her how I still hated myself for Ian’s injuries on that boat 13 years ago. Never would I talk to Nikki about something like that. But Sky hadn’t just listened, she’d seemed to understand my guilt and self-loathing. And with the touch of her hand, the caress of her words, she’d lifted some of that burden.

Sky seemed to accept the worst in me, but also see who I wanted to be, too. The way she looked at me, blooming under my attention when I noticed little things, flushing with pleasure over small helpful gestures, she made me feel like a hero. Like I could be the man I’d always wanted to be with her.

Too bad that would never happen.

§

I had my cock in my hand when I finally made the decision. I know, so like a man, the little head doing the thinking for the big head. But sometimes it took a visceral, physical cue to get things through my thick skull.

I was in the shower, heat and steam loosening me up after a long day. I’d pushed myself through a brutal workout, then spent some hectic, long hours at the bar. At three a.m. I finally got home, alone and still revved up from all the fights I’d broken up plus the tense words I’d exchanged with Tommy. That partnership was fraying so bad I wasn’t sure how much thread still held it together.

Naked, hot water pounding down my body, I reached down and took my cock in my fist. Eyes closed, I let myself fantasize, picturing Sky’s breasts pressing against her thin cotton T, her nipples standing out in arousal. I palmed my length, stroking as I remembered the softness of her skin, the way she’d parted her thighs. Her eagerness, pressing my hand to her pussy. How wet she was for me and the sounds she made, urgent, desperate almost, begging me for more.

I came hard as I always did when I thought about Sky. Standing, panting, heartbeat racing, I realized things were not going to change. It had been six months since I’d seen or talked to her and I was not moving on. Sky was as vivid and potent to me now as she had ever been.

But she wasn’t in my life anymore. Most likely, I’d never see her again. It was time to make a change.

The next day, I cashed out of my partnership in the bar. Tommy practically shouted hallelujah and danced his way through signing all the paperwork. He turned me loose, no problem.

Now I could make the fresh start I needed so badly. Because I didn’t seem able to do it in Cavallo. It was time to move on.

11

Sky

Around nine o’clock, I finally headed home. Myra’s grandson had asked me to stay late with her, and as always I said yes. Any extra money was good money, no matter how many hours it took. I was getting close, really close. Next month was April, and that would be the time. I’d finally spread my wings and fly away.

The door was open, but the kitchen lay dark as I walked inside. Mike’s voice cut through the gloom. “You stupid jerk.”

I’d taken to ignoring Mike’s insults. I’d grown numb to them. They were all he ever said to me anymore. But something in his voice this time made me listen.

I flipped on the light. Why was he standing there in the dark? He was holding my phone, looking at me with murderous, bloodshot eyes.

“Why do you have my phone? I thought I’d lost it.” I couldn’t find it that morning. I’d searched everywhere, but then, running late, I’d left for Myra’s without it.

“You left it next to the sink. Where you leave all your dirty little secrets.”

Idiot, he was really mad about something. I hated that he had the power over me, but I started to shake. I’d gotten so good at avoiding him, and he stayed out so many nights, he’d barely hurt me in the past couple months. But given the right opportunity, I knew he could be deadly. That certainly described the look in his eyes.

“Can I—?” Instinctively, I reached for my phone, wanting it back. It was my most personal possession, with all my photos and phone numbers.

He moved it away, catching my wrist in a vice-like grip. “You’re not going to be needing your phone any more after tonight.”

Icy fear wrapped its tentacles around my heart. “Mike, what’s wrong?” I hated the way my voice quavered. I tried to stay calm, focused, and not panic.

“You thought I’d never find out?” He wrenched my arm up and behind me, forcing me against the counter. I winced in pain. “Did you think I was stupid? Did you? Huh?”

“Mike, let go of me. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I saw your texts. I know about Jax.”

I froze, my heart stopping for a moment in my chest. How could he have seen anything? I’d deleted everything.

“I used an app. I pulled them all up, every one of them. You were texting with him all summer. It went on for months, you whore.”

“No, Mike, it’s not what you think.”

His fingers closed around my throat, squeezing, so painful. I clawed at him with my free fingers, like a bird pecking at an elephant. He didn’t move an inch, just stared at me with that cold, dead look in his eyes as he tightened his grip. Eyes wide, panic set in as I gasped for air. He’d threatened enough times. Now he was going to actually do it. He was going to kill me.

Desperate, I looked around for something I could use, something to help me get away from him. Over by the stove, a glint of metal caught my eye. A steak knife, left out in my haste to get out of the house that morning. If I could only get myself closer and reach out quick enough, I could grab it.

I stopped fighting him. I gathered all the strength I still possessed and hurled myself toward the knife. It must have been the element of surprise, my lurching to the right when he hadn’t expected it, because I got there. I reached out, made contact and wrapped my hand around the handle. Fast, quicker than I thought I’d ever acted before in my life, with all my might I jammed it straight into his gut.

He yelled in rage, releasing my throat. Stepping back in shock, he looked down at the handle sticking out of his stomach. “Forget you do, jerk? You stabbed me!”

Gasping, sputtering for air, I doubled over, my lungs burning as I sucked in oxygen, my sight blurring with effort.

“You’re gonna pay.” He lunged at me, but I saw him coming and twisted away. Bringing my elbow up as hard and sharp as I could, I caught him right under his chin, rocking his head back. On its own, that wouldn’t have been enough. If that was all I had, he would have regained his balance and kept coming at me.

But he slipped. He’d started bleeding, the knife wound in his stomach leaking blood down his pants and dripping onto the floor. He stepped in it and when my elbow caught him in the jaw he lost his balance, slipping and falling. The sound his head made when he cracked it against the edge of the countertop was so loud I almost felt like I was in a movie, the sound amplified for effect. He toppled to the ground, the weight of his body slamming against the floor with a quaking thud.

I stood for a few seconds too long, staring at him lying there. He looked unconscious, but I shouldn’t have wasted any time finding out. I was shocked, though, so shocked to see that knife sticking out of his gut. His eyes stayed closed as he lay there, breathing heavily, passed out on the floor.

Movement returned to my limbs in a rush, a surge of adrenaline jolting me into action. He’d dropped my phone after I stabbed him. I ran to it and snatched it up. Running into the bedroom, I threw open the closet, pulled down the blankets I kept on the uppermost shelf and grabbed my backpack behind them, the one with all the cash. Without even a glance behind me, I shoved the window open and jumped out onto the fire escape. Every step sounded so loud, the noise of my footsteps on the metal loud enough to wake the dead.

Was Mike dead? I didn’t think so. The fall had knocked him unconscious, but he’d be up again soon. Like a monster, he’d come after me, searching until he could destroy me.

I’d been planning for months, saving up, getting close to the day I would buy a one-way bus ticket to Phoenix. I’d rehearsed the plan in my head a million times. I’d do it on one of my days off, when I’d have hours without anyone looking for me. But now was not the time to go wait at a bus station. Mike would know to look there. He’d probably find me as I sat there, shaking.

But I knew where he’d go first. I had to get to Jax before Mike. At a red light, I took out my phone. He might be at the bar, or out with his girlfriend. I needed to warn Jax that he was in danger.

Sky: You home?

Seconds later, he replied.

Jax: I can be in a few minutes. Everything OK?

Sky: Be there in 5

I’d be there in five. He had to be there in five. It meant both, and no I was not OK but I didn’t take the time to say it. When the answer was no, it made more sense to just drive.

I knew where Jax lived. He’d given me his address months ago and of course it had instantly burned its way into my brain. My car closed the distance between our homes in about 20 minutes, but it felt like 20 hours. I was shaking so violently I had trouble driving, making erratic turns and stopping short at lights. The rush of adrenaline that had helped me fight back, then flee the scene was ebbing away, leaving in its wake acute pain. My shoulder ached fiercely from where Mike had wrenched my arm back. My wrist throbbed, and my throat felt like I’d drunk fire. Blinking away tears, shaking and disoriented, I somehow made it there.

Jax was standing in his garage, door open and waiting for me when I pulled up in front. I parked and stepped out warily. Every shadow seemed like it might be Mike waiting to leap out at me, as if he could somehow have beaten me there.

“Sky, what’s wrong?” Jax stepped forward, grasping my elbow to steady me.

“He’s coming,” I gripped his arm, looking up. “He’s going to come after you.”

“What? Sky, come inside. Let me get you something to drink.” He started ushering me in, holding me to his side, supporting some of my body weight and helping me walk. But now wasn’t the time to sit, have a drink and calm down. Now was the time to jump up.

“Jax, I need you to listen to me.” I pulled away in the garage, speaking urgently, low and serious. “I just stabbed Mike. But I don’t think I killed him.”

That got his attention. Jax stopped, both hands on my waist as he looked into my eyes. “Are you all right?”

“I’m…” I shut my eyes for a moment, my hand to my throat. Everything hurt, my wrist, my shoulder, my lungs. “I’m all right. I don’t need a doctor.”

“Are you sure?” Tension laced through his voice. “Did he hurt you?”

I opened my eyes again, needing to make sure Jax understood the situation. “He did hurt me, but it’s nothing that has to be dealt with right now. He found out you and I were texting and he flipped out. He was going to kill me—” I couldn’t help it, I broke off in a shuddering sob. The icy, murderous look in Mike’s eyes, the depths to which I knew, without a doubt, he was capable. I’d brushed so close to death.

“Sky.” Jax held me, his arms wrapped around my shaking body. Even through my shock, my pain, I could feel his body heat, take comfort from his closeness. But I couldn’t relax and enjoy it.

Pushing a palm up to his chest, I put some space between us. I had to keep my head clear. “He was hurting me, but I was able to grab a knife.”

“Where did you stab him?”

“In his stomach.” I winced at the memory, how squishy and easy the knife had gone in. I’d never physically hurt anyone before. I hoped I never had to again.

“And what happened? Did he pass out from bleeding?”

“No, he was bleeding, but he still had plenty of strength.” With a shudder, I remembered how he’d lunged for me. “I elbowed him and he slipped and banged his head on the counter. He went down and I ran.”

“Come here. You did good.” He hugged me again. I shook uncontrollably in his arms. “It’s going to be all right.” His voice sounded so calm and convincing, I was able to take my first deep breath since the fight. He kissed my hair and pulled me away, enough so he could look into my eyes. “Sounds like we have some time, but maybe not much.”

“He’ll want to kill you.” My stomach flipped with nausea again, knowing the truth of my words. “Should we call the police?” I knew I probably should have called from the apartment, at least 911 to have them send an ambulance for Mike. But all I could think about was fleeing for safety, getting away from there and putting everything behind me.

“We need to get you somewhere safe.” Jax put his arm around my back, ushering me into the house. “Come on in for a minute. I’ll grab a couple things. Then we’ll get out of here.”

Shaking, I followed him in. “I know it’s probably not right.” My voice had an edge of tears to it. “I just left him there, bleeding—”

“Sky.” He brought his hands to my shoulders and tipped my chin up to look at him. “He almost choked you to death. I can see his fingerprints on your throat. Thank goodness you were able to defend yourself. You did the right thing.”

I nodded, knowing he was right. I’d be dead if Mike had gotten what he wanted.

“You got away,” he continued, “but we need to get you somewhere safe. Then we can think about the police.” He grabbed a glass in his kitchen and filled it with water. After walking me over to the couch, he handed it to me. “Drink this and sit for a minute. And know that I mean what I say to you.” His tone grew serious as he gave me a promise. “You will be safe, Sky. I’m going to make sure of it.”

I felt sick to my stomach, dizzy, my brain crowded with pain and fear and panic. But I also felt the power of his words. Jax told me he was going to make sure I was safe. I more than believed him. I knew it was true.

But I did feel awful, showing up at his home bruised and desperate, telling him his life was in danger. I’d brought trouble to his door. He didn’t deserve to be pulled into this mess.

When he walked back into the room, he had his jacket and a grey duffel bag over his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” I spoke quietly, but he heard me.

“You have nothing to be sorry about.” He reached down, grasped my hand and pulled me up to standing.

“I do,” I insisted, unable to meet his eyes. “Mike’s crazy. He’s so violent. He’ll stop at nothing.”

“I don’t stop either, Sky.” He worked his strong fingers through my hair, cradling the back of my head. “I stayed away from you because you told me that was what you wanted. But now? I’m not going to rest until I’m sure you’re safe. You’ve suffered enough alone.”

Tears filled my eyes. I had felt so alone for such a long time. I’d grown so isolated, feeling like I was doing prison time, solely focused on my escape. But now it looked like I’d have company on my jail break.

“I’ve dragged you into a real mess.” I looked up at him ruefully, wishing I could change things, rearrange history, delete some choices and alter others. But that wasn’t the way life worked. Everything was connected. If I hadn’t married Mike, I never would have even met Jax.

“Any mess I’m in, I walked into it, eyes wide open.” He held me again, murmuring into my ear, “I’m in.”

I nodded against his chest. “OK.”

“Good. Now let’s get the heck out of here.” He grabbed my hand and led me back to the garage, loading his duffel into the back of the truck. “You need to drive your car and follow me until we can ditch it. Can you do that?”

“Yes,” I automatically agreed, tamping down the panic I felt at getting separated from him. It was ridiculous. I hadn’t even seen him for six months. Now I didn’t want to leave his side for a second.

“Not for long.” He looked all around as he walked me to my car.

“Where are we going?” I asked as I climbed into the driver’s seat.

“Somewhere safe. Stay right behind me.”

He didn’t peal out of the driveway, rubber shrieking to alarm the neighborhood. But he didn’t crawl out at a leisurely pace, either. I pulled out after his truck, sticking close at every light as we made our way to the freeway.

We were on the run, racing against time. Who knew where Mike was right then? In my heart, I knew he was up, alert, on the hunt. He might even be tailing us at that moment, following our every move, waiting for a vulnerable moment when he could strike.

My phone buzzed with a text.

Mike: GONNA KILL YOU JERK

I threw my phone down to the floor, shaking violently. We had to get away, far away, somewhere we’d leave no trace. I had no idea where that place could be. But I prayed Jax might.

12

Jax

After about fifteen minutes, we pulled off the freeway. Next to a gas station, I drove around in back of an office building. She could leave her car there. With any luck, it wouldn’t attract any attention for a couple days. That would buy us some time.

I bet the car was under Griller’s name, and he’d get the call when it was reported as abandoned. I didn’t bring it up with Sky, though. She didn’t need any more reminders of the dangers surrounding her.

I got out and walked around, opening the passenger door to my truck for her to climb in. “You got anything in the trunk? Anything you might need?”

“I have some cash in here.” She patted a black backpack as she climbed into the passenger seat. “I’ve been saving for the past year. But I don’t have anything else. I just ran.”

“That’s OK.” Everything in me wanted to reassure her, make her feel protected and safe. I’d never let Griller hurt her again. “We’re going to have to get rid of your phone. Any numbers on there you’ll need in the next few days?”

“Yeah.” She spoke slowly, seeming like she was still in shock as she took her phone out of her bag.

“Take a second and write them down. We’re going to have to smash and throw it out.” Griller almost definitely had GPS tracking on that thing. I handed her a sheet of paper from the glove compartment. With a shaky hand, she wrote down a couple numbers while I waited, keeping an eye out, wondering if at any minute I’d hear the roar of a motorcycle engine.

She finally folded the paper and handed me the phone. But as she did, it buzzed with a text. She gasped, her hand up to her throat as she dropped the phone.

“Sorry,” she panted, looking terrified. “He’s been texting me.”

“Easy.” I put a hand on her knee, feeling her trembling. Eyes big, she took a deep breath. “I’m going to keep you safe.”

Over by a dumpster, I took pleasure in smashing the phone with a rock and throwing it away. Griller couldn’t get to her anymore. I hated that he’d attacked her over having found our texts. It made me feel responsible.

Back into the truck, I got us out onto the freeway fast. It was better with her in there with me, but it was smart that we’d left separately, taking the step to hide her car. If she’d left it parked in front of my house, they would instantly have known we were together. Griller didn’t need any more help finding her than he already had.

I knew the power of an MC. I’d been surrounded by gangs and criminals my whole life. A motorcycle club was a brotherhood, with bonds thicker than blood. They made their own rules, beholden to no one but themselves. The guys would do anything for each other.

Even if one of them was a psychopath. All the Skulls knew Griller was crazy, but he was still a Skull. If he wanted revenge on his wife for cheating on him, it wouldn’t just be him trying to make that happen. He’d have an army of well-armed, ruthless killers flanking him, helping him achieve that goal. Sky was in a heck of a mess.

Which was why I’d called Zeke first thing. Leaving Sky on the couch in my house, I’d thrown a few things into a bag and given him a call. It had gone to his voicemail, but he’d get back to me soon. Until then, we’d head toward his house near Riverside, about two hours away.

The police wouldn’t be able to keep Sky safe. They couldn’t put her somewhere under 24/7 surveillance. Heck, I wasn’t even sure I could keep her safe. At least not right then, not until we could figure out a plan. But I knew who could. It meant going from the frying pan into the fire, but who knew a motorcycle club better than another motorcycle club? The Iron Reapers, sworn enemies of the Sacrificial Skulls, would be able to anticipate their every move, and, even better, counter them all. It was our best shot.

“How you feeling?” I turned to Sky. She’d been awfully silent since she’d climbed into the truck, lost in her thoughts. I was, too, as we traveled down the freeway at night. The drive shouldn’t take too long, but you never knew with traffic. Getting over near Riverside meant driving right through L.A. and the number of accidents, alone, could grind things to countless halts.

“I’m OK.” She sounded as if she were trying to convince herself as much as me. “I’ll be OK,” she added, as if she hadn’t done such a good job. She brought a shaking hand up to her hair, then dropped it again to her lap.

“It’s going to be all right.” I wanted to take her hand in mine, bring her onto my lap. Fear radiated off of her in a nearly palpable panic. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and drain it out, replace it with peace, comfort, security. But first of all I had to drive. Second, she hadn’t come to me because she wanted to be my girlfriend. She’d come because she needed help and wanted to warn me that I was in danger. I had to keep focused, stay fixed on the goal at hand.

My phone buzzed. I pulled over at the next exit to take Zeke’s call. I wanted a private minute to explain things, away from Sky. Parked by the side of the road, I climbed out and stood at the back of the truck as I called him back.

“What’s up?” He sounded tense. My news wasn’t going to change that.

“I’ve got a woman with me, beat up by a Skull.”

“Idiots.”

“She got away, but the guy’s still after her.” I paused, knowing I was burying the lead. If I mentioned it was Griller, Zeke would be all over it. But I had to talk to Sky before I did that. That information would set all kinds of wheels in motion, and she was the one who should make that decision.

For now, I just told Zeke what he needed to know. “The Skull’s her husband. And he’s after me, too.”

He groaned. “This is not good.”

“It’s not good,” I agreed. “I need your help. But there may be something in it for you, too.”

“S’all right. Don’t worry about it.” He dismissed my suggestion of reward, as if he found it insulting. Of course he’d help me out without getting something in return. But I knew there might very well be something to this situation that would interest Zeke quite a bit.

“I’ll put you up for the night,” Zeke assured me.

“Thanks, man.”

“When’ll you get here?”

“Little over an hour.” I ended the call, grateful for his allegiance. Zeke was a criminal. I had no illusions about that. But he was a criminal in my court, and right now that was what we needed.

Back in the car, I pulled us back out onto the road. I couldn’t see anything suspicious in the mirrors, but I also knew the Skulls had eyes and ears all over. It wasn’t Griller following us we had to worry about. It was some other guy in the club already out near where we were getting word. They knew the truck I drove. If they spotted us, it would not be good.

“Where are we headed?” Sky sounded afraid. I never wanted her to have to feel that way again.

“We’re going to spend the night over near Riverside. I have a friend who can put us up for the night.”

“But, what if Mike—?”

“Even if he follows us, which I don’t think he will, he won’t be able to get at us. My friend’s a Reaper.”

“Oh goodness, Jax. Are you sure?”

I didn’t like it either, mixing with one set of bad guys to evade another. But I did know Zeke would have my back, and that went for anyone I had with me as well. “We’ll be safe there for the night. And tomorrow, we can make some decisions.”

Some of that would be up to her. How far would she be willing to go to ensure her own safety? Griller was not a good man. He would not play by the rules. Would she?

I didn’t think Griller or anyone else was tailing us, but I still gripped the wheel tight the whole way. Each slow-down jacked up my pulse, sending it jumping like a racehorse held back at the gate. Sky sat at my side, pale and quiet, biting her nails and staring blankly out the window. I hoped she was right that she didn’t need a doctor. She should at least be icing that wrist I saw her massaging, or the shoulder she kept trying to move, then wincing. I hated not being able to do more, but I’d learned in crises, you couldn’t try to do too much. It was important to prioritize, figure out what mattered most in the hierarchy of needs. Right now, what mattered most was getting her to a safe location.

Zeke had lived in the same place for a couple of years. All of California was expensive, but his town was a little less so than mine and he’d gotten himself a sweet place. I knew it meant the same to him as it did to me to actually own a house. Having grown up with nothing, on the move all the time just like me, it felt important.

Only last week I’d put my house on the market. Since I’d cashed out of the bar, I’d been working on packing up, figuring out my next steps. I didn’t know where or what yet, but I didn’t want to hang on to my place. Renting it out would just be a headache. I wanted a clean slate, a fresh start.

Then Sky had showed up at my house, like I’d imagined her doing so many times. Only I’d never played out the scenario that actually happened, with another man’s red fingermarks around her throat. In my fantasies, she’d come to me because she couldn’t resist any longer. She’d missed me too much and her longing had overcome her better judgment. Reality was less romantic.

I snuck a glance at her and had to admit, even after all she’d been through that night, she looked beautiful. That long, soft hair, her full lips, her body’s rounded curves filling out her T-shirt and jeans. I was going to have to watch myself around her. After what she’d been through, she didn’t need some guy trying to hump her. I might be up for an all-nighter, a year’s worth of fantasies fueling my libido. But she needed a couple of Ibuprofen, an ice pack and a long, solid night’s sleep. I’d see that she got it.

After two and a half hours, I finally pulled off the freeway. “Zeke’s a good friend,” I assured Sky. “I’ve known him for years.”

“Will they be OK with me? You know, the wife of a Skull?”

“You’re with me now. If they have a problem with you, they have a problem with me.” That came out fiercely protective, but it was how I felt. And I didn’t like her referring to herself as Griller’s wife. I hoped that status was going to change fast.

“How do you know Zeke?”

I clutched the wheel. I’d figured she was going to ask me sooner or later, I’d just hoped for later. But, I also believed in being honest. “We did time together.”

“Oh.” She sounded a little taken aback, but she wasn’t leaping out of the car yet. That was a good sign. “When was that?”

“Back when I was 15. I was an idiot, dealing pot. Then I got caught breaking and entering. I was going through a rough time in my life, after the accident.”

“You were so young.” She was too nice, jumping in to excuse my bad behavior.

“Old enough to know better. But, anyway, Zeke and I were cellmates. He’s like a brother to me. A kind-of crazy brother, but still.” I shrugged.

“You can trust him?”

“Completely.”

“Then I’m really grateful you knew someone to call. I was going to head to the bus station, but I was worried Mike would find me first, or be able to track where I went.”

“Where were you going to go?” My stomach tightened at the thought of Sky all alone, heading off far away from me.

“Phoenix.”

“Why?”

“No good reason, other than that I’ve been there a couple of times. My mother lived there for a few years with her boyfriend. I guess I figured I could get an apartment, pay in cash and try to live quiet, stay off his radar.” She shook her head. “Now? I don’t know what I’m going to do. He’s never going to give up until he finds me.”

“Don’t worry about that right now.” I turned at a light, making our way into a residential area.

“Hard not to.”

“I know. But first you need some rest. We’ll have time tomorrow to sort things out.”

I pulled into Zeke’s place, relieved to see his garage open. I didn’t want to leave my truck outside all night, and he must have thought the same thing. Maybe he could help me switch out the car, or at least the plates.

“C’mon in.” Zeke greeted us, beer in hand, closing the garage door and ushering us into his house. “You want one?”

“Yeah,” I agreed, but first I wanted to take care of Sky. “You got any pain meds? And some ice?” Sky wasn’t complaining, but I knew she had to be hurting. Zeke led us into his bathroom where he had a regular pharmacy. Sky opted for the over-the-counter stuff.

“You sure?” I asked. The stronger stuff might do her some good.

She nodded. “It’s not that bad. I think I just need to get some sleep.” It was after midnight and she looked exhausted. Zeke grabbed a couple of ice packs from the freezer and showed us down a hallway to a large spare room with a couch and a bed.

“You guys can crash here. I’ve got a couple friends coming over later tonight. We’ll try to keep it down.” He gave us a wink, then closed the door.

“We can get you some more stuff tomorrow.” I unzipped my duffel and pulled out what I’d grabbed for her at my place, basically a toothbrush and a tube of toothpaste. “And here’s something you can sleep in.” I handed her one of my T-shirts, knowing she had nothing of her own. I didn’t think she’d noticed yet, but she had some blood on her clothes. When she changed, hopefully she’d be too tired to register the stains. I could try to get everything washed clean by morning.

Grateful and exhausted, she took what I gave her and headed to the bathroom. I spent a few minutes on my phone, letting Ace, my realtor and a couple others know I’d be out of town for a few days. I didn’t know how long this would take, but the less confusion I left in Cavallo, the quieter things would go for Sky. Luckily, I’d already cashed out of the bar. I could make protecting her my full time job.

I wasn’t prepared for the sight of her when she walked back in. Hair down in a loose tumble, her skin rosy and glowing from having washed her face, she smelled like lilacs. Seeing her in my shirt? Idiot. It draped along her curves, the neck wide enough to show her collarbone, the hem ending mid-thigh. Her legs looked so creamy and inviting, starting from her feet with her polished pink toenails all the way up to her bare thighs.

Swallowing, I tore my eyes away. She’d just been through massive trauma. The last thing she needed was someone pawing at her. I needed to remember that. And probably find a way to jack off in private. That would help. Because having her so close, wearing so little, with the added intimacy of seeing her in my T-shirt, as if we’d spent the night and now she was padding around completely naked save that? I was hard as a rock.

“Thanks, Jax, for everything.” She placed her clothes on a chair by the door and looked up at me with her big eyes, such an incredible shade of blue. Sky blue, I guessed it was, light and bright like she deserved her skies to look. She’d had too much stormy gray in her life. She needed more sunshine.

I looked away, running my hand over my head. I had about a month of hair growth on it, practically long, flowing locks from my perspective. I tried to focus on the prickly sensation on my palm, the door knob, my least favorite high school teacher, anything other than Sky standing so close, just a step away from gathering her into my arms.

“OK, then, if you’re all set, I’ll let you get to sleep.” I headed to the door.

“Are you coming back?” She sounded frightened.

“Of course.” I looked into her eyes, trying to reassure her. “I’m not leaving. I’ll just be in the other room with Zeke. When I come back in I’ll try not to wake you. I’ll sleep on the couch.”

She nodded, pulling back the covers on the bed.

“You want the ice packs? Or…” She shook her head no, climbing in, already looking moments away from sleep. I grabbed her dirty clothes and left the room before I could talk myself into staying right there by her side.

“You got a washer?” I asked Zeke, holding up the bundle of blood-stained clothes.

He walked me to it and waited until we were back in the kitchen and I had that beer I’d wanted before he asked, “What’s up?”

I drank half the bottle in one swig, and then gave him the high-level version, how I’d gotten to know Sky at the place where Ace lived, how her husband was a mongrel.

“And what’s gone down between the two of you?” he pressed.

I groaned and twisted off the cap on a second beer. “Not nearly what I wanted to. But enough.”

“So this Skull she’s married to, who is he?”

All through my story, I’d avoided naming Griller. I knew Zeke would take it and run with it. Griller had been on his hit list for a long time now. But that was a decision Sky needed to make. She should think it through and fully understand the ramifications of sharing that information. And of not sharing it.

“I’m going to get back to you on that one.” I tapped his beer bottle with mine, letting him know I meant it. “Tomorrow. I need to talk to Sky about it first, and before that she’s got to get some rest.”

Zeke looked me over, assessing the situation. With someone he knew less well—hell, maybe with anyone else—he might call trash. But with me, he gave me time.

“Tomorrow, you tell me,” he agreed. “Anyone else besides Skulls looking for her?”

“Nope.” There was a lot to that information, and both he and I knew it. Sky didn’t have anyone on her side. She had no well-connected father marshaling the police force. She had no concerned mother calling her every five minutes wanting to know her whereabouts. I was sure she had some friends, but maybe not anyone close. Knowing she’d been living in, I bet she hadn’t been able to let anyone get close.

“Idiot.” I exhaled, rubbing my forehead.

“We’ll figure it out.” Zeke was a good guy, telling me what I needed to hear. But he didn’t have a magic wand.

“I never should have walked away, left her alone with him. He could have killed her.” There in the kitchen, with Sky hopefully passed out asleep a few doors down, I let myself say it, expressing the anger and self-reproach that seethed within me.

“Maybe now we’ll kill him.” Zeke had just enough psycho in him that he gave me a grin after he said it.

Sky and I had a lot to talk about tomorrow. I didn’t know if she grasped the full nature of her situation, but I’d make sure she did. Griller would kill her if he got the chance. She could file a report with the police, but they wouldn’t be able to protect her. Griller and his brothers had each other’s backs. They’d keep searching for her, with a heck of a lot more zeal, influence and connections than the police. Once they found her, they’d make her disappear without a trace.

Zeke and I stayed up for another hour or so, until a couple girls came over for a late night party. “They’ve got friends a call away,” he offered.

“I’m good.” I made my way down the hallway, preparing for a long night on the couch. It would probably do me good to blow off steam with someone else, but I couldn’t do it. Now that I had Sky nearby after so long without her, I wanted to be as close as possible. Especially if she woke up and needed me.

That happened, around four a.m. Still in my clothes, I’d tossed and turned on the lumpy couch, trying not to be distracted by the smell of Sky or the sounds she occasionally made in her sleep, shifting and sighing. After punching the cushions a few times, I’d finally drifted off around three. But then, I heard Sky cry out.

On my feet in a second, I scanned the room, looking for the source of danger. I saw nothing. Then she moaned, “No!”, pushing at something invisible before her. She was having a nightmare.

At her side, I smoothed my hand along her forehead, speaking to her in low tones. “Sky, it’s all right. Everything’s all right.” She reached for me, pulling me to her side. I lay down next to her in the dark. She balled my shirt into her fist as I wrapped my arm under her shoulders, cradling her against me. I rubbed her back, feeling her breathing slow into an easy rhythm, the weight of her body settled against mine. She’d never completely woken up.

Tomorrow morning, she might not be thrilled to open her eyes and find me in bed with her. That might raise a few questions. Gingerly, lightly, I picked up her arm and lifted it, trying to ease away off the bed and back to the couch.

“Stay,” she murmured, clutching at me.

I settled back, head onto the pillow. Stay I would, for the rest of the night. With her luscious body draped all over mine, her hair strewn across my chest, her thighs parted over my own, I stared up at the ceiling and tried to think about coral reefs or algebra. But nothing worked.

She’d permeated my senses for months without any contact. Now that I had her literally on top of me wearing very little, I didn’t stand a chance. So I tried to let it be enough, just that moment, in the darkness with my arms around her. The sound of her soft breathing, the feel of her chest rising and falling, the lilac smell of her hair splayed across my chest. I didn’t know what the next day would bring. It might be all we had. I hoped the sun took its sweet time.

The next morning, she woke up before I did. When I opened my eyes, she was still lying next to me, though less like an octopus. She’d reined in her arms and legs. But I still had my arm around her, and our sides touched, sharing body heat.

“Morning,” she whispered, looking up at me, unsure.

“You had a nightmare,” I felt the need to explain.

“I thought so.” She sat up, moving away. I pulled the sheet from down around my legs up and over my chest. My huge morning wood still bulged through. There was no way she hadn’t seen.

“I’m sorry I woke you. I’ll go wash up.” She was in the bathroom quick as a jackrabbit before I could say another word. I rubbed my face, trying to shake the sleepy arousal I’d felt with her pressed against me, so soft and curvy. I’d probably freaked her out, waking up next to my huge erection. But I guessed it was better for her to be a little scared around me. I was a lot of man and I’d have a hard time holding back with her. I’d wanted her for so long, if I ever got the chance to actually be with her it would be like a raging storm unleashed. I didn’t know if I’d let her get up out of bed for days. It would be easier if she avoided me, stayed away. It would be easier for me to remember that she was still married, plus wounded and frightened. She needed tender love and care, not the kind of sweaty unbelievable beast like me couldn’t stop thinking about, her toes curling as I demanded orgasm after orgasm.

While she showered, I grabbed her laundered clothes. The stains hadn’t disappeared, but they’d faded, like her memory of the attack hopefully would. I laid them out for her and made sure I was in the kitchen when she came out. I didn’t need the image of her all wet, naked save a towel, burned into my brain. I could already picture it all too vividly in my imagination. Once I heard the click of the spare bedroom door, I showered, too, and, no, masturbating didn’t help. I prepared myself for basically staying hard 24/7.

Back in the spare room, she was waiting for me, hair brushed and down, looking so young and pretty as she sat on the couch. Business, all business, I reminded myself. We had a psychopath and his blood brothers out looking for us.

“How’re you feeling?” I asked, taking a seat several feet away on the chair over by the door. Plenty of distance between us, I still felt our chemistry like an electric pull.

“Strangely good.” She rolled her shoulder, the one I’d seen her massaging last night. “I should probably take some more Ibuprofen, but I’m feeling a lot better.”

She looked a lot better, too, with more color in her face. The marks on her throat had faded. They wouldn’t be as dark a bruise as I’d feared. It still infuriated me that that piece of trash had put his hands on her. But that would be the last time, I swore it.

“We need to make a decision. About how far we want to get in with the Reapers.” I laid it out for her. Option A the two of us could head out that morning and drive, probably down to Mexico. I had my passport and I knew some guys who could set her up with one. “It’ll take a couple of days, but once we’re over it’ll be harder for him to find us.”

“But, what then? We hide in Mexico? Until when?”

I shrugged. “That’s an open question.”

“He knows a ton of guys down there. The Skulls do all kinds of deals with cartels and gangs. I’ve tried to stay out of it. I never wanted to know, but I still heard enough. Mexico’s a big place, but it’s not like we’d be dropping off the radar.” I knew all that, and I was glad she did, too. It made it easier to lay out option B.

“There’s another way.” I looked her in the eye, wanting her to fully comprehend all the implications. “I haven’t told Zeke who your husband is. Not yet. But I can. And they will be interested. Very interested.”

“They don’t like Mike.”

“That’s an understatement.”

She nodded, looking down at the bedspread. Her hands clasped tight on her knees.

“I can tell them and see if they want to get involved. My guess is they will. And they may want you involved. The game will change. It won’t be just him looking for us. We’ll be looking for him.”

“And if we help them find him?” She looked at me, still holding her voice level and steady.

“I think you know they’re not going to sit down and play Monopoly.” They’d kill Griller, make him disappear the way he would Sky if he found her first.

“Tell them,” she answered, straightaway. “Tell them and see what they want to do. This needs to end.”

“You sure?” It was a big decision. I happened to agree with it. It was the only way to make Griller go away for good. Otherwise she’d have to live on the run, change her identity, always keeping one eye looking over her shoulder. She’d never have a moment of peace, and someday it still might all end the way Griller wanted.

She ran her fingers lightly along her neck, feeling the tender spots where Griller had closed his hand around her throat, strangling her. Looking me straight in the eye, she gave me her answer, “I’m sure.”

I stood up, knowing what I had to do next.

13

Sky

It was only four p.m. and already I was pacing around Zeke’s house like I’d been caged there for weeks. It hadn’t even been 24 hours yet, and I’d slept a good eight of them. But Zeke and Jax were out talking to some of Zeke’s Reaper brothers, and I wanted to know what was going on.

I wasn’t alone. Before they’d left, Jax explained to me that a couple guys were out front. They’d stay parked in the car, leaving me be, unless they saw anything suspicious. Then they’d be all over it.

I poured myself a glass of water, then let it sit untouched on the counter top. I checked the clock over the stove, frustrated at the lack of change in the time. With a glance of disbelief, I realized I was still wearing my wedding ring. Why hadn’t I taken that off yet? I tore it off my finger and threw it into my backpack. Satisfying as it would be to throw it out, even better would be some extra cash in my pocket when I got a chance to hock it.

Glancing at the TV, I knew I could flick it on. But there was no way I could focus on it when I had so much on my mind. I’d already known, before Jax had laid it out for me, there were only two ways this could end. Either Jax and I would die, or Mike would. He wouldn’t quit for anything less.

I knew him too well. I knew what he was capable of, and how he thought. He’d see this situation as black and white, I’d done him wrong and deserved to die. And he’d present it like that to his brothers. I’d cheated on him with Jax, that he was clearly convinced about, and there was some truth to it. Not nearly as much truth as I’d wanted. But Jax and I had crossed the line. Mike would never forgive and forget. He’d get revenge in the most satisfying way he knew how.

I didn’t feel good about going to the Reapers, but I’d seen the Skulls in action for years now. They had a whole bunch of dirty cops on their payroll. It seemed to me like no one in the club ever ended up on the wrong side of the law unless the president wanted it that way. If they got on the big guy’s bad side, then they’d be grateful if all they got was some prison time. At least that way they’d still be alive.

I didn’t know what the Reapers would want me to do, what role they’d ask me to play in going after my husband. But I knew even before I heard what it was, I’d do it. It was Old Testament of me, an eye for an eye, and if it were just me involved I might be more reluctant. I might choose a life of hiding and fear if it were just me suffering.

But Jax was involved, too, whether he wanted to be or not. It wasn’t like he could open up some bar in Mexico and live his life out in the open for the rest of his life. I didn’t know if it would take a month, a year, or more for Mike to get wind of his whereabouts, but he’d do it. The thought of that evil, vile man getting the better of a man like Jax? I couldn’t stand it. This needed to end.

Finally, around five o’clock, Zeke and Jax came back. Zeke put some beers into the fridge and Jax set down two large pizza boxes on the counter.

“Hey.” Jax smiled when he saw me, moving like he was about to give me a hug. I wanted that so bad my body ached. But he held himself back, merely placing a hand on my shoulder. “How you doing?”

“Fine,” I lied, not telling him I felt like jumping out of my own skin. He could probably tell just by looking at me anyway. “How’d it go?”

“Good. It went good.” He turned and started getting out paper plates. He seemed tight-lipped and tense, but that seemed reasonable even if the meeting had gone well.

“He’s going straight to the top tonight.” Zeke clapped Jax on the back, the slap resounding on Jax’s leather jacket. “The big man.”

Jax looked at me and explained, “I’m meeting with the club president tonight. He wants to hear more about it.” In response to my worried look, he added, “It’s a good thing.”

“He’s got to get involved with something like this.” Zeke held up a beer, looking over at me and giving it a tap to ask if I wanted one. This time, I said yes.

“But don’t worry, Sky. You’re in good hands.” He elbowed Jax and Jax elbowed him back. I got a glimpse at their teenage selves and it made me smile.

“Hey, look. There it is.” Jax beamed at me, taking a step closer when, again, he halted.

“What?”

“You’re smiling. I haven’t seen that in months.”

I kept smiling, but down at the floor, shy. Jax always noticed little things like that about me. I couldn’t deny how special he made me feel, like there was something rare and wonderful about me that he could see. I didn’t even feel that way about myself, so it humbled me, the way he observed and praised.

Zeke flicked on a big flat screen TV and the three of us got comfortable on his leather sectional sofa. Some stupid prank reality show was on. I barely paid attention, sitting so close to Jax. I felt aware of his every move, the heat radiating off of his body, the way he stretched his arm along the back of the sofa behind me.

Last night when I’d shown up at his house, I’d been so distraught his presence had barely registered. That was the first time I could say that. I guessed it took multiple physical injuries, nearly killing someone, plus fearing retaliation at any moment to overpower my attraction to Jax. But there I was, the following night, with the old familiar feelings surging through me.

No one had ever affected me like Jax. I’d liked boys since the sixth grade, had plenty of crushes and then a couple of boyfriends before I met Mike. They all paled in comparison, like ripples in a pond instead of a tidal wave. He made me shake, the taut outline of his bicep, the corded strength in his forearm. Even the width of his thighs, so powerful, next to me on the couch. As frightened and unsure about everything as I felt, arousal coursed through me.

I’d almost gone ahead and kissed him when we were in bed together. Waking up with his giant cock pressing against my inner thigh, I’d come so close to leaning in and bringing my lips to his throat. He smelled so good and felt so hot and hard and it had been so long since I’d been near him.

But then I’d remembered the last time I’d seen him. He’d been walking along the street downtown, looking like he didn’t have a care in the world with a leggy blond. She’d tossed her hair back and laughed like Barbie at a pool party. They’d looked good together. He’d looked relaxed, content. I hadn’t really ever seen that in him. Around me, he always seemed wound up and intense. But I’d seen a whole other side to him in that moment downtown. And it had made me pull away from him in bed.

We sat together on the couch, one show bleeding into the next, until Zeke said they should probably get a move on. Jax rose to head to the bathroom. Zeke picked up our used paper plates and brought them to the kitchen. Which meant I was the one who saw Jax’s phone when it buzzed with a call.

I didn’t mean to snoop, but his phone lit up and it was right next to me. I didn’t touch it, try to swipe and answer it. But I did look down into exactly the same blond, smiling face that moments ago I’d remembered seeing. There she was, next to me on the couch, buzzing away on his phone. Apparently her name was Nikki. Supes fun!

My stomach twisted up, and I stood just to get away from her image. He probably hated being away from his girlfriend. Cheeks burning with embarrassment, I wondered what she must think of all this mess. How had he described it to her? A friendship with some woman who looked after his grandfather that got a little out of hand. Nothing much had even ever happened between us, but her husband had flipped the heck out anyway. Jax was probably dying to get back to her, counting the hours until he wrapped this up for good.

“OK, you sit tight. A couple of guys are outside keeping an eye on you.” Jax and Zeke pulled on their jackets, looking like two badasses going to meet with an MC prez. I guessed that was what they were. “You going to be all right?” Jax gave me a lingering look as I stood in the kitchen.

“I’ll be fine. Probably watch some more TV and get to bed early.” I didn’t meet his eyes.

“Good. Don’t worry about anything, it’s all going to work out.”

I nodded, tightly, guessing he was reminding himself as much as assuring me. He had a whole life to get back to, with his bar and his girl.

“Oh, and I’ll pick up a phone for you. One that can’t be traced.” He paused a moment, as if he wanted to do or say something more.

“Let’s get a move on.” Zeke led him into the garage. He followed without saying anything more.

The next five hours seemed like the longest of my life. No phone, nothing to bake, not able to leave the house, I thought I’d lose my mind. I showered just for something to do. I flicked through movies and shows, nothing capturing my attention for even a fraction of a second.

What were they doing? What was the conversation they were having like? Was it going well? Was Jax safe? Maybe I should have gone with him, or at least offered? I’d tried to handle this all on my own, leaving Mike without any help. Now it looked like things were happening the other way around, with Jax doing all the maneuvering and planning. I should be a part of things.

I guessed I should also be feeling some burden, a heavy weight over my soul. They weren’t talking about bringing Mike to justice under due process of law. There would be no trial. They were talking about meting out their own version of justice, an eye for an eye. A finger for a finger. The thought popped into my head, unbidden, along with what I’d seen that night at the club. The image of his laughter, his boastful, proud face as he showed off some guy’s bloody finger, that filled me with more certainty than even the memory of his heated attempt to kill me.

It was the sociopathic laughter, the disassociation of his cheerful demeanor with the graphic, disturbing evidence of extreme violence that hardened my resolve. Mike needed to taste the fruit of his labor. He’d been a bad man for a long time. It was time to stop him, by any means necessary.

Finally, around midnight, I managed to drift off into a troubled sleep. Images of Nikki danced through my dreams, her laughter, light like a balloon drifting off up into the summer sunshine. Meanwhile I sat in the dark, weighted down with pain.

Tormented, my eyes opened around three a.m. I looked for Jax on the couch but it was empty. Were they still out meeting with the Reapers’?

The light was on in the hallway and I tiptoed toward it. Maybe he and Zeke were up in the living room. I could go ask what had happened.

I didn’t hear voices, no sound at all except the roaring rush of water coming from the adjoining bathroom. Drawing closer, the door slightly ajar, I could hear that someone was taking a shower. Probably Jax.

I should have turned around and headed back to bed. Maybe it was because my nightmares had been so dreadful, pulling and pushing me around like demons, but I stayed there, at the door. And I nudged it open an inch more.

Inside, the bathroom was steamy. But I had a direct view of the shower. And what I saw wasn’t a curtain. Zeke’s house was pretty tricked out. I guess sometimes crime did pay, because he had a pretty high-end glass shower. It gave me quite a view.

Jax had his back turned toward me. I’d known he was muscular. You’d have to be blind to not pick up on that fact. But seeing him naked took my breath away. His shoulders rippled with definition as the water pounded down along them. His torso formed a perfect V, the broad width of his back tapering down to his hips and then, dear God his rear. Round and muscular and sculpted, I couldn’t look away.

And then I realized what he was doing. He groaned and shifted slightly, turning to rest one of his palms against a shower wall. The other palm was moving, back and forth, stroking his thick, hard cock.

I bit my lip. I should go. I shouldn’t be there in the hallway spying on him. What if he looked up and saw me? The way he was turned now, he could catch me if he glanced at the door. But I couldn’t move. I was fascinated, riveted, watching him stroke himself, bring himself pleasure.

I couldn’t help it, it made me throb so much to see him. I slipped my hands down, past the hemline of the T-shirt I wore—his T-shirt, tempting and surrounding me with his scent. I slid inside my panties, parting my legs and moving my fingers down to find the part of me that ached. I had to stifle a moan when I felt how wet I already was, watching him, seeing the tension build in his body. His muscles so hard, bulging in the heat. The pace of his hand increasing, the way his lips parted slightly as he leaned over his hand.

I matched his movements, circling my clit, stroking my slick pussy, pushing my hips into my fingers. I pressed against the doorframe, clutching it with my free hand, both supporting myself and stopping myself from walking inside. What would he do if I joined him? So aroused, so close to cumming, would he welcome me into the wet heat? Would he idiot me hard with that huge cock of his, parting my legs and pushing me up against the wall, making me scream it felt so good?

His buttocks clenched and he groaned, low and throaty, as he started to cum, spurting out in thick jets I wished I could taste. My own shudders climaxed, seeing him there, joining him as orgasmic ripples of pleasure tore through my body. Trying to bite back my moan, closing my eyes it felt so intense, I couldn’t be sure exactly what I heard him say. I was distracted, caught up in my own orgasm, but I thought I heard him say something as he came. Over the rush of the water, the blood pounding in my ears, I could have sworn I heard him groan, “Sky.”

Sucking my breath in, I took my hand out of my panties, almost feeling like I’d been caught. But my furtive glance over to him didn’t reveal anything other than him standing, still now as he leaned heavily toward the wall, forehead against his hand. I took my ‘get out of jail free’ card and ran with it, padding swiftly barefoot back to the bedroom. I threw myself into bed quicker than a teenager about to get caught for sneaking out.

Covers up and over me, head turned into the pillow, all lights off, I presented a convincing portrait. At least, I hoped I did. Jax came in about ten minutes later, and I could smell him, freshly showered. I wanted to run my hands all over that delicious body, see if he’d missed any drops in toweling off. I’d catch them with my tongue.

But I lay there, forcing my breathing to stay slow and steady, my eyes to remain closed. I could hear him stub his toe in the blackness, swear softly, then make his way to the couch. He sank onto it, over 200 pounds of muscle and man. He turned and shifted, trying to get comfortable.

I could invite him into the bed. It would be polite, considerate, helpful. Or I could offer to sleep on the couch instead. I felt embarrassed I hadn’t insisted on it. Last night I’d been so tired I barely remembered falling asleep. But tonight I could tell him we should switch, that it made no sense for him to suffer on that lumpy couch. His feet probably dangled off the end of it, but I’d tuck myself in easy.

But I didn’t because I didn’t trust myself. My body still tingled and glowed from my orgasm, the one he’d brought me to, watching him so glorious and naked and animalistic, stroking the biggest cock I’d ever seen. Plus I kept thinking about the moment —possibly imagined, but there it was, lodged in my brain nonetheless—when he might have called out my name. The thought that he might want me as much as I wanted him? That would not make for an easy transition, me lying neatly down on the couch while he climbed into bed. That would inevitably lead to fumbling in the dark, my hands reaching out, twisting, pulling, kissing. So I kept my eyes closed, and eventually my fake sleep turned into the real thing.

§

The next morning, I found Jax in the kitchen drinking some coffee. The clock on the stove read 10:15.

“I can’t believe I slept so late!” I brought my hand to my face, rubbing my eyes. “I never sleep this late.”

“You’ve got a lot on your mind. And it’s good for you to sleep.” Jax poured me some coffee. What a man, not even asking first. Add that to the list of reasons why it was getting harder and harder to keep my hands off of him.

“Thank you.” I took the mug from him, grateful. His glance slid from my face, down my body where I still wore just his T-shirt and panties from the night’s sleep. I probably should have slipped on my jeans first. I’d jumped up, wondering what time it was when I’d awakened to sunlight streaming through the window.

He looked away, seeming almost pained. “How’re the injuries today? Wrist? Shoulder?”

“Better.” I rolled my shoulder, finding it still sore but nothing another day of Ibuprofen wouldn’t help me through. I hadn’t told him I’d gotten hurt there. But he must have noticed me favoring it, in that observant way of his.

“And your throat?” He watched as I ran my hand over my neck.

“I’m good.” I swallowed, feeling no pain. I’d been lucky that night, so lucky I’d been able to defend myself. He could have done so much worse. “How did it go last night?”

“They’re interested, like I thought they would be.” His gaze met mine, his dark, intense eyes drawing me to him. “He wants to meet you.”

“Who? The president?” I’d figured they might want me involved in some way, but I hadn’t expected that. I’d barely even met the president of the Skulls. But, then again, MCs weren’t exactly all about the bring-your-wife family picnic. And Mike had kept me more and more isolated, telling me it was for my own good.

“Yup. Tonight, they’re having a party and they want us to come.”

“Huh.” I looked down at the T-shirt, feeling suddenly nervous about a great many things but fixing on one. “I don’t have anything to wear.”

“Yeah, Zeke’s having a girlfriend bring some clothes over.”

“That’s nice.”

“You’re nice, Sky. None of the rest of this is.”

I sipped my coffee, waiting for him to tell me more.

“Here’s the deal tonight. They want to size you up. Make sure you’re not screwing with them.”

“But, I wouldn’t—”

“I know that, Sky. And Zeke knows that, which goes a long way. But for a wife of a Skull to come to the Reapers, they need to know you mean it.”

I nodded. Of course, they’d want to make sure they weren’t getting led into a trap. “What do I need to do?”

“Be yourself. Be honest. And I think…” He paused, running his hand along his head. Every time he did it I felt jealous. “I think it would help if it seemed like we were together.”

“What?” I wasn’t sure what he meant. Together, together?

“They trust me. I’m in with Zeke. If you and I are together, they’ll see the whole picture.”

“So, together, like—?”

“Like you left Griller for me.”

I laughed nervously, the truth of those words so close to what I’d actually wanted to do. “Sure, OK, we can pretend to be a couple. I bet Nikki won’t like that much, though.” I hadn’t meant to mention his girlfriend. It had just sort of popped out.

“Nikki?” He looked at me like he had no idea what I was talking about.

“You know, your girlfriend?”

“I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“I saw the two of you together. Back a couple of months ago, downtown. And she called last night. I swear, I wasn’t trying to, but I saw your phone.”

“We did date, for a couple months. But it was nothing serious, Sky. And it ended in January.”

I nodded, suddenly feeling too emotional to say anything. I’d built so much up in my head over Jax, attached so much meaning to our every interaction. When I’d thought he had a girlfriend, it had hurt but it had felt like a protective layer, a coat of armor preventing my dreams from coming true. But there he was, standing next to me, completely single.

“So you’re not seeing anyone?” My voice came out a near whisper.

“No, I’m not.” The seconds dragged out between us, the silence gaining significance as it stretched and grew. “Sky.” His voice sounded lower, husky. “I know this is all crazy. You’ve been through so much.” He reached out his hand and touched my shoulder. It could have been a friendly, reassuring pat, nothing more. But it didn’t feel that way to me. And looking up into his eyes as his hand lingered, caressing my arm, hand down against my bare skin, it didn’t feel that way to him either.

The doorbell rang like a shriek, splitting us apart.

“Goodness,” Jax muttered as he went to answer it.

“I have a special delivery!” A girl sauntered in with a large shopping bag filled with clothes. She looked around my age but she was wearing much more makeup and much less clothing. And I only had on a T-shirt.

“Thanks.” Jax took the bag from her, sounding gruff.

“You should have stayed out with us longer last night.” She turned her full attention to Jax, trailing a manicured nail up his chest. “We had a lot of fun. But it would have been funner with you.”

“Thanks.” I gave her a quick wave as I headed out of the kitchen, resisting the urge to jerkily inform her that ‘funner’ wasn’t a real word. “I’m going to go wash up.” I didn’t want to stay and see her wrap her tentacles all over Jax.

If what she was wearing was any indication of the kind of clothes she had in that shopping bag, I was going to go to the party dressed like a hooker. And not the expensive kind, the kind with an hourly rate and an angry pimp. Only the man by my side would be Jax. While we pretended to be a couple.

Looked like we were in for an interesting night.

14

Jax

Standing in the kitchen, Zeke let out a low whistle of appreciation. I looked up from my phone and nearly dropped it.

“I think it’s too much.” Sky squirmed and wiggled in a skimpy miniskirt, only succeeding in working it further up her thighs. Any shorter and I’d see exactly what I wanted. “I don’t think I can wear this.”

“It’s perfect,” Zeke told her. I still couldn’t seem to speak. I managed to swallow, with difficulty, but I needed a minute before I stood up from the kitchen stool where I sat. She looked so hot it nearly made me lose my mind. A thin, stretchy, strapless top barely covered her full breasts. No way was she wearing a bra. Her midriff exposed, the skirt clung to her curves, starting low and ending high. To top it all off, she wore idiot-me boots with high, stiletto heels. No, I would not be standing up any time soon.

“It’s the best I could find in the bag. But…” She pulled at her top, bringing it up to cover more cleavage. As she did it, she exposed some of the creamy underside of her breasts. I think I may have drooled onto the counter.

“Aw, you should have given us a fashion show. Modeled all the outfits.”

I growled at him, still locked on Sky but letting him know I didn’t like what he had to say. “Easy there, big guy.” Zeke laughed, but he needed to know I wasn’t playing. “You gonna be all right tonight?” he asked, clapping me on the back. “Some of my boys are going to like what they see.” He jutted his chin toward Sky. My Sky.

“No one touches her,” I barked, ready to fight anyone who tried.

Zeke still chuckled, like he saw something funny. “Then you better keep your hands on her at all times. Or someone else will step right in.”

“Forget they will.”

“All right. Let’s get a move on.”

Zeke had a couple of sweet bikes, ones he’d worked on with love and talent over the last couple of years. He let me take my pick to ride over to the party. To the uninitiated, that might not sound like much. Imagine a father letting you take one of his babies for the day. That’s what it meant to Zeke.

He gave Sky a spare leather jacket, and dang if it didn’t make her look even hotter. Like she was my woman. Astride one heck of a chrome chopper, I looked over at Sky, waiting for her to climb on behind me. That skirt was going to ride up mighty high once she had a bike between her legs. She’d need to press herself up real close against me.

I thought I heard her mutter, “Phoo,” as she climbed on, stilettos and all. I reached my hand around, pressing it to her low back. “You hold on tight.”

She nodded and did as I told, parting her thighs and pushing her body against mine. Seeing her bare legs against my thick thighs did things to me. Tentatively, she slipped her hands around my waist. I pulled at them, bringing her arms firmly around me, locking her hands together right at my core. One large palm over them, I pressed her into me, telling her with my touch. There. That was where she belonged.

She held on and we sped off, following Zeke on the dark city streets. It was a warm night, not quite April but who gave a blasted about seasons in So Cal. The party was only a couple of miles away, but I wanted it to be a couple of states. I could ride with Sky behind me the rest of my life. She fit there like the puzzle piece I’d been missing all these years. I almost kept on keeping on when I saw Zeke turn into the club. But eyes on the prize, I reminded myself. If this all played out right—and that was a big if—Sky and I would get plenty of time together to do whatever we wanted.

“It’s no Ace Bar,” Zeke commented as we headed toward the entrance, loyal to a fault. “But the owner owed us a favor, so we got the place for the night.”

The place was swanky, with a kind of old-school glam/mobster vibe. The walls had large black and white canvas photos of James Cagney, Marlon Brando, plus a couple of the real deals, gangsters from the prohibition era like Al Capone, all wearing suits and ties and up to no good. Lots of gold-painted trim, mirrors and not much lighting, the place was tailor-made for bad guys and the women who loved them.

Without me, I bet Tommy was going to turn Ace Bar into something similar, minus the gold trim. Me? I was glad I’d cashed out. I wanted to be my own man, no handing over my club on a Thursday night because the head of the local MC told me to do it. You got too close and they owned you.

Which was why we had to play it just right tonight. I didn’t like getting in bed with these creeps, but above all I was a realist and I knew it was our best option. But we needed to make the agreement air-tight, no lingering loopholes, no IOU chits anyone could cash in for years to come. If Sky and I gave them what they wanted, they needed to turn right around and give us what we did. Case closed.

A waitress in short shorts and nothing but pasties up top came over.

“Good to see you tonight.” Zeke gave her a kiss on the cheek. They might know each other in the biblical sense. They might have never met. You never could tell with Zeke, he was so smooth.

“What can I get you?” She gave him a kiss back, then offered me a flirtatious smile. “You know everything’s on the menu.”

I tightened the arm I already had around Sky’s waist, looking down at her, not thrilled about taking her to a place like this. I wanted to treat her right, make her happy and relaxed, not show her off in a room of women wearing even less. Not to mention the men, Zeke’s Iron Reapers brothers, all of whom seemed to be looking over at Sky, undressing what little she had on her with their eyes.

“The big guy could use a strong drink,” Zeke tried to lighten the mood, giving me a look. I knew he was right. I needed to loosen up and make nice with the big dogs, not growl at them like we were fighting over a bone. “And how about a cocktail for you, Sky? What’d you like?”

Drinks ordered, Zeke ushered us into the crowd, introducing us to anyone and everyone. I recognized Cotton, the jumpy guy he’d brought out with him to Ace Bar a little over a year ago. He still looked like he was itching for a fight, even in the middle of a party with his own club.

I put on my game face, schmoozing like the former bar owner I was. I could talk to a hole in the wall if I needed to, and with some of these guys it might as well have been. Sky stayed glued to my side, my arm around her like a giant gorilla. That was exactly where I wanted her, her sweet softness pressing against me. The brush of her hair on my arm, the light sound of her voice when she answered the occasional question. I must have come off like the big, possessive idiot that I was because no one made a move on Sky. They must have read my body language correctly. I’d rip their arm off if they so much as thought about it.

“You doing OK?” I asked Sky, rubbing her back, her waist. She was wearing so little, it was a good thing I had an excuse to keep my hands on her at all times. I would have been hard pressed to do otherwise.

“Glad I’m with you.” She sounded tense.

“I got you,” I reassured her, kissing her head, breathing in her scent.

We stood and mingled, but my attention stayed fixed on Sky, my hands caressing the curve of her hip, lightly grazing the swell of her rear. Over the past year, I’d exerted so much energy to keep away from her. But now we had to put on a show, convince everyone we were a couple. I had to touch her, and I was up to the task.

Apparently, Sky was up to the challenge as well. She melted into me, her hand up to my arm, pressing against my chest. She had to convince them she was offering up her husband, she was with me now. She was doing a good job. I didn’t know if Sky was just performing for the audience or not, but she was convincing me. The way she looked up at me, it was as if she, too, felt drugged by our closeness.

“Let me bring you over to meet Texas.” Zeke started leading us over to a private booth. He’d told me about Texas earlier that day. He was second in command, a guy to watch and impress. “Prez is in back, but he’ll come find you when he wants.”

Texas sat, big and wide as the state after which he was named, his girl on his lap. He didn’t rise when Zeke brought us over, just nodded for us to sit. I slid into the booth, then decided, what the heck. Might as well take advantage of the opportunity. I pulled Sky right onto my lap, my hands on her hips, settling her rear right where I wanted it. She sucked in her breath at the contact, as hyper-aware of me as I was of her. I rubbed her back, massaged her neck, and she leaned into me. This was supposed to look like how we were all the time.

“You’re Zeke’s guy,” he grunted, squinting at me across the table. The place was so dimly lit, especially in the booth.

“We go way back. Did some time together. He’s like a brother to me.”

He nodded, accepting the truth of that statement. “And this here’s your girl.” He turned his scrutiny on Sky. I did not like it. Even with a woman on his lap, he looked way too interested in Sky. But I sat still, knowing I wouldn’t let him do anything to her I didn’t want him to.

“Hear you used to be Griller’s old lady?”

“Used to be. Not anymore,” Sky responded, tough and determined, exactly as she needed to. I knew she spoke from the heart.

“That piece of trash.” Texas turned and spat on the floor. “He killed my dog.”

“Oh my goodness, I’m sorry.” She sounded shaken.

I rubbed her arm. “We all want the same thing. No one here’s a fan of the guy.”

Texas returned his attention to me. I could see the wheels turning in his brain, assessing our relationship, the situation. On impulse, I leaned down and kissed Sky. The moment my lips met hers, I forgot we were doing it on display, to make a point. All I knew was her lips tasted like honey and her tongue twined with mine.

“You traded up, girl, that’s what you did.” Texas’s voice broke me from my haze. He gave Sky an approving nod as he settled back into the booth, drawing his girl closer. “Here’s to that idiot getting what he deserves.” He held up his glass and we all drank, sealing the deal. We’d convinced him. Now all that was left was the Prez.

Texas turned his attention to the woman on his lap. It only made sense that I did the same. I nuzzled Sky’s ear, giving her a little lick on her throat. Her breathing picked up and she squirmed against me. Her skirt rode up so high I saw most of her thighs. I brought my hand to her bare skin, caressing her, loving how she responded to me.

With her wearing next to nothing, pressed up against me, I was hard as a rock. I was sure she could feel it. I wasn’t trying to hide it. Hand on her hip, I rocked her into me, and she gasped, her lips parting.

“Kiss me,” I whispered in her ear. I didn’t care if it was just for show anymore. I needed to feel her lips on mine again. She tilted her head up, leaning in and I ground her against me, capturing her mouth, her heat.

“You two enjoy yourselves tonight.” Texas and his girl worked their way up and out of the booth. We barely noticed, so wrapped up in each other. We had the booth to ourselves, in the darkness. Under the table, my hand crept up higher. Every inch of her body sang to me with arousal, from the flush in her cheeks, the glisten of her lips, to the push of her nipples, braless, against her thin, strapless top. Was she wet, too?

As I slowly inched my hand up her thigh, I told her, “You’re driving me crazy.” She clutched my shoulder, grasping my shirt, panting as she kissed my throat.

“Jax.” She twisted against my lap, wriggling along my cock.

“Are you wet, baby?” I stroked my fingers closer, further up her thigh. Grazing them lightly along the silk of her panties, I found my answer. She closed her eyes, whimpering at my touch, soaked right through. “So wet for me,” I murmured, drugged with desire.

Her slick heat beckoned me, the smell of her, the feel of her on my fingertips. I felt almost dizzy, drunk now that I was so close to exactly what I wanted. Looking down, I could see her generous cleavage, her breasts straining against the top, her nipples aching, pebbled tips. She gripped my shoulder, turning into me as I pushed her panties to the side and started to stroke her under the table, sure and firm, finding her throbbing clit and giving it the attention it deserved.

She bit her lip and moaned into my chest, her fingernails digging into my skin, her body rigid with arousal. The need to make her cum incensed me, flooding my senses.

“You feel so good,” I murmured

“Jax,” she panted, so eager, so close, but anxious, too. Anyone could discover us, come over and see what we were up to. We were in public.

But I kept at her, under the table. In the corner, tucked into the booth of a dark club, we could get away with it. And with her orgasm so close I could almost feel it already, I couldn’t stop even if I tried.

She struggled. “Jax, this is...” Her thighs quivered, her rear rubbing along my cock. Her slick arousal coated my fingers as I picked up the rhythm. “What if—?”

“You can cum for me, baby,” I coaxed her, with my words and my fingers. Her chest heaved as she whimpered. “Just me. No one will know. Show me how good it feels when I do this.” I curved my fingers, hitting the spot that made her tilt her head back, her eyelids fluttering closed for a second as she bit back a moan.

I knew I was being wicked, tormenting her, forcing her to orgasm, but I was a man possessed. I didn’t know what the future held. Nothing was settled between me and Sky. That might be the one chance I got.

With a gasp and a shudder, she quaked under my fingers, stilling for just a moment as I pressed against her clit. I swept her lips into a kiss, drinking in her cries as she came, my fingers buried deep up inside her soaking wet pussy. She bucked her hips, her eyes closed to an avalanche of pleasure.

“That’s it, so good,” I murmured as her orgasm crested, then subsided. She rested her head on my shoulder, sighing against me.

Rosy, shy, she shook her head. “I can’t believe we just did that.”

“I want to make you cum every day of the rest of your life.” I held her to me, not caring how intense that sounded, how quickly I’d level jumped with her. I’d felt that way for a long time. It was time to say it out loud. She shivered and swallowed, looking up at me with a tear forming in her wide eyes.

“Jax.” Her voice sounded hoarse with emotion. I kissed her, my hand at the back of her neck, caressing her hair.

“OK, you two. Time to follow me.” A massive guy with a leather vest and an eye patch towered over our booth. I was glad he hadn’t arrived a minute earlier. Swiftly, under the table, I helped Sky adjust her skirt, then slid her to the inside of the booth. I stood up first, blocking the modern day pirate’s view as Sky rose and straightened herself out some more.

We followed him down a dark hallway and into a small back room with a couch and two chairs, perfect for back room deals. A big, grizzled guy with some gray in his beard sat in an armchair. From the flinty way he looked at us, plus the way his bodyguard stood right behind him at all times, I knew he was the president.

“Have a seat.” He motioned to the couch. We both sat down, my arm stretched around Sky, letting her know I had her back at all times.

“Zeke has told me about an interesting opportunity,” he began, crafty and cagey. He recapped what he knew, clearly having been briefed on every conversation I’d had with a Reaper over the past 24 hours. I’d let them know we could lead them to Griller, details TBD. But I had yet to tell them what we wanted in return.

“I can tell you’re a smart guy,” the Prez said to me. I listened, impartial, not letting it go to my head. With a guy like him, he wasn’t just making a compliment. He was laying groundwork. “Let’s say we can take him out. What makes you think it won’t start a war?”

I’d thought about that question, and I had my answer. “Because Griller’s more trouble than good for the Skulls.” He watched me, waiting. “I’m sure you have a Griller in your club,” I continued. “A guy who does the dirty work and does it well. A little too well. Guys like that, they’re loose cannons. They’re only good until they aim the wrong way. And that day comes.”

“So you’re telling me they’ll let him go?” He arched an eyebrow as he rolled himself a cigarette. He didn’t necessarily sound incredulous, just not convinced.

“Griller’s a liability. He’s a hothead. He can’t be controlled. They’ll let him go.”

He sat back, licking the paper on his cigarette. Then he gestured over to the door to the giant who’d led us over. “You know how he got his eyepatch? Griller took it out. With a spoon.”

I felt Sky shiver against me and I squeezed my arm around her. She’d spent the last four years with a monster.

He leveled his gaze at Sky, then at me. “What’s in it for the two of you? You running off like Romeo and Juliet?”

“Yup.” I stared right back, and I didn’t even have to fake it. It was what I wanted. “Only neither of us wants to end up dead. If we get you Griller, here’s what we want in return.” I leaned forward, making sure he understood that I meant what I said. “We weren’t involved. No Skull will ever know we gave up Griller.”

He nodded, lighting up his cigarette. “You were never here.”

“That’s right.”

He puffed and blew out smoke. “Gonna take some doing.”

I nodded. No need to sugar coat it. None of the logistics had been worked out. But it was how the deal would have to go down.

“We get Griller. You get your freedom.” He outlined the deal.

“That’s it.”

He nodded, then stretched out his hand to shake mine. “You got my word. Come through on your end, I’ll come through on mine.”

He stood up, a lean rangy man. Looking at Sky, he mused, “Don’t know how you made it out alive, married to a piece of trash like Griller.” He gave that grizzled smile again, having amused himself. “And I say that as one sick old idiot myself.”

He headed to the door flanked by his bodyguard, and we started to rise as well. “You two sit tight. I want to talk more about all this with you.” He gave me a nod. “I’ve got to go take care of something. You make yourselves comfortable.” He motioned at his bodyguard. “I’ll be sure this guy knocks first when he comes to get you.” He chuckled to himself again, then left.

I gathered Sky into my arms, pulling her onto my lap. This all had to be so hard on her, hearing about what Griller had done, knowing how high the stakes were, how much was getting agreed on to go down. I was prepared to just hold her, let her cry if she needed to. But that didn’t seem to interest her at the moment.

Hands up on my shoulders, she straddled my thigh, grinding on it as she kissed me, urgent, fevered. I kissed her back, surprised but more than happy to go that way instead. She pulled up my shirt, kissing my chest, clawing at me and moaning as I pulled down her top, freeing her breasts. I brought her up against me so I could feast on her, licking her soft, creamy mounds, sucking on her nipples as she moaned.

Her hand found the bulge in my jeans, traveling the length of my cock pressing into my zipper. I groaned as she undid the button, pulled down the fly, and reached her hand down, her warm fingers closing around my shaft. I’d fantasized about having her on me, ready to go, as worked up as me on so many nights. Turned out, reality was even better.

As she began to stroke, I closed my eyes, tilting my head back, losing myself to the rhythm and heat of her hand. When I opened them again, she’d shifted position. She got off my knee and got down on hers, right between my legs.

“Sky.” I caressed her hair as she licked her lips, eyeing my cock like it made her drool, like she’d been wanting to lick it as much as I’d been craving the exact same thing. But I wanted her to know, she didn’t have to do it. Some girls thought of going down on a man as a chore, and I didn’t want her feeling like she had to satisfy me just because I’d gotten her off in the other room. “You know you don’t have to.”

“You don’t want this?” She wrapped her hand around my length and stroked. She looked up at me, her mouth so close to my crown, her tongue ready to give it a lick.

“I didn’t say that,” I answered hoarsely. My hands gripped the couch, fisting the poor cushions. I didn’t want to lose it and wrap my palm around her head, forcing her mouth down on me to suck me down deep. But I could imagine how good that would feel.

“What if I want it?” She reached out and gave my cock a long, slow lick like it was a delicious treat. “Mmm.” Taking her tongue and moving it slow, she circled my head, savoring it, sucking it and groaning with pleasure.

“Goodness.” I tipped my head back, eyes closed for a moment. I loved looking at her kneeling between my legs, mouth open and wet around my crown. But I needed a second.

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” she moaned, licking and sucking me further into her mouth. I had to be making it up, the strong drinks going right to my head. But I knew I wasn’t fantasizing, because even my fantasies hadn’t felt this hot, this right. She took me in, inch by inch, sucking me down her throat. She licked around my tip, touching the sensitive underside, playing with it, giving me a smile before taking it all down again.

“Sky,” I groaned, breathing hard, feeling like I was going to cum any second. I brought my hand to her head, caressing her hair, trying to be gentle but I felt like I was going to explode. “I’m going to cum.”

“Yes,” she purred, looking up into my eyes as she deliberately took me deep down her throat, showing me exactly where she wanted it. I couldn’t help it, her look of desire, her ready, willing tongue sucking and stroking, I thrust into her. Her eyes went wide as I filled her mouth, clutching her hair in my fist.

I groaned low, cumming down her throat, holding her face to my cock as she drank it down eagerly. Sucking, milking every drop, she wanted everything I had to give. I kept on giving, bucking into her mouth, cumming what felt like buckets into her hot, needy mouth.

Finally spent, I sank back onto the couch, hand up to my head. “What the heck?” I barely knew what had just hit me. Sky, so sweet, my pie-baking, care-taking, kind-to-the-elderly crush had just given me the best blow job of my life. She’d been so into it, moaning and sucking me like she couldn’t get enough, like she’d gotten turned on by getting me off.

“C’mere,” I managed, gesturing for her to come up onto my lap. She scrambled up, complying happily, snuggling against my chest. “That was amazing.”

I felt her smile, heard it in her voice when she told me, “I loved it.”

“You did, huh?” Had I died and gone to heaven? Was there a chance she was as eager to get down and dirty with me as I was with her?

“You taste so good.” She ran her hand along my chest, kissed me on my throat. “You feel so good.”

Her nipples stood out hard in her skimpy, braless top. So erotic, she almost looked pornographic sitting there on my lap, her large breasts straining against the thin, stretchy fabric. I reached up and caressed, stroked. She shivered, straining into my hand, wanting more.

That mini skirt of hers barely covered anything, and it rode way up as she sat on me. I rested my other hand along her thigh, tracing my fingers along her silky skin. “Slip off your panties for me,” I whispered.

With a shy, flirtatious look into my eyes, she started shimmying them off her hips. Down they went, past her ankles, onto the floor where they belonged. She giggled, suddenly self-conscious as she wriggled back into my lap, her legs clasped together.

Hand at the back of her neck, I held her, stroking her, letting her know I had her. I’d keep her safe. She could let herself be vulnerable, open up, reveal everything to me. “Your pussy’s so sweet,” I murmured into her ear, my hand up to circle her breast. “Show it to me.”

With a whimper of surrender, she shifted on my lap. My cock stirred under her rear. Slowly, she parted her thighs.

“Look how wet you are,” I murmured my approval, gazing at her glistening pink sex, swollen and gushing with need. “Looks like you liked going down on me.”

“I loved it,” she moaned, opening her thighs wider as I stroked them. She panted at my touch.

“Oh, Sky,” I murmured, running a hand up her leg as I circled her nipple. “We’re going to have so much fun together.” Lightly, teasing, testing, I pinched her aching nipple through the cloth. If she didn’t like it, I’d lay off. I could be more gentle with her. If I had to.

I didn’t have to. She groaned, her lips parting, her back arching as I deepened the pinch, twisting her nipple in my thick fingers. She didn’t like it. She loved it.

My fingers close to her dripping pussy, her thighs wide apart, I dipped my head down to her nipple to take her into my hot mouth. I wanted to play with her, test her reactions. Discover what she liked. If she moaned at a pinch, how would she like a bite?

But a knock sounded at the door. First soft, then a loud, insistent rap.

“All right. Time to go.”

Straightening up, I groaned in frustration. That was right, we were in a nightclub trying to strike a deal with ruthless, amoral killers to get rid of Sky’s husband. How easy it was to forget the details.

Sky sat up as well, looking drugged and dazed. “Time to go?” she asked, as if she, too, had forgotten everything but our connection.

“I have to go talk to the big guy again.”

“Oh, right.” She shook her head, trying to clear it. I helped her stand and straighten out her skirt. It felt wrong, her clothes were supposed to be coming off, not covering more of her. But the time for that was not now. “I wish you didn’t have to go.” She echoed my thoughts.

“Me too.” I zipped myself up, kissing her head. Seeing her panties thrown on the floor, I balled them up and put them in my pocket.

“Wait, Jax—” She reached for them, sounding embarrassed. “I still have to walk through the club.”

“I’ll walk you out and get you a ride home,” I assured her. “I’m going to keep these for now. Until the next time I can taste you.”

She smiled, allowing me to open the door and guide her out. I hated the guys checking her out, their eyes glued to her luscious curves. Mine, I wanted to growl, wanting to punch them all. But none of them touched her, and I didn’t need to be starting fights, so I just steered us straight for the exit. Outside, Zeke already had two guys waiting to escort her home, then stay outside the house making sure she stayed safe.

“I’ll be back soon.” I kissed her again, one more time, quickly, promising her what I hoped more than what I knew.

She nodded, then disappeared into the back seat of the car.

“They’ll get her home safe,” Zeke reassured me, turning me back into the club. “Dang, I’ve never seen you have it this bad.”

“Anything happens to her, I’ll kill the guy responsible.”

“Like I said.” Zeke shook his head. I didn’t even try to argue.

15

Sky

I made it back to Zeke’s no problem. I let myself into the empty house, knowing I might be alone but I was not unguarded. The two Reapers who’d driven me home would stay out front making sure I was safe.

But I wouldn’t truly feel safe again until Jax came back. I still felt drunk off him, could still taste him on my tongue, feel the way he’d made me cum so hard. I took a long shower, savoring the heat, touching myself under the flow of the water. I didn’t make myself orgasm again, though. That I wanted to save for him, show him what he did to me.

No one had ever rocked my world like that. No one had even come close. Just his hands on me as we stood talking to other people had made my entire body tingle. Maybe it was all the buildup, months and months of aching. But that could go either way. I’d had a crush on a boy in high school for a long time. Then, the night we’d finally kissed, he’d licked my face like a sloppy dog. Too much anticipation could simply lead to a huge let-down.

That hadn’t happened with Jax. The feel of his large, rough hands on my skin, it sent shivers through me just remembering the heat of his touch. Under the table, the way he’d reached under my skirt, how he’d talked to me. I was usually so shy about public displays of affection, could never forget that someone might be watching. It usually dampened any possibility of arousal, but with Jax? He’d turned it into something edgy, made me feel so naughty. When he’d coaxed me, telling him to cum just for him, I think I might have orgasmed just from the suggestion. He was so masterful, the way he stroked me, played with me.

I ran the warm spray of the shower over my breasts, my nipples still stiff. He’d gotten me so worked up. I couldn’t believe I’d gone down on him, right in the back room of the club. I’d never been so forward, so bold. Maybe it was the adrenaline of the moment, knowing we might not have too many other chances together.

I knew we were playing with fire. We had been all along, our attraction pulling us together even when so much should have kept us apart. Now, we were making a deal with the devil, shaking hands with the Iron Reapers to do away with a Sacrificial Skull.

And not just any Skull. My husband. We were still married. I’d taken off the ring, but that didn’t change our status. And there I was, handing him over, probably about to play an active role in arranging his death.

That probably made me a bad person. But I couldn’t see any other way. And he’d certainly left a trail of destruction in his wake. It wasn’t just me he’d hurt. He’d killed a dog? Scooped out some guy’s eye with a spoon? What the heck? He was deranged. Maybe he’d gotten worse over the years I’d known him. I could tell myself that.

I shut off the shower and toweled off, blow-drying my hair so I wouldn’t go to bed with it wet. And I hoped Jax might come home before I slipped into the sheets. That way we could do it together.

But he didn’t get home. I got into bed by myself, turned out the light and breathed in the scent of him from the T-shirt of his I wore. I touched myself some more, still slick and aroused from our night. He’d tasted so good, felt so amazing in my mouth, down my throat. I’d never enjoyed giving a blow job before, but with Jax I’d craved doing it.

Down on my knees between his legs, watching his face overwhelmed with lust, hearing him groan as my tongue swirled over his head, I’d gotten close to cumming myself. I wanted to do it again to him, and again, playing with different rhythms, strokes, watching his every reaction, figuring out everything about him to give him the greatest pleasure.

When I woke up in the morning, he was passed out on the couch, still in his clothes. I thought about waking him up, and all the ways I could do it. He looked so gorgeous, such a blend of tough and tender as he lay there in his badass, muscled six-foot-three body sound asleep.

But, I suddenly felt shy. What we’d done last night, it had been crazy, wild. Forced into playing roles, we’d both gotten caught up in the heat of the moment. The adrenaline, the danger, we’d gotten carried away and maybe that was all it meant to him. Maybe I was the one attaching so much to it, feeling like my heart now beat solely for him.

I pulled on my jeans and headed to the bathroom to wash up. In the kitchen, I made some coffee and ate some cereal by myself. I bet Zeke and Jax had stayed out really late. On the counter, I noticed a phone. Underneath it, on a piece of paper someone had written “Sky”. It was probably the phone Jax had said he’d get for me, the one that couldn’t be traced. I’d wait until he woke up to ask him for sure. The last thing I wanted to do was lead anyone to us.

At last, around noon, Jax made it out of the bedroom. I brewed a fresh pot of coffee, the one I’d made a couple hours earlier long gone. We didn’t have much food in the house, but I made him some toast and buttered it.

“Thanks, Sky.” He drank a few big glasses of water and downed the toast and coffee.

“How’re you feeling?” I asked, still feeling somewhat shy. Last night I’d taken his cock into my mouth and eagerly drank down his cum. Standing there in broad daylight, that now seemed slightly embarrassing.

He nodded. “It was a late one. But I’m good. Let me fill you in on everything.” Heading back down the hallway, he beckoned me onto the couch in the spare bedroom. “Come here.” He patted the cushion next to him.

I sat and he put his arm around me. “How’re you feeling?” He kissed my hair, my forehead, and it felt so good to be in his arms. But there was still a lot left unsaid.

“I’m all right. I was worried about you, out with those guys.”

“Aw, Sky, I can handle myself.”

“I know that.” I blushed. I was more than sure he could handle himself in all kinds of situations. “I just meant—”

“It’s nice to have you worrying about me.” He rubbed my shoulder and I instantly felt better. Then he stopped his hand, drawing it back to rub his head like he did when he had something he was mulling over. His voice grew businesslike when he spoke next. “OK, I need to tell you everything. They want to use you as bait.”

“Bait?” That sped my heartrate up to about a thousand beats per minute.

“Bait.” He exhaled. “I tried to talk them out of it. But I see what they’re thinking. Even if I don’t like it.”

“Bait,” I repeated, trying not to sound panicked. The image I pictured, of a wriggling worm pierced by a sharp hook, didn’t calm me down.

“You got to know, I will be by your side every second.” He turned and looked at me, piercing me with his dark, intense gaze. It made me relax, if only the slightest bit. “See, Griller’s got to see you and not realize it’s a set up. You’ve got to go someplace where he’ll see you and follow you. He’ll think he’s onto you, like he’s tailing you, trapping you. Then you can lead him right to the Reapers.”

I was sure my face had gone ashen pale. “There’s no other way?”

“We went over all kinds of ideas last night. We could send him a message, tell him if he wants you, he should head here, that kind of thing. But with any kind of warning, he’ll bring back up. It’ll be a Skulls/Reapers shoot out. We need him alone.” I nodded. That much I understood.

“We could set him up to see me,” Jax continued. “Maybe let him think he’s caught me getting into a car. But there’s still a good chance he’ll be suspicious, wary it’s a trap. He knows I’m friends with Zeke.”

“He’ll call for back up.” I saw it as he explained it. “But he won’t necessarily do that with me.” I could follow his line of reasoning before he even said it. “He’ll be so angry when he sees me he’ll be like a bull seeing red. He’ll just want to murder me.”

“But I won’t let that happen,” Jax reassured me, rubbing my back.

“Plus, he thinks I’m stupid.”

“Not sure I’d put it that way.” But he didn’t contradict me.

“It’s true. He doesn’t think much of me. He never has. Might as well use that to our advantage.” I shifted on the couch, a plan materializing in my head. “If we can set it up so he sees me getting into a car, he’ll tear after me and just want to get it done.” I could picture the look in his eyes when he’d strangled me, cold and furious all at once. We could use that to our advantage, his insane urge to kill. He wouldn’t be rational at all if he saw me.

“Yeah, I don’t like it.” Jax shook his head, “but I have to agree. He’ll fall for it, if he sees you.” He reached up and stroked my hair, so much comfort and assurance in just one touch. “If we do it this way—and I’m not saying we definitely are—can you think of anywhere he could spot you? Where you know we’d run into him but he wouldn’t suspect it was a set up?”

“Yup.” I replied instantly, knowing exactly where we could find him. “Outside his girlfriend’s apartment downtown. I know where she lives. I’ve seen him heading upstairs with her. But he doesn’t know that, so he won’t suspect a thing.”

“That’s perfect,” Jax agreed, then added, “You’ve seen him with her?”

“Have you?” Something in the way he said it tipped me off that he had.

“Yeah. They’d come into the bar together.”

I exhaled, remembering how trapped and miserable I’d been for such a long, long time. But that time was over. “I guess I knew for a while he was with someone else. But then, yeah, I saw them together.”

“It’s been hard for me not to punch the man every time I saw him walk into my bar,” Jax admitted, cracking his knuckles. “Anyway, it not my bar anymore. I’m glad I cashed out of that place.”

“You cashed out? Of Ace Bar?” That was the first I’d heard of it.

“Yeah, I haven’t told you?” I shook my head no. “I guess we’ve had a lot going on.” He laughed briefly at his understatement. “Yeah, I cashed out of my partnership with Tommy, about three weeks ago. I’ve got my house on the market, too.”

“You do?” I didn’t know what to make of it. “But, why? Where are you planning on heading?”

“Haven’t got that all figured out yet. I guess now that’s a good thing. All I knew was it was time for a fresh start.”

“Yeah, I’ve been feeling the same way.”

He looked down at me, his fingers playing with my hair, his body heat radiating into mine where we touched, our arms and thighs brushing against each other. He made me feel so feminine, and such a perfect fit with him. Just sitting next to his muscular thighs made me want to twist, wrap my legs around his, straddle him and kiss and rock against him.

“We should probably head back up to Cavallo.” His voice sounded thick and deep when he spoke. “Stay at a hotel tonight.”

“Cavallo?” My heart started beating, anxiety flooding me.

“That’s where this has to go down. And we tore off in the middle of the night. I need to get back to my place and grab a few more things. I can have the rest of it packed up. You probably want some things, too. I like what you were wearing last night, but that might be hard to pull off every day.”

I blushed, remembering how very little I’d worn last night, and what he’d taken off me. Did he still have my panties?

“Yeah, clothes would be nice. And I’d love some of my photos and baking dishes, but really?” I’d honestly figured I’d have to kiss all that goodbye. My need to get away from Mike outstripped my desire for my possessions. “Don’t you think that’s taking a crazy risk?

“Not if we do it right. We have to start tailing Griller, shadow his movement, figure out when and exactly where we can get him to see you. I know a guy we can send into your apartment. If you get him a list of stuff you want, he’ll slip in, grab it all, get out in ten minutes.”

“Sounds like quite a guy.”

“I’ve never said I’m a saint, Sky. You’re the one who told me I was a good man. I never claimed to be.”

I remembered every moment of that conversation we’d had in the supply room. Did he? “Do you mean, when we—”

“Yes, when we were folding sheets. And I almost kissed you.”

“You did?” I blushed, knowing last night we’d done so much more but still, to hear his admitting his attraction had gone back that long. I knew mine had started way before then.

“I’ve had it bad for you for a long time, now, Sky. I know things heated up between us last night at the club. And maybe you were just getting into it, playing the part—”

“Jax.” I interrupted him, shaking my head. “Could you really think that? As if all this time I’ve been indifferent to you? And then I just got carried away?”

“It’s hard to think straight around you, Sky. Not much has made sense about the way I feel about you, not from the start.”

I inched closer, needing to tell him. “I used to look forward to Monday when I’d see you. It was my favorite day of the week, knowing you’d come into see Ace.”

“I started coming in more than that,” he recalled. “It was hard to stay away from you.”

“I thought about you all the time. Your texts made me so freaking happy. It was ridiculous.”

“I tried not to.” He reached out, stroking my hair, holding it between his fingers. “I tried to stay away, do the right thing.” I didn’t realize I was crying until he brushed the tear from my cheek. “Hey, don’t cry.” He tipped my chin up, looking into my eyes.

“I just…” I swallowed, feeling overwhelmed with emotion. I’d fought against loving him so much. I almost couldn’t wrap my mind around letting it go. Almost. But I got there. Sliding my arms around him, I leaned up to kiss.

We sank into each other and Jax brought me onto his lap, against his chest. I kissed him with everything I’d felt for so long, kissed him like I never wanted to stop. I reached down along his arms, feeling the strength in him, more than just muscle. He was a strong person, caring for and protecting me.

I wanted his shirt off. I’d seen his back in the shower that night, but I had yet to get to touch his bare chest. I wanted to lick every one of his tattoos, kiss my way down every line.

“Hey, you two love birds.” A knock at the door sounded along with Zeke’s voice.

“Idiot,” Jax groaned, leaning back. “I forgot. We’ve got someone coming by. They’ve got a car for us. Want to talk through the plans.”

Reluctantly, we pulled apart and headed out to the front of the house. I let Jax do most of the talking. I knew I was a key part of the plan, the lynchpin, the bait, but the Reaper guys honestly gave me the creeps. I didn’t like how they looked at me, or how twitchy one of them seemed, a guy named Cotton.

But it didn’t take long. And they loaned us an SUV, black with tinted windows. For spying, I realized. We’d stakeout Mike in that car, watching his moves, plotting to lure him into a trap. Good thing I didn’t have much time to think or I might have gotten nervous. We packed up, a process that took me all of ten seconds, since I had nothing.

“Good luck, man.” Zeke and Jax hugged. “Glad he has you,” Zeke said to me, giving me a brotherly hug.

“Thanks for putting us up.” He seemed like a good guy. He’d come through, exactly like Jax said he would.

“Anytime.”

We climbed into the SUV, got ourselves some more coffee at a drive-thru, and started on our way. It was hard to keep my hands off of him in the car. Every shift he made in his seat, no matter how minor, caught my attention. I kept finding myself gazing over at him, his thick biceps, his corded forearms as he gripped the wheel. Remembering last night, I practically had to force my head to turn away, not stare at the bulge in his crotch. It had felt so good sitting on his lap, grinding on him. I’d loved taking him in my mouth, sucking and licking, drinking down his cum.

But he didn’t say much on the drive and neither did I, both of us lost to our thoughts, a heck of a dangerous situation waiting ahead of us. About twenty minutes outside of town, he pulled off into a nondescript hotel. It hit the middle between seedy and luxury, the kind of place business people might stay in for a conference. It was a smart choice. I was sure Mike and his buddies had never set foot in it.

“This OK?” he asked before getting out of the car. “I’d take you somewhere nicer, but I want to stay off the radar.”

“It’s perfect,” I assured him. “I know this isn’t a vacation.”

“But, maybe someday.” I nodded, knowing there was a lot to that statement. And a lot we had to navigate between where we were at the moment and some potential future together.

Jax checked us in while I stayed out of sight in the car. He used cash, keeping us off the grid. We only had his duffel, which he shouldered up to our room. It was non-descript, with a small sofa, a desk, and a large bed. I pulled apart the outer layer of curtains, keeping the thin, filmy ones shut for privacy.

“I’ve got to make a couple calls. You OK for a bit?” I nodded, and bided my time while he stepped out, flipping through TV channels while my tension built. We were going to spend the whole night together in a hotel room. Just him and me. We were about to start a stakeout and launch a highly risky attempt to lure a killer into the hands of other killers.

There were times in life to play it safe. I’d kept my hands to myself—mostly—for months and months. But Jax and I had opened Pandora’s box the night before. I had no interest in closing it. I didn’t even think we could if we tried.

Finally, the door opened and Jax returned to me, so big and tall in his fitted black t-shirt, a hint of a tattoo making its way past the sleeve. I rose, walking toward him. He looked at me with exactly the same heated intensity burning up his gaze.

“You hungry?” he asked, gruff and low.

“Yes.” But it wasn’t for food. We fell into each other, passion erupting as he captured my mouth with his. A deep groan from his throat, a moan from mine, I couldn’t get close enough, couldn’t touch enough of his body, his skin. Panting, I pulled at his shirt. I needed it off. He broke away, but only to lift up my top, then his. Something ripped, I didn’t know what it was or how it had happened.

All I knew was his chest was bare and I licked it, kissing and savoring his muscles, running my fingers along his tattoos. My mind wasn’t working right, too fevered to process what I saw, I just knew it was ink on his skin and it drove me crazy. I’d only seen hints of his tattoos, past the sleeve of his shirt, in the shower through the steam. Now he was mine to devour. Fingernails digging into his shoulders, I couldn’t help using my teeth, my tongue, pulling at him, wanting more.

His chest should be illegal, a rippled wall of muscle, so hot and hard. I pressed my stomach to his, the feel of our bare skin touching for the first time nearly sizzling my mind. My skin felt like it was burning, his touch, his tongue fanning the flames as he devoured me, caressing my throat, my stomach, my breasts.

Somehow trying to pull at the waistband of his jeans, only on one foot as I wrapped a leg around his thigh, we lost our balance, stumbling backward. Crash, down went a lamp off a table. I glanced at it, not moving away from him for even an inch. No pieces of glass, nothing looked broken.

“It’s fine, fine,” Jax panted, his hand cupping my chin, bringing my mouth back to his as he drank me in, tipping my head back, walking me over against the window. Pressing me against the curtains and glass, he ground against me, his fingers pulling at my bra. Even that was too much between us, and I moaned with delight when he snapped it off, threw it to the ground and palmed my breasts in his hands.

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long.” He groaned, pulling at my hair, making me gasp as he licked my throat.

“I’ve wanted you even longer.” There was no way he’d yearned for me the way I had for him. It felt like I’d wanted him, wanted this forever. Clumsy with lust, I struggled to unbutton his jeans, unzip his fly and slide them down his hips. That bulge in his boxer briefs, so tantalizing, so huge, I reached down and stroked. His body tensed, clutching my breast with an animalistic sound from deep in his throat.

“In that supply room,” he panted, “when we were folding sheets. I wanted to do this.” Mouth down to my nipple, he enclosed it in his wet, hot heat. I cried out it felt so good, the way he sucked and licked, a slight bite to my tender tip. He gripped my rear, grinding into me, searing my skin with his kisses.

“I wanted to go down on you.” I licked his massive shoulder, swirling my tongue along his tattoo the way I’d wanted to do to his cock.

“I wanted you the first time we met.” He undid my jeans, slipping them off me as he placed a trail of kisses down my stomach, along my hips, down my thighs. I knew he probably meant when Ace moved into the home. But I’d wanted him even before then, the first time we’d ever met. I was about to say so when he said it instead. “When you came by Ace bar.”

Kneeling down, he slid his palms between my thighs, opening me, kissing and stroking my skin until he drew a finger along my panties, right where I’d soaked through. I cried out, quivering, not sure my legs could hold me up through what it looked like he was about to do.

He kissed me through the wet silk, eyes closed, licking, savoring me. “Sky,” he groaned, pulling my panties to the side, then ripping them off. “So sweet,” he whispered, gazing at my slick pussy like he’d never seen anything more luscious. Tongue out, he gave me a lick, growling with satisfaction at my taste. Like a tiger with a meal, he sucked at me, licking, pushing my thighs apart so he could get at me more. Eyes rolling back in my head, I grabbed onto his shoulder, up at the curtains, something, anything to help me stay standing it felt so good.

With a rip and a crash, the rod came out of the wall, the gauzy curtains billowing down around us. Disoriented, I pushed at it. He stood up, laughing. “Come here.” He wrapped his hand around my waist, pulling me out of the mess while he closed the outer shades. We might be trashing the room, but we still needed our privacy. We weren’t done yet.

I wrapped my hands around his biceps, kissing his pecs, his abs. He was like an anatomy lesson I’d have no problem studying for hours on end. Hands down to my hips, he drew me to him and together we tumbled to the floor, his body catching my fall as I splayed across him. Squirming on top, straddling his thigh, I bucked against him. Rolling my hips, I licked his nipple, bit his throat. He gripped my rear, moving me against him, thrusting back. His cock pushed into my lower stomach, so close, and I was so dripping wet I knew he’d slip right in. Trembling all over, I slid down, grinding my clit along his shaft, wanting him inside me, knowing it was going to feel so good.

“No,” he groaned, “bed. Should be bed.” He pushed himself up on his elbows. All I knew was his cock was no longer where I wanted it and I whimpered in protest. But he scooped me up and brought me over, laying me out gently on the mattress. “It’s our first time.”

He stood gazing at me, stripped down to his boxers. They rode so low his tip was coming out the top, glistening with precum and some of my own arousal. “Sky.” Hand up to his head, he stared at me like I was a work of art. “You’re so beautiful. All that time I was picturing you, I was wrong. You’re even more gorgeous than I ever—”

“Come here.” My voice hoarse with lust, I reached for him. He could worship me all he wanted. Tomorrow and the next day and the next. Right then, I needed to unwrap him like a present. Over at the side of the bed, I rolled his boxers down his hips. He stepped out of them, his huge shaft bobbing free.

Now it was my turn to stare, transfixed. Veins running along its thick length, it twitched as I looked at it. I swallowed, licking my lips, remembering how I’d taken him in my mouth the night before. Seeing it now, about to take it deep inside me, I had to wonder, could it fit? He was huge. Reaching out, I ran my fingers down his length, rubbing the cushion of my thumb to his sensitive tip.

The muscles in his throat flexed as he watched me. He caressed my hair, eyes drugged with desire. Hand to my shoulder, he pressed me down, laying me back to the bed. “I want to be inside you.”

“Yes,” I cried, desperate for it. “I need you, Jax.”

Reaching inside his jeans, he pulled out a condom. Watching him roll it on, I knew he did it all quickly but it was taking too long. My legs twisted, hips writhed with impatience.

Stretched out on top of me, every inch of him so hot and hard, his skin seared into mine. Gasping, kissing, I couldn’t get enough, couldn’t decide which part of him to press and grab. I wanted this, that, every slope and plane. I needed all of him all over me.

I looked up at him, into his face as he gazed down at me and it hit me hard, how many times I’d fantasized about exactly this moment. The two of us, intimate, alone, nothing between us.

“You have no idea how many times I’ve thought about this.” He voiced my thoughts.

“Yes, I do,” I murmured.

The head of his cock settled at my entrance and I widened my legs, biting my lips, inviting him in. “I don’t want to hurt you.” He paused. “I’m not sure I can be gentle.”

I looked up into his eyes and brought my hand to his cheek. “I don’t want you to be gentle. Idiot me, Jax.”

With a groan and a thrust, he entered, spreading me so wide my eyes opened big, watering. I’d never been with anyone so huge. He went slow, pushing in, pulling out, a bit at a time, pushing deeper and stretching me. His toe was so thick and long, I grabbed at his arms, trying to breathe and adjust. Looking up I could see him holding his breath, the muscles corded through his arms as he held back, restraining himself.

I wanted more. I moved my hips, pushing against him, so slick I moved easy along his cock. It hurt, but I wanted it and I showed him, moaning, opening my thighs wider, thrusting up to take in every inch.

“Idiot,” he groaned, leaning down, starting to pump into me, giving me more power. “You feel so good. You’re so wet.” He held me open with his hand, pushing my thigh up and back, positioning me as he moved. Riveted, he looked down at where we joined, his cock sliding in and out. Up on my elbows, I wanted to see too, his hips moving as he thrust all the way in and out, back and forth, faster.

He looked so huge, massive above me, the definition of masculine with his broad chest and his muscles flexing. I took his rhythm and met it, leaning back into the mattress, wanting it harder, faster. Digging my fingers into his rear, I groaned his name. Leaning in, he started pounding, driving into me, pushing me up the bed until my head tapped the headboard. Clawing at him, at the sheets, I moved my hand up to push against the wood, giving us more friction, more purchase so he could idiot me like an animal.

“It’s better…” he panted, our bodies glistening with sweat, slapping together.

“Yes.” I knew what he meant even though neither of us could form a complete sentence. We’d both wanted it so long, fantasized about it to such lengths, but the reality was so much better.

I looked up into his eyes. I couldn’t believe it was him, after all that time, and I could give myself to him completely. He gazed down at me with such love, such intense, fierce possession, it took my breath away.

“It made me insane when you were with him,” he hissed, thrusting in me deeply. “I’m never letting you go.”

I cried out, twisting my head to the side, eyes closed as I could feel my orgasm building. Every time he thrust he hit my clit, pounding it. I spread my legs, taking everything he gave me.

“You’re mine,” he growled, his voice fierce and low. I tore at the sheets, wild, screaming his name as my mind shattered, my body erupting as I came. Over and over, he pushed into me, sending me higher, then higher again. With a feral groan, the muscles in his neck and arms so thick and tense, Jax came too, pulsing inside so deep.

Panting, dazed, at some point I became aware that I was lying half at his side, half on top of him. My cheek to his chest, we panted, sweaty. I felt limp, nearly disembodied, like I was floating above myself. Listening to his heartbeat slowing into a steady rhythm, I gradually grew more grounded.

“You’re amazing.” He held me to him, sounding as dazed as I felt. My whole body was so warm and fluid, as if I’d melted with him.

“I love you.” I smiled into his chest, kissing him there.

“I love you, too, Sky.” I’d never known such sublime happiness.

16

Jax

I couldn’t believe I was alone in a hotel room making love to Sky. Her, the way I’d fantasized about and jerked off to more times than I could count. She was amazing. Crazy amazing. She needed a new word. Cramazing.

I wasn’t making any sense. I’d cum so hard inside her I wondered if I ever would again. Nothing had ever felt as good as Sky wrapped around me, moaning, taking me in, wanting everything I gave her. I’d worried I’d be too much for her, have to stop or hold back the whole time so I wouldn’t hurt her. She was so much smaller than me, I’d honestly figured the logistics could pose a problem. But where there was a will, there was a way. She’d been so wet that I’d slid right in, so eager she’d clawed at my rear, rolling her hips to take in all of me.

I’d wanted to make it last, give her a romantic first time together. Maybe burn a few candles, show her what a patient, giving lover I could be. I could go all night and, with Sky, I wanted to blow her mind again and again.

Then she’d wrapped her legs around me, cried out my name and told me she wanted me to harass her. I didn’t remember too much after that. I’d pounded into her, sweaty, demanding, a beast on the edge of reason, beyond control, needing to possess and mark her as mine with my seed.

“I thought maybe you didn’t want this,” Sky murmured, lying naked in my arms, her head against my chest.

“What?” The idea was so crazy. I couldn’t imagine she’d ever thought that way. “What about the way I could never keep my eyes off you? Or how I couldn’t stop touching you even though you were married?”

“You didn’t kiss me when I came to you.” Her voice sounded small.

“What, the night you were attacked by your husband?” She nodded against my chest. “Was that the right time to make my move?” I knew I sounded incredulous.

“No,” she agreed. “I know. It’s just… when I saw you with Nikki. You looked so perfect together. She was so pretty and happy. And you looked so happy, too.”

“I did?” Bored, maybe. Distracted. Or pleasantly comfortable. Those were a lot of the memories I had of being with Nikki.

“I’m not exactly like her,” she continued, “all carefree and easy.”

“Hey.” I managed to prop myself up on an elbow. I wanted to look her in the eye. “You know who I thought about when I was with Nikki? You. I tried to move on, but I couldn’t. I thought about you all the time.”

She smiled, resting her chin against my chest. “I can’t believe you remember that day I met you when I first moved here. That was like four years ago.”

“Course I remember that. You looked so sweet and pretty. I hated seeing you with Griller. You never belonged with him.”

She shook her head. “I was young and stupid. I wasted way too much time with him.”

“Not any more. You’re with me now.” I stroked her hair, loving the silky feel between my fingers. Every inch of her was a playground, her skin, her breasts, her lips. I wanted to devour her whole all over again. But after the pounding I’d just given her, she had to need a break. I had not exactly gone easy or slow.

She wriggled against me, pressing her breasts to my chest, running her palm along my stomach. If she didn’t want to get the party started again, she was going to have to stop doing that. When she dropped her hand to my cock, cradling its length, stroking it as it grew hard again, I had to say, “You can’t be ready to go again.”

She smiled up at me, impish, determined. “Let me decide if I’m ready or not. She rose and dang if she didn’t straddle me, her hips grinding against mine. “Let me show you how ready I am.”

She took my shaft and brought it to her dripping entrance. Holding onto the headboard, she steadied herself. I watched her face as she sank down on my cock. Her mouth opened at the size of me. She felt so good, almost impossibly tight around me, her hips stretching open. I probably should have let her go slow, lead, but it felt too good. I loved making that mouth of hers pop open way too much.

She might be on top, but I drove into her. Hands on her hips, I pushed up into her with my toe. She groaned, her head tilting back, her naked breasts displayed for me as she arched back in pleasure.

I growled with satisfaction, watching her hips roll and undulate as she took me in, riding me in rhythm. “That’s it,” I encouraged her, watching her work to take me all in, sliding along my length. Working her back down again, I slammed up inside of her.

She cried out, hand up to her hair, straddling me and rocking like she was riding a bucking bronco. It was as erotic, but I needed more. Moving swiftly, I flipped her, keeping her knees bent, rear up, but guiding her shoulders and head down into the pillows. Pushing her thighs apart with mine, I brought my cock to her entrance. At that angle, I pushed into her without warning in one, long thrust. She screamed, digging her fingers into the pillows, but she pushed back as she did it, wanting every inch. She wasn’t trying to squirm away. She was trying to arch back into me, offering herself up to mess and idiot hard.

Grabbing onto her hips, I started working her, pounding into her, watching the way she took me in with every thrust. Her rear jiggled with the force, her moans growing louder, mewling, crying out for more. I reached around, finding her clit and stroking it in rhythm, filling her deep as I worked her most sensitive spot. She broke apart, squeezing along my cock as she came, spasming and gasping. But I didn’t stop. Pounding into her, relentless, I kept at it.

“More,” I growled, pumping into her, watching her quiver and strain to stay up on her knees. The orgasm must have been powerful. She probably thought she was going to get a rest afterwards. Not yet. I’d waited too long, had way too much time to cook up nasty fantasies about her. One of my favorites was forcing her to cum, again and again, making her beg and plead and shake and sweat.

Slowing down, deliberate with my movements, I teased her, giving her the entire length of my cock, then inching it out. She panted, trying to slide down on me, trying to get me to pick up the pace. I loved how eager she was. But I wasn’t going to let her have it. Not yet. I wanted to watch it build in her, see her shiver and shake before she exploded again.

“You’re going to come again for me,” I told her, so slow in, so slow out. “You’re going to come hard.”

“Yes, Jax.” She moaned, “Please.” She clutched at the sheets.

I spread her rear cheeks apart, feasting on the sight of her pussy as I shoved my thick cock in deep, then withdrew. So slippery, I slid in and out in a maddeningly slow rhythm. She whimpered, trying to push back on me, trying to make it happen faster. Rear up in the air, back curved, she was the prettiest thing I’d ever seen. I rubbed her lower back, pressing her down as I caressed her. “That’s it. Give yourself to me. All of you.”

She moaned, surrendering completely. Firmly, commandingly, I grabbed her hips. Positioning myself up closer, right behind her, I raised her higher for a more intense angle.

“Now, I’ll forget you the way you deserve. The way you need.” I thrust all the way into her with one long, strong push. She trembled and cried out as I ground into her, faster, deeper, losing myself to the rhythm, pistoning in and out.

She looked so perfect there before me, so rosy and curvy, all feminine softness, yielding and wet. I was going to cum soon. And I realized I didn’t have a condom. Balls tightening, pulse pounding, at the last minute I withdrew and shot my hot cum all over her rear.

She screamed, shaking as she came, my cum spurting all over her pink cheeks, dripping down her thighs, coating her creamy skin. I shot out, then shot some more, rubbing her rear with my cock, watching it glisten over her rounded curves. I ran my hand over her cheeks, claiming her, rubbing in my cum, stroking her as she shuddered and rode out one last crest of her orgasm.

“So good, baby,” I murmured, amazed by her. I’d never had sex so intense, felt so turned on by a woman’s every sound, every move. She sighed in response, so content, so spent as she collapsed onto the bed, hips down, legs splayed. I’d worked my woman hard. Gathering her against me, I kissed her hair, her cheek.

Had I been too rough with her? She’d been with a violent, abusive man. I probably should have talked with her first, had a logical, rational, adult conversation about boundaries and language. I hadn’t meant to get so rough with her. But instinct had taken over and with Sky, that was how we fit together.

“How you doing?” I caressed her arms, her neck, wanting her to feel cherished and loved.

“So good.” She sounded drowsy, exhausted.

But I had to ask, “Too rough?”

She smiled, looking up at me so enraptured. “You’re exactly how I always dreamed you’d be. Late at night.” She traced a finger over my chest, gazing up shyly. “When I’d touch myself. Only what you just did was even better.”

She sank back down, snuggled into me. My heart raced, my cock already starting to stir again at her words. “You might be the death of me,” I told her.

“We’ll both die happy,” she murmured, sounding pretty dang deliriously happy herself.

§

“What do you think they’ll do to him?” Sky sat next to me in the back seat of the SUV, a plain black baseball cap pulled down low over her head. We were parked in downtown Cavallo, half a block from Griller’s girlfriend’s apartment. So far, we hadn’t seen either one of them.

“Do you really want to know?” Did she really not know? She’d been a part of the MC world the last several years. Sure, she and Griller had grown increasingly distant, and she’d told me she’d never spent much time with the crew. But she must know.

“Yes,” she said, certain.

“They’ll kill him.” No question about it.

She nodded, not seeming surprised by the news. Perhaps she had already known. “They will.” She bit her fingernail, never stopping her vigilant search out the front window. “I know it’s not right. But he’ll never stop hunting me down. Never let me live in peace.”

“Never,” I agreed. I wanted to rush in, reassure her. Tell her everything was fine. But there was that pragmatic streak in me, holding me back. She needed to work it out herself. I might be able to put a Band-Aid on the wound, make her forget about it for the short term. But life was a long time to live. If you felt guilty about something, it would eat away at you no matter how many people tried to make you feel better.

I should know. After the boat accident, everyone involved had told me I wasn’t to blame for Ian’s injuries. Ian himself had asked for me, one of the first persons he wanted to see after he came to in the burn ward. I’d slunk into his room, so embarrassed all I had was a broken arm and a few bruises. Seventy percent of his body had been burned.

But he’d looked up at me from his hospital bed, a mess of bandages and charred skin, and he’d thanked me. “You did all you could,” he’d said as I’d stood there silent, one of the few times in my life I’d shaken with tears. “I saw you trying to get to me. I know you did everything you could.”

His words had stayed with me, but the guilt had proven even stronger, something about that night seeming to validate a fear I’d always had about myself, deep down. All my life, looking like a thug with a disinterested mother and a father in and out of jail, I’d always felt like a bad guy. I’d struggled to straighten out, do the right thing. But no matter how hard I tried, that doubt dogged me. Maybe it didn’t matter how hard I tried. Maybe it was baked in. I was no good.

So, I let Sky work it out herself. She needed to come to her own conclusions about the step she was about to take. If she went through with it and led Griller to the Reapers, she wouldn’t be the one pulling the trigger, but she wouldn’t be far from it. She had to look that head on, and make sure she could live with it the rest of her life.

“There’ll be no tracing it back to us, right?” she asked. “That’s the deal. We give them Griller. They give us freedom.”

“That’s right. Freedom.”

“We can walk away.” She smiled at me, but it wasn’t like the smiles she was giving me last night, or in the early hours of the morning in our hotel room. This one was determined, but small and tight. “It’s pretty Old Testament, though.” She looked out the window again.

“An eye for an eye,” I agreed.

“I’m not sure it’s the right thing to do.” It was difficult, watching her work her way through it. But I was a patient man. “He doesn’t do things the right way, though,” she added. “He’s been torturing and murdering people for years. Who knows how many people he’s hurt, husbands and fathers. He’s a bad man.” She shook her head. “He hurt me. He’ll hurt you. He’ll never let me divorce him. He’ll never let me rest.”

“Never,” I agreed. “But this is a big call, Sky. You have to make sure you really want to go through with it.”

She nodded, looking out with more weariness than I ever wanted to see on her lovely face again. But I guessed that was part of what made us connect so intensely, too. Neither of us had had an unmarked life. We’d both been through some rough trash, seen things that left us scarred. But that was part of what made her beautiful to me, how resilient she was, how I still saw her sing and smile and chat with everyone at the home even while she knew such darkness and pain. The woman baked pies, for goodness sake. She insisted on being happy, despite knowing the exact opposite. And man did she deserve to be happy. I hoped she’d give me a shot at making her feel that way the rest of her days.

“Let’s do it,” she declared. As if on cue, Griller’s girlfriend rounded the corner. But she walked alone. It wouldn’t be time to act even if Griller were with her. We needed to plan things out, get a sense of how they moved so we could decide on ours. But it put the wheels in motion.

Silent, we both watched her turn and climb some front stairs. Key in the lock, she entered. That was definitely where she lived. And where we’d see Griller, sooner or later. The location was set.

We spent a couple more hours waiting, watching, but after she emerged alone, clearly done up for the night, we knew we wouldn’t see much more for a while. We stopped at a drive-thru, picking up something quick and easy where no one could spot us. Again, I wished I could treat Sky better. I wasn’t exactly a rich man, but the bar had made me decent money. Now that I’d cashed out, I had a nice bank account I would happily dip into to spoil Sky, lavish her with romantic dinners, take her shopping or whatever else she wanted. But for now, I’d have to settle for hamburgers and the bags of stuff my guy had managed to steal away from Sky’s apartment.

“How did he get these?” Sky asked me back at the hotel room.

“Better not to know.” I didn’t even know the guy’s tactics. He was a slippery fish. I’d paid him a bundle, but the reason I knew I could trust him to keep quiet was that he owed me from a night a couple years back. He’d stolen the wallet right out of the back pocket of a Skull. And not just any Skull, the club president, a fact he had not known. I’d caught him as he’d walked out, but instead of making a scene, knowing it would likely cost him his life or at least his balls, I’d let him put it back, sight unseen. He’d swung by from time to time since then, insisting on paying me back, telling me he wanted to do me a solid. Well, now we were even.

“My clothes!” She spun around, holding pieces up in delight. “I’m going to show you something!” Flashing me a mischievous glance, she darted off to the bathroom. When she came out in a matching lacy bra and panties set, I knew she wouldn’t have them on for long.

“I bought these for you,” she told me shyly, standing at the doorway. “I know it doesn’t make any sense. It was last summer. I knew I couldn’t be with you, but still…” She shrugged. “I wanted to feel sexy when I saw you.”

She looked sexy, all curves, her luscious breasts rounding out of the lacy top. I scowled, hating the thought Griller might have seen her like that.

“Mike never saw me in this,” she added quickly, clearly sensing the shift in my thoughts.

“I hated you being with him.” My fists balled at my sides, remembering how much.

“I hated it, too. It didn’t happen often. Between us.” She looked down seeming to dislike the topic. “He couldn’t…perform.”

“Really?” That made me feel better. A little.

“At first it made me feel like something was wrong with me. Then, I was just relieved. All I’ve wanted for so long now is you.”

“Come here.” I beckoned her over to the bed, took her in my arms, the most beautiful woman I’d ever known. Kissing her, caressing her, she moved like liquid gold in my arms, so honey sweet and precious. “You’re so beautiful, Sky. So sexy.”

Words were one thing. But I was a man of action. I laid her onto the bed, kissing my way down her body, drinking in every inch. Down to her thighs, I whispered kisses along her inner thighs, blowing on her sensitive skin, breathing in her scent. She whimpered, digging her heels into the mattress, her hips undulating with need.

Her panties were pretty, delicate and feminine like her, but they had to go. Slowly, I slid them down her hips, watching her breathing pick up as she panted in anticipation. Back between her legs, I slid my hands under her rear, positioning her before me.

“So wet, baby. So gorgeous.” Her pussy glistened, slick and ready for me. I blew on it, enjoying how it made her arch her back, her nipples standing out in stiff points. “Spread your legs for me.”

She opened herself wider for me, giving me full access. As I stroked the pad of my thumb against her swollen clit, her mouth opened in a gasp. Hips rocking, fingers clutching the sheets, everything about her sang with desire. But then I stopped looking and feasted instead, licking, lapping her up, thrusting my tongue in her the way I’d harass her with my cock later that night.

“Jax!” She panted and screamed. “Jax, yes!” She came in my mouth and I drank her down, flicking my tongue against her clit to make it last. Next time I’d make her wait, tease her longer, enjoy a more drawn-out meal. That first time I’d been too hungry for her taste. I’d been starving for her for too long.

Up by her side, I held her against me. “You are so delicious.”

“You’re incredible.” She sounded winded, a little disoriented. It made me proud. “I’m so happy with you Jax. I want you to know, if this doesn’t all work out—”

“It’s going to work out,” I reassured her. I didn’t want her thinking about the alternative.

She propped herself up on her elbows and looked me in the eye. Leaning against a pillow, I gazed at her, aware of her breasts against my chest, the feel of her rear beneath my palm as I caressed her. “I’m so grateful I met you.”

“I feel the same way.”

“I spied on you in the shower, you know.” She tucked her head down at my throat, giggling.

“What?” That was not a comment to let pass.

“The night you came home late, at Zeke’s. The bathroom door was open a crack. And I spied on you.”

“You naughty thing.” She started laughing, spinning away from me but I caught her and pressed her to me. Playful, I gave her rear a smack. “You really watched me in the shower?”

“Yes.”

“Naughty.” I brought my hand down again, firm on her rear and this time it became something more. She moaned, her eyes closing as she bit her lower lip. My cock pressed into her hips as she ground against me, then arched her back, raising her rear to me again ever so slightly. Offering it to me.

Did she like getting spanked? My toe could not have sprung up harder. I reached my palm to her buttocks again, giving them a sweet caress, gentle, tender. Then I raised it and brought it down again in a sharp spank. This time, there was no mistaking the depth of her moan, the need in her that my rough palm stoked. She liked it.

Spank, my hand came down again on her soft rear cheek, making a resounding smack. She cried out, panting. I dipped my hand down further to her pussy, swept my fingers along and found her slick with arousal.

“Sky.” I groaned at the discovery, thrusting my finger up, then drawing it to my mouth, tasting her sweetness. I shifted our bodies, sitting up against the headboard and drawing her across my lap. Now her rear was presented for me, naked and pink. I caressed it, slowly, stroking while she whimpered and writhed beneath me.

“You know how many times I fantasized about your rear?” Smack, my hand came down again on her buttocks, drawing another deep moan from her. I massaged her cheeks. I’d never want to really hurt her. Just give her enough kink, enough of a sting to make her dripping wet.

Loving my view, I stroked her lower back, her hips. “You have the best rear I’ve ever seen, so round and pink.” She’d moved a bit, so I grasped her by the hips and positioned her again right over my lap. I brought my fingers to her pussy. “I like how wet you get for me.”

“You always get me so wet,” she murmured.

I kept up a slow rhythm, thrusting into her, then out, now with two fingers. “Back when I’d see you at the home, did I make you wet then?”

“Yes,” she confessed with a moan.

“Oh, Sky.” I spanked her again, keeping my other fingers in her while I did it, eliciting a low moan and quiver. “Did you touch yourself and think about me?”

“All the time,” she sobbed. Spank, my big, rough palm came down again hard on her rear. Her hands clenched the sheets as she gasped. “Oh, Jax! I’m so close!” I could feel she was, so soaking wet, her clit swollen. I soothed her, spreading my fingers over her warm buttocks, caressing, teasing. Her pussy looked so good, so pink and glistening for me. I knew what she needed.

I shifted her, moving her legs to either side of my hips as she still lay face-down between my legs. Sliding my hands under her stomach, I lifted her up and bent down to devour her with my mouth. Licking and sucking, I nipped at her clit. She bucked into my face, pushing against my thighs with her hands, screaming with pleasure. When I reached around and stroked her breasts, then found her erect nipples and gave them a pinch, twisting them between my thumb and finger, she came apart.

Cumming in my mouth, she cried out, nearly incoherent, swearing, begging, calling my name. I licked and lapped, delirious on the taste of her sweet cream, milking out her orgasm into shudder after shudder until she lay, completely spent against my legs.

I petted her, stroking her pink rear, her back. “You taste so good.”

“Oh my goodness, Jax.” She sighed, so content. I wanted to keep her like that always. But I had more I wanted to do to her first. Flipping her over, I brought a pillow under her rear, then licked her pussy again. I couldn’t get enough. I’d thought the pies she baked were addictive. But I’d never quit craving her pussy as long as I lived.

“Jax,” she blushed, her hand up to her forehead, looking up at me between her legs once again.

“I want more,” I explained, unapologetic. “I had to look but not touch for a long time. But not anymore.” I went down again, taking my time, little licks and sucks making her shiver and sigh. I was going to drown in her orgasms, taking her along with me for the ride. This time, though, I withdrew my tongue before she could get there.

“No!” she whimpered in protest, her breath coming in pants, sweat glistening over her body.

“I want you to come on my cock.” I grinned at her, tearing away the pillow and positioning my crown at her entrance.

“Yes,” she groaned, sitting up, spreading open, readying herself for me. Nothing felt as good as easing into her, pushing into that slick honey, burying myself in her so deep I groaned from my soul.

“Idiot me, Jax.” She rolled her hips, taking me in, as desperate for it as I was. It spurred me on, seeing her so frantic, so urgent. I slipped on a condom and I pounded into her, fierce, relentless, turning her to lie on her back so I could drive her into the bed.

She screamed, tilting her head, clawing at me. Her breasts shook from my pounding. I bent down and sucked on her berry pink tips, grasping her mounds so full and soft as I bit down on her nipples. Someday I’d cum all over them, make her spread it all over her breasts, coating herself, licking it off her fingers. She twisted underneath me, wild, lost. As I thrust in deep, starting to cum, she came apart. I made her mine, cumming so hard I thought I’d black out, hearing her scream out my name.

We lay there, panting, sheets soaked with sweat, her hair a messy tangle. But I wasn’t sorry I’d gone so hard on her. Not when the passion burned between us so bright. Not when the danger we faced was so great. Because while I did my best to reassure her, I knew the risk we were taking. Everything had to go exactly right as we lured Griller into our trap. Or we might not come out of it alive.

17

Sky

Jax and I sat in the SUV, staking out the apartment. I didn’t even know Mike’s girlfriend’s name. I wondered if Jax did. But, really, I didn’t want to know.

“What if they’re not together anymore?” I voiced my fear. “Or what if she sleeps at the apartment with him. You know, now that I’m gone.”

“We can’t worry about that now, Sky. Let’s go with the plan we have. If we need a Plan B, we’ll come up with one.”

I nodded, knowing he was right. But I hated this waiting game. I felt like the longer it went on, the more the chances grew that our cover would get blown. Someone would notice the SUV, parked one too many times in the same dang spot. Or Jax or I would get spotted around town. This thing had to happen fast if it was going to go right.

We needed as few people involved as possible. No Skulls sensing anything was amiss, no Reapers starting to sniff around. But so far, we hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Mike.

Finally, around four p.m., his girlfriend came out, dressed in idiot-me boots and a mini dress. Nice. Seemed like a classy lady. The lucky guy wasn’t around, though. I swore, pounding my fist into the seat of the car.

“C’mon. Let’s do a test drive.” Jax tried to distract me. I climbed into the driver’s seat. I’d have to do the driving if we ever actually saw Mike and finally got to attempt this crazy stunt. Jax would have to stay hidden, leading Mike to believe I was all alone, vulnerable. Exactly how he wanted me.

Killing time, we did a test drive of the delivery. That’s what the Reapers were calling it anyway, and it sounded tidier that way. Like Jax and I were delivering a package, UPS pulling up in a brown truck, instead of luring Mike into a trap. A few streets down, I turned onto the freeway. The warehouse was 12.6 miles away, seven exits. I’d memorized it, looked at it on a map, now all that was left was actually driving the route.

Off the exit, after a Dairy Queen, a 7-11 and a gas station, I saw an untended lot. Nothing but gravel and weeds, I pulled into the driveway, feeling like I was up to no good. Which I was. Following it down, we arrived at a boarded up building, wood panels over the few windows, the metal roof dented and rusted through in a few places.

“Let’s go take a look,” Jax suggested. I parked around in back. He led me over to a side door his Reaper contact said would remain open. Jax tested it, and the metal handle moved down in his hands, opening right up. Inside, it was shadowy and cavernous.

“So, when it goes down, you pull right up next to the door. Not so close you can’t get out and open it, but block yourself in with the car. Remember, it’s bullet proof.”

“Yup, right at the door.” We’d gone over it before, how I’d come around in back, assuming Mike would be right behind me. I’d have only seconds to park and dash into the warehouse before he’d draw his gun and shoot.

“They’ll be inside, waiting. But we have to make it over there, then out that door.” He pointed to a bunch of barrels, metal drums. We were going to head alongside them, then escape out through the door in back, heading out again to the SUV.

We tried it out, walking along the route, ducking behind the barrels, out again in a few short steps though the separate door. It all seemed so easy in the light of day, all the time in the world, no one at our heels. How would it go with gunshots ringing out all around me, some directed straight at my back? I wasn’t so sure.

We got some food, used the bathroom, and went back to waiting. Waiting. Until finally, just when I thought I was going cross-eyed, when I was ready to call it quits and tell Jax we needed Plan B, we saw them.

Griller and his girl. She clung to his arm like she loved him. My eyes narrowed. I wondered if he hurt her the way he’d hurt me. I bet he did. Or if he wasn’t there yet, he’d already started with the little things. A shove here, a broken plate there. A man like that only knew violence. Things were sure to escalate.

Maybe they would tonight. But they wouldn’t for long. Because now we knew where to find Mike. All that remained was to set out the bait.

Back at the hotel, Jax made a call. It was time for some Reapers to come on up. They had to stay local, be on standby so they could beat us to the warehouse. The next time we’d see Mike, we’d go for it.

Seeing Griller had frightened me. He was so ruthless. What if he got to me first? He’d kill me quick, no questions asked. What if he didn’t follow me, but waited and watched, finding the right time to get me? Or what if he did call for back up, arriving at the warehouse with an army? Both Jax and I could get shot and killed.

Off the phone, Jax turned to me, kissing me fiercely. He sensed my tension, maybe felt it himself. “I need you naked.” He took off my shirt, slipped down my skirt. I stripped him, too, hungry to feel him against me, craving his touch on what might be our last night together. Off went the bra and panties, down went his briefs. I palmed his cock, so hard for me.

“Can you…” I hesitated, then decided to say it. “Don’t use a condom, Jax. I want you bare.”

“You’re sure?” he whispered.

“I want to feel you cum inside me.”

“I want that, too. I’m clean.”

“I am too.” I guessed I had Mike’s erectile dysfunction to thank for that.

He backed me up, kissing me, and I felt the sofa against the back of my legs. “Turn around and kneel on it.” His voice, low and commanding, drugged me. It wasn’t anything like Mike, the way he used to try to belittle me and make me feel useless. When Jax took control, I trusted him completely.

I knelt, shaking with anticipation. He brought his warm, rough hand to the center of my back and guided me forward. “Hold on.” I loved that I needed to grab hold of something with him, that he was so big and powerful I literally had to anchor myself to take his pounding. I felt my pussy ache in response, a throb of arousal.

I brought my hands to the back of the sofa. He stroked me, his hands roaming my limbs as he watched me there, positioned as he’d told me, completely naked.

Coming to stand behind me, I felt the warmth of his body, his hips at the level of mine. He slid his hand along my side, down my hip, grabbing me there, holding me firm. As he dipped his lips down my throat, I tilted my head back, giving him access. I shivered in response as he licked, then bit my neck.

“Are you ready?” he growled.

“Yes,” I moaned. I was ready for whatever he wanted to give me. Hand at my hip, he brought his cock to my entrance. With a swift, strong thrust, he pushed inside. I gasped, holding on as he’d told me to, needing the support he stretched me so wide. Determined, fierce, he began to mess me, picking up the pace, slamming into me. I grunted with effort, taking him in, feeling used in exactly the right way.

“This was what I wanted to do to you that day. In the supply room.”

“Idiot yes,” I groaned, closing my eyes, imagining if he’d bent me over the counter and pounded into me. I’d been wet enough he could have slid right in.

Wild, animalistic, he slammed into me. The slap of his balls, the sounds of his grunts, he held onto my waist, pressed against my shoulders for leverage.

“Do you know how many times I’ve jacked off thinking about you?” He messed me, almost sounding like he was taking it out on me, all the frustration, all the lonely nights. I cried out, wanting him to do exactly that. “All the fantasies, I couldn’t stop you from getting in my head. With my cock in my hand, all I could think about was you.”

“Come in me, Jax,” I begged, desperate to feel it. We’d been forced apart for so long, I needed it, that bond between us. I couldn’t stand the pain in his voice, the longing he remembered.

He thrust and poured himself in me, spurting so deep inside, hot and thick. I wanted every last drop and I pushed against him, never wanting him to withdraw, wanting to stay bound to him forever. I exploded, arching my back and screaming out with wild shudders.

He drew me into his arms and carried me to the shower. Under the warm stream of water, we caressed each other, taking turns with a soapy washcloth. He was so beautiful, if that word could be used for a huge, tattooed man. But I felt fascinated with him as I drew the cloth across his muscles, the lines of ink.

He massaged me, washing me tenderly. “I feel like I should be more gentle with you,” he apologized. “But I can’t. I can’t stop myself.”

“I don’t want you to be.” I looked up at him, kissing him in the steam, under the stream of warm water.

“I need to possess you, claim you.” Our kisses grew more heated, him pressing me against the wall. My desire for him knew no bounds. All that time longing, plus it might all end tomorrow. It made me reckless. We didn’t have time to waste.

“I’m yours, Jax. I belong to you.”

He dropped the cloth, now using his fingers, massaging me, caressing me, soapy around my breasts, down at my pussy. Then reaching around to my rear. I tensed as he reached a finger to my jerk, circling it. No one had ever touched me there.

“All of you, Sky.” He looked into my eyes, taking my hands up, locking my wrists under his palm. The water streamed down around us, creating our own world. I stood there, pressed against the wall, him holding me where he wanted me.

I want all of you,” he repeated, pushing his finger inside my rear. I gasped, writhing under his grip, feeling so possessed, so hot at the same time. It was forbidden, he wasn’t supposed to touch me there. I’d never thought I’d like that. But with Jax, he knew what I’d like even if I didn’t.

“That’s it,” he coaxed me, reading the start of my reaction on my face. He massaged me, thrusting into my rear, slowly, leisurely. “Let it feel good.”

Shivering, I closed my eyes, sighing, relaxing. And it started to feel good, the rhythm he started, pushing into me. So wrong and so right at the same time. The way he had my wrists trapped over my head, it released me. I didn’t have to worry about whether I should or shouldn’t like it. I could just let go.

“I love your rear, Sky.” He pushed into it, further up, working in a second finger.

Using the soap, the water, he slid in, opening me up. My legs quivered, my breath coming in quick pants. Still holding my wrists firmly overhead, he dipped his mouth down to my breasts, sucking, licking, toying with my nipples.

Up my throat, he made his way to my ear. As he worked his two fingers up into my rear, I could feel the tremor of an orgasm start. With a low, dirty whisper, he told me, “I’m going to forget you here, Sky. I need to possess all of you.”

I gasped, mouth open, wriggling against his grasp, imagining what he told me he’d do. His cock was so big. I looked down at it, the crown purple and swollen, bobbing against my hip. He wanted that up my rear?

“It’s going to stretch you, Sky. Fill you up. But you’re going to want it.” As he talked, he messed me with his fingers, shoving them in, faster, harder. And I wanted him to, I wanted what he talked about.

“Yes,” I panted, moving against him, pushing my buttocks back into his hand.

He thrust in deep and I came, pressing back into him, ripples of pleasure shaking me to my core. I’d never known, never understood how that could be erotic. But now he’d showed me, how the forbidden could be such delicious fruit.

We rinsed off and climbed into bed. Spent as we both were, neither of us were ready to fall asleep. The sun would rise in a few hours, and who knew what would happen? I prayed everything would work out. But it wasn’t as if I had a lot of experience with this sort of thing. I’d been married to a criminal, not engaged in any of it myself. I shivered in his arms.

“What’s wrong?” he murmured, wrapping his arms around me. We lay together naked, warm beneath the sheets.

“I’m frightened.”

He drew me up, kissing me. “Trust me, Sky.” He ran his hands down my back, along my arms. I wound myself around him, wanting to feel his heat. “I’ll keep you safe. I promise.”

“I need you, Jax,” I murmured, shameless in the dark. Maybe I should have been more reserved, but I couldn’t afford to hold back. We might not have another night together.

“I need you too, Sky.” He leaned down, pressing me to him and I could feel his erection. The man was a miracle. He reached down a finger and found my pussy, stroking it, slick for him. But that wasn’t where I wanted to take his cock.

“I need you to mess me,” I whispered. “Idiot me how you told me you would in the shower.”

He stilled against me, his grip on my rear tightening. “You sure?”

“Yes,” I pleaded, my body already tingling with anticipation.

He teased me, grazing his palm lightly over my rear. As he used his fingers to stroke and touch, a tremor of pleasure welled up inside me. I bucked against him, wanting more. I reached down and wrapped my fingers around his shaft, stroking him as I asked, “Please?”

That did it. He flipped me over, tucking a pillow underneath my hips. Using my own arousal, he took his fingers and slid them over my jerk, massaging it, lubing it up.

“It’s going to hurt, Sky,” he warned me as I lay there, panting, waiting. “But then it’s going to feel good.” I felt tense but excited, putting myself completely in his hands. He worked in a finger, then two, massaging my tight hole.

I wriggled, spreading my thighs, taking him in deep. “Please, Jax. Please.”

With a groan, he removed his fingers, but I didn’t miss contact with him for long. I felt the velvet tip of his cock, slippery with his precum, starting to push. I clenched, involuntarily, on instinct.

“Relax, Sky,” he reminded me, hand up to my neck, rubbing me there. He kept his hand on me, his strong touch making me sigh and release. He pushed again, and this time his mushroom-thick crown shoved past my tight ring.

“Ah!” I cried out, stiff, eyes and mouth wide open with shock. It did hurt.

Hand around to stroke my clit, he started to thrust into my rear. I closed my eyes, narrowing my focus. His firm hand on the back of my neck, the sound of his breathing. He had me. I trusted him, completely.

Exhaling, I relaxed once again, letting him press into me. It tingled, it burned, but it also started to throb, building pressure in my clit as he moved in rhythm with his fingers. In and out, bit by bit, pushing his huge mess up my tight jerk.

“Jax,” I moaned, taking more of him in, starting to want it. It turned me on to give him so much. I started shaking, parting my thighs more.

“That’s it.” He pushed down on my neck, starting to ride me, pushing his hips into my buttocks, working his shaft deep inside. “Yes.” His groan came from deep inside, a place of male, primal satisfaction, owning me, filling me, possessing me in my most secret, intimate of all places.

“You’re mine,” he growled, working me faster, harder. “Mine.”

“Yes,” I moaned, thrusting against his fingers, still on my clit. Fevered, desperate, I’d never felt that way before, the pressure so intense, the edge between pleasure and pain so sharp, so close.

With him in to the hilt, I screamed, quaking under his onslaught, right at the brink. “Please,” I begged, not even aware where I was anymore, a quivering mess, every nerve bundled tight together, pleading for release.

He fisted my hair, pulling it as he thrust hard and deep. “Cum for me.”

“Yes!” I screamed out. With a mighty groan, he ground into me, jetting his hot cum into my tight jerk. Crying out, I pushed into his fingers, throbbing, cumming along with him, mewling and creaming and incoherent.

“Sky.” He fell down on top of me, bearing the brunt of his weight on his hands, but pressing against me with his broad, strong chest. “So good,” he panted.

“Oh, Jax.” I was crying now, real tears of release. It had felt so intimate, so intense.

“Come here.” He withdrew and pulled me to him, my breasts crushed against his chest. “Shh.” He stroked my hair, calmed me as I shook. “Are you all right? Was that too much?”

“I love you so much, Jax.” I sobbed, feeling it overwhelm me, shake me to my core. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Sky.” Against his chest, breathing him in, I calmed down, my breathing still ragged.

“I’m OK,” I tried to reassure him. “I didn’t mean to lose it like that.”

“You can lose it like that any time you need to.” He kissed my forehead, nuzzled my cheek. “I’m an intense man, Sky. And I’m not holding back anything with you. But if you need me to back off—”

“No.” I clutched at him, pressing my lips up to his. “No, I need you. I need this. I’m just…” I shook my head, not wanting to say it out loud. “What if, later on, things go wrong? I might lose you.” My voice cracked and tears spilled from my eyes yet again.

“No, baby.” He kissed me again, rubbing my back, pulling the covers up over us. “No. Nothing but blue skies for my Sky. I’m going to take care of you, the rest of your life if you let me.” He held me, wrapping me in his powerful arms until I could feel the certainty in his hold. He meant it. I sighed, feeling exhaustion finally overtake my senses, a heavy curtain of sleep drawing over me.

§

The next day, mid-afternoon, Jax and I were lying in wait. He was sitting in the back of the SUV. I was waiting down the block, standing in front of a donut shop, hoping I looked inconspicuous as I sipped a cup of coffee. I’d already been standing there for half an hour. Were the people in the shop starting to wonder what was up? I didn’t want to change location, give away where I was too soon. What if Mike rounded the corner when I was unaware? I couldn’t let my guard down for even a second.

But as I stood, my anxiety spun and grew. Was it obvious, the same black SUV parked in the same spot yet again? Maybe it was clear that we were staking out her apartment? Maybe Mike had already seen us, was already on to our plan. He might have someone watching us that very second.

But then, the moment we’d been waiting for, Mike rounded the corner. I could barely breathe, but I forced myself to do it, to remember the plan. I took off my cap and shook out my hair to make sure he’d be able to recognize me when he saw me. I watched out of the corner of my eye until he’d passed the blue car. Close enough, but not so close he could catch me before I got to the SUV. At least I hoped.

Chin down, not looking his way, I strode out onto the sidewalk. Like I’d just bought myself a coffee. Now I was headed to my car. I had no idea my violent husband was mere feet away, about to go visit his girlfriend. Did he see me? I couldn’t look up to check. Was he running right at me? I couldn’t peek to see that, either. If he wasn’t, it would ruin the whole plan. If he was, I just had to pray to heaven Jax was quicker.

Hand shaking, I pressed the unlock button on my keychain and opened the car. Sliding into the front seat, I locked the doors and started the engine.

“He saw you,” Jax assured me from the back seat. I couldn’t breathe. I had to wait a few seconds, give him time to get to his bike. But that also left me vulnerable to sudden moves. What if he decided to draw his gun and appear at the driver’s side window instead, demanding I come out? Jax had assured me the SUV had bullet proof glass, but what if it didn’t?

“He’s gone to get his bike. It’s working.” Jax’s words sent a shiver down my spine. So far the plan was working. But it was far from over. “I’ve texted them. But wait another few seconds.” We sat there, both silent. The Reapers were on their way, speeding toward the warehouse. But we had to wait and see whether Mike was going to go in for the chase.

It felt like an eternity, but it couldn’t have been more than twenty seconds before we saw Mike pull to the corner on his bike.

“Now,” Jax said. With a quick look out my side mirror, I merged into the street. Hands shaking, I drove up to the intersection where he waited to my right. If the light was red, I was supposed to turn left. If it stayed green, I could push on through. I didn’t turn my head as I drew near, but I could see him out of the corner of my eye. He looked ready to murder, venom pumping through his veins.

The light stayed green and I drove on through. I could hear the roar of his engine pull out behind me. The chase was on.

“OK, you remember. Second right, then left to get onto the freeway.”

I’d headed from downtown Cavallo onto the freeway a couple hundred times over the past four years. But this time, my hands were shaking and sweaty. My brain felt like it was filled with white, hot static. I didn’t mind Jax giving me directions. I needed them.

In the rear view mirror, I could see Mike following me, close on my tail. Did he think I’d spotted him? He probably didn’t care. He was just going to wait until I stopped. He didn’t care where or when, he’d be there to strike.

I made it to the freeway. Traffic was moving, thank goodness. “You’re doing good, baby.” Jax reached a hand around to my leg, giving me a reassuring rub. “So good.”

I nodded, unable to manage more than that. I knew he hated that I had to play this role. He wanted to be the one on the line, the one taking the heat and driving the car. But I had to do it. If Mike thought I wasn’t alone, he might get suspicious. He might already be. If he called any other Skulls, the plan would fall apart. Or blow up, escalating into gang warfare.

No, I needed to do it. And, frightened as I was, it felt right. I’d gotten myself into this mess. Now I was getting myself out. True, I was leading him into other’s hands but in a way, he was dying by his own sword. He’d been a sick, twisted idiot, to me and to others. Now the jig was up.

Realizing he wasn’t trying to catch up, that he was trailing me, I breathed a little easier. A little. He clearly thought he was following me, as if he’d caught me unaware. Just like we wanted him to think. Part of me had worried he’d try to pull up alongside the SUV, waving his gun or even shooting out my tires. He was crazy enough to do it. But it looked like he was playing into our hands instead.

“Into the right lane. Exit after this,” Jax reminded me. I put on my blinker, merging into the right lane like I did this every day. Leading my husband who wanted to murder me to a bunch of people who wanted to murder him. I pulled off at the warehouse, heading down the driveway, the dilapidated building in my view. Mike was right behind me. It was going to be tight. I had to pull right up to the door and run in fast. We had no room for error.

“Right by the door, baby.” Jax’s voice guided and calmed me and I pulled in just like we’d planned. Just like we needed. Key out, door open, I jumped out, heart pounding. Jax got there before me, yanking open the door, grabbing my hand to pull me through.

I saw no one in the gloom, but I knew they must be there, the Reapers waiting for their delivery. We ran toward the barrels. I could see the door beyond them, the one we needed to escape through.

The door we’d entered through banged open with a loud clatter.

“Where you think you’re going, jerk?” Mike’s voice rang out even louder, rage and hate pumping through his lungs.

Gunshots rang out from everywhere. Behind me, next to me. I shoved my hands over my ears, the acrid smoke in my nose, disoriented as Jax pulled me forward.

18

Jax

Shots ringing out, I could tell Sky was completely disoriented. I was sure she’d never been in anything like this before. She’d experienced violence, having spent four years with Griller, but there was no way she been in anything like this.

I’d hoped we’d get out before Griller made it in. But the guy was fast. He’d gone for the bait, just like we figured he would. Seeing Sky proved irresistible, just like it had to me. Only I’d never wanted to kill her. Griller obviously had exactly that in mind. The murderous look in that idiot’s eyes? I’d seen a lot of crazy before, but he brought it to the next level.

The second the door opened behind us with a deafening bang, I sprang into hyper-speed. I’d already been running, staying behind Sky so I could protect her. If a bullet came our way, I wanted to take it. I was prepared to throw my body over hers, roll her to the ground and get her safely under cover. But then the door we’d come through opened, and I knew I had to take the lead.

“This way.” I grabbed her arm, pulling her toward the exit door at a faster pace, accelerating our speed. Shots fired all around us, Reapers emerging out from the shadows. I could see two overhead, one over in the corner. They’d staked the whole place out, had every angle covered.

But I was sure Griller was giving as good as he got. And if his reputation for violence was deserved, the man was capable of doing serious harm. Plus, he had motivation. Now he could not only see Sky, I was sure he could see me, holding her hand as we tried to get away.

With all the noise and smoke, I couldn’t tell if it was just him or if he’d brought back-up. I hadn’t seen anyone behind us on the freeway, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t had a moment of insight and called in some brothers. They might have been on their way, arriving fast on our heels to help him put an end to his cheating wife. But I couldn’t turn around to look. I had to get the two of us to safety.

It couldn’t have been more than ten seconds before my hand touched the handle of the exit door. But those ten seconds felt like ten hours. And all it took was an instant to get a fatal gunshot wound. Ripping the door open, I pulled Sky out first, thrusting her back out into the daylight before I followed, shutting it behind us.

“You hit?” I yelled, wrapping an arm around her lower back as I ran with her over to the SUV.

“I don’t think so.” She sounded terrified and close to losing it, but we were almost there. Eyes fixed on our target, I swept the area with my peripheral vision, looking for Skulls. I didn’t see anyone, but that didn’t mean we wouldn’t get a nasty surprise.

The SUV was still parked where we’d left it a minute ago. I fingered my set of keys in my pocket, opening all the doors.

“Passenger side,” I barked, urging her toward the right while I dove left toward the driver’s seat. She probably didn’t need the reminder of where to go, but it couldn’t hurt. Stress and adrenaline could make you fast—Sky was hustling just as swift as me, sprinting over the gravel and weeds to reach the car—but stress didn’t always support clear thinking. She might need a reminder, I was going to drive getaway to the next checkpoint.

In the car, I wrenched on the ignition and jammed us into drive, wheels scrabbling and screeching as we peeled out down the driveway and into the street. I wanted to put as much distance as I could between us and that warehouse. I wished I could erase it from Sky’s brain, too. But I had to go with the flow of traffic, stop at the red light. All it would take was a cop pulling us over for a minor violation to make this whole plan fall to pieces.

“You did so good, baby, so good. Are you OK?” I asked, panting, squeezing her hand. I didn’t see any blood, no evidence of an injury, but that was another thing about adrenaline. It could mask even a nasty wound in the heat of the moment.

She patted herself down, as if she were wondering the same thing. Legs, arms, torso. “I’m OK. Are you?”

I nodded, sure of it. Finally, the light changed and we merged onto the freeway where I could open it up. Again, I kept myself within five miles an hour of the speed limit, even though I craved as much distance as possible.

“It’s all right. It’s all going to be OK.” I kept holding Sky’s hand, enfolding her in my heat, offering her reassurance. But we’d both feel better once we got to the checkpoint. Twenty minutes later, I reached the exit. We didn’t say anything to each other as I drove, winding my way down and into town to an auto shop where Zeke knew a guy. But I knew we were both thinking the same thing. So close now, this was the last piece in the puzzle.

“You stay here.” I kissed her quick, leaving her in the passenger seat while I stepped out. Sure enough, right on cue, Zeke stepped out from the back of the shop.

“There you are.” He approached me looking calm and cool, but I didn’t take that as a guarantee that things had gone down the way we’d wanted at the warehouse. Zeke knew how to maintain a poker face in the middle of all kinds of crazy trash.

“What’s the story?” I stood next to him in the lot, nothing but cars in various states of repair all around us.

“All taken care of.”

“It’s done?” He nodded. Griller was dead. “And your guys?”

“They’re all good. Everyone got out. And you never were there.”

I took a moment, shaking my head at the news. Incredible. It had gone down as planned. I believed it, but I couldn’t believe it at the same time.

“That’s your ride.” Zeke pointed to a sweet silver Denali, the type you could tell came fully automated with its own WiFi hotspot. A truck that tricked out probably cost over 70K.

“You couldn’t get us something good?” Tense as the moment was, I couldn’t miss the opportunity to give him some trash.

“It’s all I could scrape together.” He walked me over, the truck starting all on its own as we approached. “Keyless technology.” He pressed a set of keys into my hand.

“If this whole MC thing doesn’t pan out for you, you could always get a job selling cars.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He smiled, but glanced over at the street. “You two better get going. You got any idea where you’re headed?”

“Yeah, I got an idea. But I got to talk with Sky about it first.” I looked out at the cars moving by, knowing we’d be one of them in a minute. But before that I wanted to let him know how much it meant to me, the way he’d come through for us. “Zeke, I want you to know—”

“I know, man.” He clapped me on the back, giving me a one-armed hug. “Don’t go all mushy on me. It’s not like I’m a good guy or anything.”

I looked at him, understanding the complexity of that statement. He’d arranged to have someone killed. That was the solid he’d done me. He was no Mother Theresa. But he understood the meaning of loyalty. He would have helped me out even if he hadn’t gotten something out of it.

I settled for, “Thank you.”

“De nada.” He started walking over to the SUV. “Now let’s get your stuff and get you and your woman on the road.”

We moved our things, a few bags of clothes plus a box of mostly kitchen stuff for Sky, a couple of bags of things for me. We didn’t have much, but that felt about right. We were seeking a fresh start, after all. I helped Sky out of the car, and she held onto me with wobbly legs. She looked pale and like she might get sick.

“Take care of yourself.” Zeke gave her shoulder a squeeze, then looked up at me. “You, too. Now get the heck out of here.”

I didn’t need to be told again. I walked Sky over to the truck and helped her up. She looked shaken and I wanted to hold her, make her feel better, but I knew the best thing would be to put everything in the rear view mirror. Keyless engine on, we pulled out, leaving behind our SUV. Zeke would have the plates switched out within the hour. The guy was a pro. We had our stuff, our clean truck, and no one on our tail.

“They got him, Sky. It’s done,” I told her as soon as we were alone in the cab. She drew her hands up over her face and folded down over her lap. I rubbed her back, pained by her muffled sobs. “It’s all over,” I tried to reassure her. Even though I knew, lingering guilt could live on a heck of a long time.

I hadn’t wanted her to hear or see anything. I’d hoped we’d get out of the warehouse before he got in. But I guessed I couldn’t fuss over details now that everything was said and done. Plus, the way it had gone down, everything got tied up real nice and neat.

I let her feel it, whatever she was feeling. I wanted to whoop and celebrate, but her emotions would have to be more complicated. She’d been with the guy for four years.

“Do you think any Skulls know we’re involved?” she asked.

“Nope.” I’d gone over all the scenarios in my head. “Worst case, he called up a Skull and said he’d seen you. But none of them will know what happened after. The Reapers won’t leave a trace.”

“You don’t think they’ll try to track me down? Find out what happened?”

“Trust me, Griller was a liability. They’re going to let this lie.” I didn’t go into the rest of the messed-up world of MC ethics. I knew the brotherhood would fight to the bloody death over a question of honor. An unfaithful wife was a low blow to their masculine code of ethics, no matter how much they might cross boundaries themselves. With Griller alive, he could mobilize others to help him inflict pain.

But dead? I felt pretty sure the Prez would be happy Griller had gone when he did. He must have known Griller caused more trouble than he saved. It was only a matter of time before something he did escalated conflict, sent the whole club spinning into a war with a rival gang. Now he could devote his resources elsewhere.

“Where are we headed?” she asked, sounding exhausted.

“I thought we could spend the night in Flagstaff. Get some sleep. Then we can talk about where to next.” We could get there around midnight, find some hotel where we could pay cash and crash.

Hand on her leg, I added, “You’re amazing, you know that? What you did today? You’re so brave.”

Tears on her face, she tried to give me a smile, but then turned and looked out the window as I drove. We were safe, free at last, the plan working exactly as we’d hoped. But it didn’t feel that way. It felt like she’d brought prison right along with her, trapping herself in a world of pain.

§

The next day, after a heavy sleep, we grabbed coffee and got on the road, driving until Albuquerque when I heard her stomach grumble. I pulled off at a diner, insisting we stop and have a proper meal. She was only going to get some fries, but I urged her toward a burger. She still seemed like she was sleepwalking.

We ate, and I ordered a slice of pie. “Try some.” I offered her some on my fork. Reluctant, she took a bite, then made a disgusted face.

“That’s from a can.”

“Nothing like Sky’s Pies,” I agreed. Slowly, I saw a smile creep into her face. “You know, I think we might need to set you up with a pie shop.”

“Jax.” She shook her head like I was talking crazy.

“Something to think about,” I insisted.

“I just want to be safe.” Sitting in the booth, she wrapped her arms around herself like she was cold. “Do you think we can be?”

“Absolutely.” It hadn’t sunk in for her yet, but no one was coming for us. It was all over.

“Where?”

I’d been thinking it over, talking about it with Liam, but I hadn’t discussed it with Sky yet. At first, it seemed like too much to assume that she’d want a future with me. As if once Griller was out of the picture, I would be, too. And then, when things heated up between us, we’d gone so fast into devising and executing our plan, we hadn’t stopped to talk about “what next.”

“I was thinking about Naugatuck.” I scratched my head, gauging her reaction.

“Where you got in the accident?” She seemed surprised.

“Yeah, you ever been?”

“No.” She said it like “of course not.” And it was true, Naugatuck was a rich people destination, like Martha’s Vineyard or the Hamptons. But I’d spent a couple summers there and one of my best friends was a local who said he had a lead on a place where we could stay. Plus, it couldn’t be more off the radar of a certain Southern California motorcycle club.

“It’s real pretty there. Right on the ocean. Kind of a small town feel. I think you’d like it.”

She nodded. “Sounds like a good place to lay low.”

“Not that we have to,” I added, agreeing but wanting to reassure her.

“Guess it’s as good a place as any,” she shrugged. Still not exactly the reaction I’d been hoping for, but it would have to do for now.

After another few hours of driving, we stopped for the night in Amarillo, Texas. She took a long, hot shower. I wanted to join her, but she still seemed a million miles away. Instead, I called Ace.

“Where you been?” he asked. I’d told him I was heading out of town, and of course he’d been the one to encourage me to do that on a permanent basis. But we’d gone about a week without contact and I rarely let that happen.

“I’m with Sky.” I decided to answer with what I could say, instead of trying to pussy-foot around what I couldn’t.

“No kidding.” He whistled with amazement. “How ‘bout that.”

“She’s left her husband.”

“How about that,” he repeated. “I always knew the two of you made quite a pair. So, are you heading somewhere together?”

“I think we’re going to Naugatuck.” I told him about Liam, how he said he had a lead on a place.

“You sound happy, Jax.”

“I am, Ace.”

“Proud of you, son. You let me know when you get there.”

Sky went right to sleep when she got out of the shower, like she couldn’t keep her eyes open for another second. “Sorry,” she mumbled as she sank down on the pillow. “So tired.”

“That’s OK.” I rubbed her back, worried about her. She seemed like she was in a deep funk.

“Love you, Jax,” she mumbled, her voice heavy with fatigue. “You’re my hero.” And she was out, her ribs rising and falling with slow, deep breaths.

Hero. Huh. I’ve never had that name applied to me. In fact, I’d spent a good long time after the accident feeling the opposite. Ian had never blamed me for his injuries, but no one had gone so far as to call me a hero that night. Ace had always believed in me, seen a better path for me than just about anyone else around me. But even Ace, with all his grandfatherly love and faith, had never said I was a hero.

But Sky? She made me feel that way. Sure, she was passed out cold and probably only twenty percent coherent when she’d said it. But it was the way she looked at me, the way she trusted me. To her, I was a hero. I had to admit, she made me feel like one.

§

It was the next day that she finally started reviving, her true, effervescent self bubbling through. At lunch in Oklahoma City, she laughed and told me a story about one of the women she used to work with. During our afternoon driving shift, she apologized.

“Sorry I’ve been so out of it. I think I’ve been in shock. I can’t believe it all actually happened.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about.”

“Thanks, I don’t want you to think I’m not grateful for your help

“Of course not”

“Or not excited to be with you. It’s just a lot to process. To think Mike’s dead.” She shook her head, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ve wanted to be free for so long. I start feeling these moments of happiness, but then I feel guilty. Like there’s blood on my hands.”

“There would have been blood on his hands if he’d gotten the chance,” I had to remind her. She did need to come to her own conclusions, but I also couldn’t sit quiet and listen to her beat herself up. “He was cruel to you, Sky. The thought that he ever laid a hand on you.” I clutched the steering wheel, rage surging through me.

“I know, Jax. I know.” She reached out and touched me, running her hand along my arm. “I know we had to do it. And we’re lucky it worked. I think it’s just going to take some time to get used to it, this reality where I’m free of him. And I’m with you.” She smiled at me, leaning her head against my shoulder.

“Is that what you want, Sky?” I made myself ask. We’d had an intense connection leading up to the show-down in the warehouse, but that had also been filled with adrenaline. She’d needed my help. I knew I wanted to be with her now more than ever, but I didn’t want to take it for granted that she felt the same way.

“More than anything.” She spoke quietly but clearly, and suddenly Springfield, Missouri couldn’t come fast enough. We’d agreed we’d stay there overnight. The faster we got across the country, the more distance we’d put between us and the pain of the past. The quicker Sky and I could move on to the good stuff.

Finally pulling off for a hotel, she made a confession. “All that waiting in that car with you was hell.”

“You mean when we were downtown waiting to see Griller?” She nodded. “Yeah, that was hard, being patient and not knowing if he’d ever show. But all that time we put in paid off in the end. It worked.”

“What I mean is, I hated sitting so close to you and not touching. I knew we had to stay focused, but you were so distracting.”

I swallowed, turned to her and said, “Hold that thought.” I paid in cash, grabbed the room key card and got us checked in in record time. Finally holding her in my arms, kissing her the way I’d wanted to, finally free of all the anxiety and obstacles, we tumbled into the hotel room.

“Naked,” I panted pulling her T-shirt off her head, unbuttoning her jeans. “I want you naked.”

“You, too.” She worked on me as well, stripping me down. I sat back onto the bed, holding her to me as she straddled my knee. “I hated sitting so close to you and not being able to do this.”

She slipped down to her knees and took my cock into her mouth, her wet heat surrounding me all at once. I clutched the sheets, growling out a swear as she sucked me in smooth, gliding up and down.

She came off, licking her lips and looking up at me with a smile as she continued stroking me with her hand. “I wanted to lean down, unzip your jeans and take you in my mouth.” She dropped her head again, circling my crown with her tongue, moaning as she sucked me in.

“Sky,” I groaned, hand to the back of her head. Of course I’d wanted her to do that, too, been distracted and hard half the time we’d sat in that SUV waiting, but I’d told myself to focus. What if we missed our chance with Mike, or worse, blew our cover while she blew me?

Stroking, licking, she looked up at me with that devilish smile, sitting tall on her knees. “Do you know how much I used to fantasize about doing this? Going down on you? I used to touch myself and think about it all the time.” She moved closer, stroking my slick shaft and bringing it between her breasts. A drop of precum formed on the head. She cooed appreciatively when she saw it, smoothing it with her thumb along my shaft, then her breasts.

I watched, transfixed, as she nestled my cock in her cleavage, pushing her breasts together, caressing it between her mounds. I started thrusting, transfixed by how erotic it looked to see my toe nestled between her large breasts.

“That feels so good,” she purred, arching into me, shoving her belly together as I pushed between them.

“Idiot, Sky.” My balls clenched and I could feel it coming, already picturing how hot it was going to look cumming all over her.

“Every time I thought about you cumming,” she panted, “it made me cum.” Her nipples stood out so stiff and pink, her breasts jiggling with my thrusts. I spurted out onto her, taking my cock into my hand and jerking it onto her belly, coating her with my seed. She shuddered, her eyes closed, mouth open as she cried out.

“You’re so hot,” I panted. She sighed, rubbing my cum into her breasts, making them glisten, marking them as mine. Grabbing her around the waist, I pulled her up onto the bed and laid her down on the mattress. Spreading her legs, I dove down, wanting to taste her, needing to drink down an orgasm. I devoured her, licking, sucking, loving listening to her cries as she shivered and built up, then gave me exactly what I wanted.

“You’re mine now,” I growled, sliding her up the mattress, her head on the pillows. I was already hard again. She had an almost magical effect on me, driving me wild. Looking into her eyes, I brought one of her wrists over her head, then the other. I pinned them down, holding her there as I brought my cock to her entrance.

“I’m going to forget you, Sky.”

“Yes,” she hissed, writhing under my grasp. Entering her felt like paradise, so tight and wet, but I went slow, savoring every inch of the push in, the friction of the pull out. She whimpered, twisting against my grip, biting her lip and looking up into my eyes. Bucking her hips into mine, she tried to drive us into a faster pace.

Watching her belly jiggle as I harassed her, I thought about her not washing them off. I always wanted her covered in a layer of my cum. I was a nasty beast of a man. I could feel her arousal build, her breathing growing faster, starting to get sweaty as she moaned.

“I’m never letting you go.” I moved faster, ramming into her as I pushed down on her wrists.

“Never let me go,” she cried, meeting my thrusts. I felt her start to contract, spasm, as her orgasm broke, and it pushed me into mine. With a roar, I buried myself to the hilt, my balls slapping against her rear as I came inside of her.

Dropping down to her side, I gathered her against me, the sheets a mess from our writhing bodies. “I’m going to fill you with my cum every day,” I told her as I kissed her.

“What about covering me with it, too?” she fake-pouted, then kissed me back.

“Oh, you like it on you as well as in you?”

“I do,” she admitted, snuggling into me. No doubt, I’d hit the jackpot.

19

Sky

We arrived in Naugatuck on the first day of April. And it wasn’t just any old April day. It had sunshine and a fresh breeze, climbing up to seventy in the mid-afternoon.

I guessed technically I’d been living near the ocean for the last four years, but I could count on one hand how often I’d been to the beach, at least over the past couple years. I’d gotten so down, so focused on escape, that I didn’t think I’d been out to it once.

But I loved the ocean, the brisk freshness of it, the wild tumbling waves and the glittering, sparkling expanse of water beyond. I could listen to the smells and sounds of the beach all day long. Naugatuck, on the North Atlantic, fascinated me with how different it was than the coast I’d always known. I’d never traveled much so maybe I was easy to impress, but the different flowers blooming, the constantly changing clouds, the greenery from all the rain, everything I saw amazed me.

Every day I was there, it felt like my heart opened more. I hadn’t realized how long I’d been clenching it closed like a fist. It had eaten away at me, living in fear. I’d blocked so much else out of my world just to survive.

Now, I felt like I noticed everything. People smiling on the street, little kids licking ice cream cones, puppies biting their leashes. Birds, from sandpipers dancing back and forth on the waves to seagulls swooping and diving. There was so much wildlife on the island, much more than I’d ever seen in California. I’d grown up in an agricultural spot of the state, with plenty of livestock, but that paled in comparison to all the wildlife, plus the incredible marine life with crabs and sea stars and snails.

Bunnies darted in and out of our yard. Jax and I watched them in the morning, cozied up together. His friend Liam had to be one of the coolest, most generous, open-hearted people I’d ever met. Liam had grown up on the island and knew everyone. He’d found us a rental dirt cheap where we could stay for two months, until peak tourist season. By then, we hoped we’d find something more permanent.

But while we had this rental, we planned on enjoying it. It had an ocean view. I didn’t know what I’d been doing with myself, so close to the ocean in Southern California but never going out and enjoying it. But I guessed that applied to a lot of things. I hadn’t really been enjoying any aspect of my life, ocean included.

Over the first two weeks on the island, Jax and I took a lot of long walks, nothing to do and nowhere to be. We strolled all over the island, exploring, sometimes re-discovering spots for him since he’d spent some time there growing up when his parents had headed there for seasonal work.

“This place is still in business!” Jax lit up like a little kid, discovering a bakery he’d loved at 10 was still open and offering the exact same cheese bread he’d once adored. We quickly became regulars, going there for coffee and pastry in the morning. Jax, of course, didn’t ever stop bragging about me and my baking skills. Before I even knew what was happening, the owner was encouraging me to bring by some of my pies.

“The crusts are the tricky part,” she admitted to me.

“But your pastries are so light and flakey!” We lost ourselves to a good 20-minute discussion on crusts in particular, and dough in general. Only when she had to excuse herself to help another customer did I remember that Jax was sitting, waiting and possibly bored out of his mind.

“Sorry.” I sat down, wondering how much time had elapsed.

“I love watching you talk. You look so happy when you talk about pies.” He really looked like he meant it, too, as if just seeing me happy made him happy. I didn’t know what to make of it. I’d never experienced that before, his kind of unselfish, generous love. I wasn’t used to it yet, but I welcomed the challenge of getting there. Though I hoped I never took it for granted. I couldn’t imagine I ever would.

Liam and his fiancé Sophie had us over for dinner a bunch of times, barbequing and introducing us to Liam’s firefighting buddies and Sophie’s dance studio partners. She used to be a big-time ballerina in New York City, which sounded incredibly glamorous to me, but when I saw how content she was with Liam and in her dance studio on the island, I couldn’t deny she seemed to have found her true calling.

“You should come to a class some time!” she encouraged me. “Do you like dancing?”

“I’ve never really tried.” Other than occasionally drinking too much and jumping up and down to a DJ at a party, dance was not something I’d thought much about. I got the impression that Sophie had grown up very differently from me, basically with a major silver spoon in her mouth. But she wasn’t stuck up. She was welcoming and kind, not snobby at all, but every now and then a detail would emerge. Like she and Liam had first met because her family owned an estate on the island. I didn’t know exactly what it took to level jump from house to estate, but it sounded like big bucks, especially on an island as expensive as Naugatuck.

Turned out her older brother was Ian. I’d heard Jax talk about him from time to time, usually fraught with guilt over his injuries in the boat accident.

“How’s your brother?” I asked Sophie one night, as she and I sat out on the porch at their place enjoying beers.

“Has Jax mentioned him?” She seemed surprised I knew about Ian.

“He has. Does he come by and visit? Or…?”

“No, he lives in Scotland.” She shut down the subject quick, asking me about my pies. I knew she was deliberately distracting me, but I was easy. Ask me about baking and I had no problem launching into a lengthy discussion on the subject.

But it did leave me wondering what was going on with that fourth friend. Jax and Liam were still obviously as close as brothers, and they talked and texted with Chase who lived down in Florida, harassing him all the time about when he and his wife Emma were going to come up and visit. But Ian, who still seemed to be on their minds all the time, was always absent.

“Do you think Ian will ever come to Naugatuck?” I asked Jax late one night. We’d cooked dinner and made love and were laying together, naked, nothing but a brief breather between rounds. My Jax was insatiable, and with him, I was, too.

“Nope.” He sighed, and I could tell the answer troubled him.

“Does anyone talk to him anymore?”

“Liam and Sophie went to visit him around the holidays, but what they saw wasn’t good. He’s walled himself off.”

“That’s so sad.”

“You worried about him?” He kissed me on my head, letting me know with his gestures as he’d told me many times, he thought I was a good person. He was always so complimentary, making me feel like I was so special when to me it was just common decency. But I didn’t exactly mind him doting on me.

“I am.”

“This time last year I would have said it didn’t look good for Ian. But now that I have you?” He swept a hand down my back, pressing me to him. “Now I know anything’s possible.”

At times over the past year I’d worried that my fixation on Jax wasn’t so much about him, but instead was about my desire to escape. I’d certainly relied on my fantasies of him to get me through the dreariness of my reality. During those long, difficult months of separation, I’d even tried to convince myself that Jax couldn’t be all I’d built him into. There was no way he was such an incredible blend of strong and sweet. No one who looked like the badass hero from an action movie could actually be so caring, considerate and thoughtful. And no way could the sex be as good as I’d imagined it would be.

Hello, reality better than the fantasy! Jax was everything I’d lain awake dreaming about and more. Every day I felt like I discovered something new about him that made me love him even more, hearing about the mischief he and his friends Liam, Chase and Ian had gotten up to as kids on the island. Learning how much he’d had to stay strong with his parents so volatile and unreliable. Seeing him lighten up more, relaxing, I couldn’t believe how much more my heart grew full for him every day.

He was already talking to a couple of friends of Liam’s about opening a bar on Naugatuck. That man had so many friends, I had to wonder, who wasn’t a friend of Liam’s?

One afternoon, we enjoyed a moment sitting out on the deck listening to the sounds of the surf. It was brisk out, with bright sunshine but a chill in the wind. A California girl like me would have felt cold, except I had Jax. He hugged me onto his lap, keeping me so warm. The man was a walking radiator.

“Just think, if I ran a bar here, no motorcycle clubs.” He sounded like a kid in a candy shop.

I had to laugh, picturing the tough crowd that used to hang out at Ace Bar. The crowd I’d married into. That all seemed so far away now, such a different life. “Nope, that is not the scene here.”

On Naugatuck, I’d seen more men in pink over the past two weeks than I had all my life. The tourists seemed to all think they were in a photo shoot for a preppy clothing brand. I’d seen women sporting tortoise shell headbands and madras plaid skorts, like they’d found an ugly tablecloth and decided to wear the thing.

But I loved it. The whole place felt like a perpetual vacation to me, a safe haven where nothing bad ever happened. Sophie had told me all about the Naugatuck historical preservation society and how they liked to keep things the same way it had been since it was a whaling town in the 1700s. Some streets were still cobblestone and the street lights looked like old fashioned gas lamps. Hydrangeas bloomed all over downtown, carefully tended, never vandalized. The dogs looked better fed and groomed than most of the people I’d known back in Cavallo.

I knew Jax and I needed to start making money sooner rather than later. We both had some cash reserves, but instead of spending it all it would be far better to invest it into something else—a place to live, a new bar, who knew, maybe even a pie shop? The nice woman who owned Jax’s favorite childhood bakery had loved the first set of pies I’d brought her. It felt like a promising start. Everything did.

“I think I’ve seen you smile more in the last two weeks than the whole past year.” Jax held me to him, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

“I’m really happy.” A simple statement, I spoke it from the heart. “I never thought I could be this happy.” I felt a little choked up, burying my head in his chest. I loved listening to his heart beat, so steady and sure.

“You deserve it, Sky. I used to see you in that retirement home making everyone else happy every day. Now it’s time for you to feel happy.”

I kissed him, because sometimes that communicated better than words how I felt. And then, quickly, kisses weren’t enough. They rarely were with Jax. I pressed against him, needing him inside me. He could light a match in me with a single glance, a tempting stroke across my skin and I’d be ready to go.

He stood, picking me up like it was no big deal, not even breaking our kiss as he carried me inside our rental house. Right next to the water, the place had a lot of windows. He set me next to one in the living room, stripping down my jeans and off my shirt like the pro he was. I moved to start undressing him as well, but he turned me around, facing the window.

“Step back into your shoes.” I shivered, not knowing exactly what he had in mind but knowing I’d like it. I slid my feet into my heeled wedge sandals, giving me a couple of extra inches. All the better to line us up. He growled in appreciation, running his hands along my rear, my thighs, my lower back.

“Put your hands up to the frame.” I positioned my hands, one on either side of the window, shivering as he pulled off my panties. He leaned against me from behind and I could feel his huge cock, hard and throbbing with heat. I pressed back into him with a long, “mmmm,” letting him know just how good he felt.

He reached around, cupping my breasts, massaging them as he whispered hot in my ear, “I’m going to forget you against this window. Are you ready?”

I whimpered in response, my “yes” a breathy exhale as I spread my legs. I wanted him to ram into me the way only he knew how, practically making me come with just the force of his first, possessive thrust.

He snapped open my bra, throwing it to the ground. Then he pushed the center of my back forward, pressing my breasts to the cold glass. My nipples pebbled, from the feel of his control as much as the cool, smooth pane pushing against them. I turned my face, resting my cheek there as well, arching my back, my legs wide apart, feet jacked up in my heels.

His impossibly thick and long cock at my entrance never ceased to make me tremble. I wanted it so much, but it was always intense, stretching me so wide. I shook with anticipation, fingers gripping the wood frame. One hand on my hip, the other grabbing my rear check, he entered me with a predatory thrust. I screamed at the assault, the feel of him pushing into me, me with long, powerful, strong strokes.

He returned his hand to the center of my back, holding me there as he forced my hips back into him, burying his cock again and again into my soaking wet pussy. Fevered as he made me, a strange calm overtook my mind. No worries, no anxiety, no wondering about the past or the future. I was completely in the moment, aware of nothing more than our bodies, the juncture where we joined, so slick and hot, the feel of his hands on me, holding me where he wanted. I could completely let go, surrender to it and I almost felt like I was floating, pleasure buoying me up as I moaned in rhythm with his thrusts. He messed me so hard I had no words, no thoughts, only desire, shivering and shuddering through me.

“You’re mine. All of you, Sky,” he growled, bringing his hand to my hair, gripping it in a fist. “Mine.”

“Yes,” I groaned spreading my thighs as far as I could manage, keeping myself upright so I could take it all, take all of his pounding. He could feel me tremble, sensing the tension in my body right before release. He pounded me, fast and sweaty, demanding and relentless.

I came so hard he had to support my body, holding me up with his hands as he came deep inside my pussy. My head fell back onto his chest as I cried out, shuddering with orgasm, feeling him pulse in me. I never wanted it to end. I never wanted him to stop. With Jax, every moment made me crave another, and another.

“I’ll never get enough of you.” He echoed my thoughts as he scooped me up and carried me into the bathroom. He turned on the shower, getting the spray hot and steamy the way we both liked it. With a mischievous grin, he told me, “Now climb in here and show me how dirty you are. I’ve got just what you need.” He held up the detachable shower nozzle and even though I’d just been soundly messed, still feeling the ebbing throbs of a stunning orgasm, my clit throbbed once again, knowing what he was capable of with that shower head. Just when I thought I’d hit a new high, Jax introduced me to the next level even higher up.

I didn’t know what I’d done in life to deserve him. But I planned on spending the rest of my days devoted to living up to the ideal he seemed to worship. Even though he made me feel like I didn’t have to do a thing. He loved me exactly as I was.

Epilogue—Jax

Liam really hooked us up on Naugatuck. Sky and I had only been there three months and already we were established and settled. He helped us find a cottage out in back of a gigantic property. It hadn’t been rented out before, but, as was Liam’s way, he knew a guy who knew a guy and in exchange for promising the elderly owner an all-inclusive remodel, she rented it out to us way below market rate.

Liam and his firefighter buddies, all of whom had other careers as carpenters and plumbers and electricians, were crawling all over the place, but we didn’t mind. We had a sweet spot with an ocean view on one of the most gorgeous islands I’d ever seen. Plus, we could weigh in with what we liked, and Sky had a lot to say about the kitchen. She knew a lot about stoves and oven ranges and even types of refrigerators. I let her do her thing, happy I’d played any part in helping her live out her dream of designing her dream kitchen. True, this was just a rental unit at the moment, but the owner had indicated there might be an opportunity to buy in the future. What a coup that would be, owning on Naugatuck Island. I might have to buy myself a bow tie and start putting on airs. Just to crack Sky up, of course.

Making her laugh, seeing her smile, that was rapidly becoming my favorite pastime. Well, OK, of course my favorite pastime was her like a ravenous beast. But that was a close second.

Third came planning my new bar. Through Liam, of course, I’d hooked up with two interested and well-funded guys wanting to go in on the joint. The way I saw it, Naugatuck needed a casual, laid-back alternative to all the wine bars and themed, upscale nightclubs. It needed a tavern, plain and simple, that served great brews and hearty food. A place to unwind and relax.

The historical society loved the concept, especially since we used the word “tavern.” That had been my idea, thank you very much. The whole island had such a historic feel, it seemed like a no-brainer. We’d do burgers and comfort food, including some local favorites like clam chowder and fish ‘n chips. I wanted the whole place to feel comfortable, like a home away from home.

“How about ‘Ye Olde Tavern’,” Ace suggested one night as I Skyped with him. A new nurse’s aide had set it up for him on his computer and he’d become a Skyping madman, ready to chat at all hours of the day and night. The time zone difference didn’t seem to register so much. I’d had to turn off the wifi connection on my phone overnight so he wouldn’t wake us up at five a.m.

“Yeah, I’ll think about it.” I cleared my throat. I wanted to get serious, tell him something I had on my mind. Only speaking my heart wasn’t always that easy.

“Spit it out, son.”

I chuckled. Ace always knew me even better than I knew myself. “With everything going so good in my life, I just want to, you know, thank you. For taking me in when I was 16. And believing in me.”

“Aw, you don’t have to thank me. I’d do it all over again.”

“I know I gave you a hard time. I was so angry.

“And I kept yapping at you about hard work, perseverance, and delayed gratification.”

I could hear him rattling all that off at me, drilling it into my head that living that way might not be that satisfying in the short term, but ultimately working hard and staying straight led to a better life. Back then, I’d rolled my eyes, but I’d listened. “I’m glad you did.”

“Well, look at you now.

“I have you to thank.”

“Be sure to call and thank me when half your wait staff quits on opening day.” He gave a hearty laugh, knowing the kinds of headaches and long hours it took to make a restaurant successful. But I loved doing it. And now I had the chance to run another place, on my own terms. “Now where is she?” he demanded.

I laughed. It wasn’t me he wanted to Skype with, anyway, it was Sky. I understood. She was much prettier to look at, and nicer to talk to, too.

“I know what we have to call Jax’s new tavern!” The woman in question entered the room, joining in the conversation. “Ace’s Place!”

“It’s got a ring to it!” Ace agreed.

“Now you’ve got to promise to come out for the grand opening.” She visited her favorite topic, trying to get Ace to come out and visit. We both wanted him to consider moving to Naugatuck. We talked up its considerable charms, but Ace always responded with a, “It snows there, doesn’t it?” So far, he wasn’t interested, but we’d keep at him.

“My friend Sophie has a new student in her senior dance class,” Sky teased him. “She’s quite the dish.” I loved how well Sky and Sophie got along. It made it so fun to hang out with Liam when the four of us could all just relax and crack up together. I’d say I missed that, but I’d never really had it. Back in Cavallo, Zeke had been my oldest friend and I knew I could trust him with my life, but he wasn’t exactly on the same path as me. Liam and Sophie? They were exactly our speed.

“Tell her to Insta-square me,” Ace teased Sky right back. “I’ll take a look and decide if I should swipe.”

“Insta-square?” Sky mouthed to me. I shook my head, letting her know she shouldn’t bother trying to sort out the nuances of social media to Ace. He was having fun mucking around with it. From what it sounded like, the man had at least heard of Tinder.

Personally, I was glad I didn’t need to bother with any of that. Not that I ever had, really. I’d never had trouble finding women to spend time with, even before I’d owned a bar.

But Sky was so much more than someone to spend time with. She was as amazing to wake up to in the morning as she was to take to bed at night. The last time Liam and I had grabbed a beer, just the two of us, he’d elbowed me.

“She’s the one, you know that, right?” he’d asked, looking at me expectantly.

I didn’t even try to play it cool. “She’s the one.” I’d known it for a long time, way before it had been anywhere near appropriate to feel that way. There had been a connection between us right from the start, with physical attraction, of course, but something so much deeper than that as well.

“So? Want to make it a double wedding?”

I nearly spit the beer out of my mouth. He and Sophie were getting married around the holidays. “Sky just got out of a really bad marriage. I don’t think now’s exactly the time to pop the question.”

“Don’t you want her to know how you feel?”

Huh. Liam had a point. I didn’t answer him then, though. We got to talking about other things, conversation turning as it often did to Ian, wondering what he was up to, what we could do to help him. I hadn’t talked to Ian in almost two years, even though I thought about him almost every day. He’d stopped answering texts, never picked up calls, and it wasn’t just with me, it was with all of us. Even if he was holed up in that crumbling castle in Scotland, I hoped he wasn’t completely alone.

Because now I knew, you couldn’t lone-wolf it through all of life. You might need to do it to get through a tough time, but, ultimately, it would never make you happy. People weren’t meant to live in isolation. Now that I’d found Sky and felt what it was like to have a true partner, I knew I never wanted to let her go. Liam’s question stayed with me—didn’t I want to tell her how I felt? I didn’t want to rush her into anything. But I wondered if I could talk about the future, tell her what I hoped for between us, while also letting her know that I’d wait as long as it took.

A couple days before Liam’s huge Fourth of July party, I took Sky out for a nice dinner. Again, Liam knew a guy who worked at a swanky waterfront place where it was dang hard to get a table. But drop Liam’s name and suddenly we had ourselves a seven o’clock reservation and—look—no charge for the second entrée!

We took a stroll afterward, hand in hand. She had on a pretty little colorful sundress, her hair curling in the ocean air. Undeniably, she had more bounce in her step, more pink in her cheeks day after day.

“You like it on Naugatuck?” I asked, wrapping my hand around her waist.

“It’s like a theme park, it’s so pretty!” She laughed, gesturing around the picturesque street. “Does anyone even litter on this island?”

“I think if they do they’re immediately air-lifted off,” I joked, but then asked, more seriously, “So, you can see yourself living here? For a while?”

“Absolutely.” She reached up and kissed me. “And maybe take over for Maple when she retires.” Fingers crossed, she looked up, excited. The woman who owned my favorite bakery on the island had taken a liking not just to Sky’s baking, but to Sky, herself. Sky had started working for her and, more and more as the days passed, she’d picked up on Maple’s desire to pass the baton on the entire business.

But instead of wanting to discuss that exciting development, Sky turned her attention back to me, concerned about how I was doing. She was as unselfish as people came. “Is it ever strange for you? Being back here where you all nearly died out on that boat? I don’t mean to bring up such a bad memory. But every now and then, I wonder.”

“You know, that was the worst night of my life, don’t get me wrong. But that night didn’t happen because this is a bad place. It happened because I was a stupid 14-year-old.”

“And the other guys, too.” She stuck up for me, like she always did. I didn’t mind having her in my corner.

“Sure, all of us were stupid, no question. Heading out right before it got dark, not knowing how to operate the boat, no idea about the forecast. I still can’t believe we did it.”

“But you’re wiser now.” She returned me to the present, wrapping her hand around my bicep, smiling up at me.

“A little,” I grudgingly agreed.

“And it’s not strange for you, being back?”

“Not at all. I could see myself settling down here. Having a family. Could you?”

She pinked up, closing her eyes, pressing herself against my chest in a hug. “Yes,” she exhaled, seeming to feel the answer through her whole body.

I took her hand and we walked back to the truck, lost in our own thoughts which I had a feeling were traveling along the same tracks. I could see the future stretching out before us in a way I never could before. I wanted to rush into it, leap and grab it while it stood out so clear. But that wasn’t the way time worked. You had to wait for it to unfold. And with Sky, I had to trust that time together was always a good thing.

Opening the truck, I welcomed her into the back seat. “After you.”

She gave me a questioning look, but climbed into the back. She probably knew I was up to no good. But what she’d also learned by now was how much she liked it when I was.

“I haven’t had dessert yet.” I grinned wickedly, laying her down on the seat and sliding off her panties.

“Jax, here?” We were in a parking lot, but our windows were tinted. If she didn’t scream, we could probably get away with it.

“You’re going to have to keep quiet.” I grinned again, knowing how hard it was for her to do that when I went down on her. I liked making it as difficult as possible. Having her panting and writhing beneath me, I wanted to drag it out, make her squirm and beg. There was nothing I liked more than seeing her crazed with desire, her eyes closed, her lips open with pants and moans, fingers digging into whatever she could find.

She got so wet for me and tasted so good, I took my time feasting on her. Stopping with my mouth inches away, I looked up so I could see her face as I played with her with my fingers.

“Jax, please,” she begged, having drawn so close yet again to cumming. But I’d stopped before I let her.

“I’ll let you cum,” I promised, coating my fingers in her slick arousal.

She moaned, biting her lip, trying to stifle it and keep things quiet. Watching her face, I slid a finger to the tight ring of her jerk. Her eyes flew open wide and she picked up her head to look at me. “I want to finger bother your rear,” I whispered, sliding my thick digit past her entrance.

Tilting her head back again, she cried out, panting and quivering as she took me in. Slowly thrusting, working my finger into her, I saw how much she liked it. Squirming, bucking her hips in rhythm with my movements, I could tell she wasn’t going to be able to last much longer.

I dipped my mouth yet again to her clit, giving it a long, slow lick as I harassed her rear. “Yes!” She pushed her hips down into my face, into my finger. I sucked and bit, licking and wanting to devour every last shudder of her orgasm.

Holding her there in my truck, I realized that with Sky, I wasn’t any good at waiting. I hadn’t even been able to wait to get her back to the house. She made me crazy, impatient, and I’d had to wait far too long before I had her as my own. Someday soon, I wasn’t going to wait any more to tell her how deeply I felt about her, and what I hoped for our future together.

Epilogue—Sky

Fourth of July! I had the day off. Jax’s bar wasn’t open yet, so both of us were free. He and his partners had picked a location right in the center of downtown, but the place needed some updating which would take a couple of months.

That night, Liam was holding his legendary Fourth of July party. Jax warned me that I should prepare myself for seeing celebrities. I’d almost gotten used to it, turning my head and spotting some famous actress or another. Naugatuck tended to attract an older crowd, not the twenty-somethings ready to club all night. But I was right smack in the middle of my twenties and had no interest in that myself, so the island suited me just fine.

Even as I settled into domestic tranquility with Jax, I felt younger than ever. My heart felt so light. I could still remember the sadness I’d felt when I’d turned 25, and the promise I’d made myself. In a few months I’d be 26 and it looked like I was well set up to make good on that promise. I had more love in my life than I knew what to do with.

I was even dressing more fun. Goodbye scrubs and sneakers, hello sundresses and heels. It felt fun to play around. Jax made me feel so sexy, and I found myself wearing pinks and polka dots or silly prints that made me smile.

When I’d Skyped with my mom, she’d been shocked. “Is that you, Sky?” she’d asked, pretending to squint and shield herself from all my bright colors.

I didn’t get into all the details, I just told her that I’d left Griller.

“Thank goodness,” she’d said, and I had to agree. I urged her to come out and visit. She said she might. She’d always had a soft spot for Naugatuck.

I started dancing, too, at Sophie’s studio. She had a hip-hop class that a friend of hers taught. I could not have been worse. I wasn’t being modest, I really did not know what I was doing. Twerking did not come naturally to me. But I was having a blast, every Tuesday night, shaking my booty and laughing with a whole group of women in their twenties, thirties and forties.

At the party tonight Jax was excited for me to meet Chase and Emma. He wanted me to be able to put another piece into the puzzle, getting to know another of his oldest friends. Apparently Chase had been the first of them to go. “The first domino to fall,” I think he’d put it. Then Liam, then Jax had coupled up. What was the world coming to? Before long, Ian would be happily married, too, and then what would any of them do with any residual angst? They’d have to donate it to a charity, maybe one that provided surplus angst to emo bands in need.

But as much as I did look around and feel like I had to pinch myself my life was turning out so rosy, some nights I still woke up frightened, heart pounding with anxiety over some dream about Mike. Every now and then a loud noise would startle me more than it should have, and I’d realize, I was still remembering how he used to smash and crash around. Living with someone explosive and violent had shaken me to the core. I guessed it was some sort of PTSD.

One afternoon last week, on a whim, I’d called up the Cavallo Canyon Retirement Community and asked for Maria.

“It’s Sky,” I told her, “Sky Cabrillo.”

“Sky! How are you? Are you all right? It’s been months!”

“Hi, yes, I’m good.”

“I was so worried, when you just quit and never came back. You didn’t answer the couple times I called you.”

“I’m so sorry. I was in a bad spot. But I wanted to call and let you know—I got away.”

“You got away?” Her voice dropped down lower. “From your husband?”

“I got away from him.” My eyes filled with tears, my hand shaking as I remembered all my fears, that impossibly trapped feeling I’d had for so long. “And I never let you know, but I wanted to thank you. For being my friend. And encouraging me even when I didn’t want to hear it.”

“Oh, honey.” Now I could tell she was crying, too. “Oh, sweetie. You’re safe?”

“I’m safe,” I assured her, really feeling it in my bones.

“I’m so happy for you. Are you still living in Cavallo?”

“No, not even close. So I won’t be around. But I wanted to call and say thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me. But I’m so happy to hear from you. You enjoy your life, Sky, you hear me?”

I promised her I would. Every day, I could feel my confidence growing, my voice getting stronger. Just last Monday, I’d presented Maple with my ideas for the future of the bakery. A business plan, as Jax called it. He’d helped me put it together and listened while I practiced talking about it, but the ideas were all mine. And they were good ones.

“All fresh local ingredients,” I’d told her, knowing how attached she was to her frozen fruits. And we could still freeze our perishable berries, but we should source them from local farms, first. “It’ll cost more, but the people on Naugatuck will pay.” I’d done the math, too, again with Jax’s help, but I understood it well enough. We’d spend more per pie, but charge more, too, making it up in the end.

Maple had pushed back some and said she needed some time to think things through, but ultimately she’d loved my ideas. She’d agreed to apprentice me in the business over the next year. Then, she wanted to sell the whole shop to me. She’d been running it for 25 years and she wanted to retire, but she’d hesitated to do it because she didn’t want to see all her hard work go away. She’d built up an amazing reputation for her baked goods. But it turned out that in me she saw a way to transition instead of end her legacy.

I couldn’t believe my dreams were coming true. I’d always wanted to own and operate my own bakery, and here one was being handed to me. Only Jax was always quick to remind me, it hadn’t just landed on my head.

“You’ve worked hard to create this opportunity,” he told me. It still felt like a gift, but I was more than happy to take it.

I felt more confident with Jax, too. I’d always felt attraction with him, seen how he’d looked at me, but I’d felt so crappy I hadn’t fully believed he wanted me. I’d assumed my feelings for him were stronger than his for me. He’d loomed larger than life; how could simple, wallflower me rock his world?

But as the weeks turned into months together, I believed it more and more. I did rock his world. And it was a lot of fun to do it.

On the morning of July Fourth, Jax was sitting on the couch working something or other out on his laptop. It probably had something to do with the bar, but he was just going to have to finish it another time. I’d already taken off my panties underneath my dress. I straddled his leg, giving him a look that let him know business time was over. Playtime had begun. Happy to call it quits, he set aside his laptop and wrapped his hands around my waist.

“Remember that day last summer when you waited for me after my shift?” I asked. He nodded, his eyes already looking dazed with lust as he watched me grind on him. “Remember how I climbed out of your truck and told you to leave me alone?” I unzipped his jeans, slid down his briefs and wrapped my hand around his cock. “You know what I wanted to do instead?”

He shook his head, looking at me like I was the most fascinating show he’d ever seen. Up on my knees, I brought his shaft to my entrance. “I wanted to do this.” I sank down onto him, taking him in to the hilt as I leaned back, gripping his shoulders.

“Idiot yes.” He grabbed me around the hips, matching my rhythm with his thrusts, both of us grinding against each other exactly the way we’d wanted to last summer. I was through delaying gratification, denying myself pleasure. Spreading my palms against Jax’s huge, muscular chest, I leaned down and licked his neck, bit his earlobe, rolling my hips as we both drove toward climax.

He pulled my top up over my head, then pushed the cups of my bra down so my breasts were exposed. Pinching my nipples, he looked me in the eye. “Show me how you would have cum for me.”

Crying out, I bucked down on him, cumming on his cock with abandon, grinding and moaning as he tweaked my tips. He shot up into me, cumming hot and hard, making me scream all over again at the feel of his release.

Somehow the rest of the morning passed in much the same way, and by the time we actually looked at a clock it was nearly time to go. Scrambling around, dashing into the shower, shoving our feet into shoes, we managed to get ourselves over to Liam’s and Sophie’s around three o’clock. We brought burgers and sausages to grill, beers to drink, and four pies I’d baked for the occasion. Most guests wouldn’t be arriving until around four, but Chase, Liam and Jax wanted some time with just the six of us.

The guys were like colts together, joking around, ribbing each other, brimming with energy over being together again. Emma was so pretty and together she and Chase looked like they could kick my rear into shape.

“How’s the center?” Sophie asked her, and I learned how Emma and Chase had opened a recreation and sports center down in Florida, mostly serving kids and seniors. She was a physical therapist and runner, whereas Chase had won himself a bundle of gold medals swimming in previous Olympics. I must look all soft and squishy in comparison, I realized, but they didn’t make me feel that way. They were open and kind, excited to meet me. But standing next to such perfectly chiseled specimens was a bit intimidating.

“You didn’t tell me they were so fit,” I whispered to Jax as we stepped outside for a moment.

“Are you afraid they’re going to make you do burpees?” he teased, giving me another beer.

“Yes, I am,” I laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Chase asked as he and Emma joined us out on the deck.

“Nothing!” I asserted at the same time as Jax said,

“She’s afraid you’re going to make her do burpees.”

“Jax!” I called out, hitting his arm, but Chase and Emma burst out laughing.

“He might,” Emma joked and Chase wrapped an arm around her, giving her a look. “He’s very intense.”

“Who’s intense?” Liam asked, joining the group, holding Sophie’s hand.

“The Olympian.” Jax tipped his beer bottle over at Chase.

“Chevy!” Liam called out, giving him a high five.

“Chevy Chase,” Jax whispered to me, explaining the nickname. “When we were 12 we watched Caddyshack about a thousand times.”

“Classic movie,” I had to agree.

“I’m so happy to have all of you here!” Liam looked around the circle, the host with the most. “You guys are like brothers to me. I can’t believe you’ve found women to put up with you.” Jax balled up a napkin and threw it at him, hitting him squarely in the shoulder.

“But seriously, here’s a toast.” He raised his beer bottle and we all followed suit. “To all of you!”

“And especially us women who put up with you,” Emma added.

“And to Ian,” Jax added, and the mood sobered instantly. “Wish he were here with us right now.”

“To Ian,” several echoed as we all clinked bottles.

We helped Liam and Sophie set up, with extra chairs and tables and ice buckets all over. It looked like they had enough food and alcohol to satisfy a couple of professional football teams.

“Let me steal you away for a second.” Jax pulled me down a path, climbing down to the sand where the waves pounded along the beach.

“You sure?” I looked back up, feeling a little guilty. They still had a lot to do to get ready.

“I’m sure.” Something in the way he looked at me made me realize he wasn’t just talking about the party.

“Sky, I’m going to give you time. All the time you need.” He looked down into my eyes. “But I want you to know, I’m all in.”

I smiled, sort-of knowing what he was saying but not exactly. “I love you, Jax.”

“I love you too, Sky. And not in the ‘this is great while it lasts kind of way.’ I know this might sound crazy, we’ve only actually been together for only a few months now.”

“But we’ve known each other much longer.” He didn’t have to convince me. I already knew how I felt about him.

“I figure…” He brought his hand up to his head, rubbing it as he paused in thought. I brought my hand up there, too, touching him the way I’d wanted to so many times. He smiled and kissed me. “I figure, I’ll propose to you at Christmas. That’ll give you some time. And you can pick out the ring.”

I laughed with joy, throwing my arms around his neck. “I can already tell you my answer.” We kissed, reveling in having found each other.

“I want to wait to ask you, give you some more time, but I couldn’t wait to tell you I was going to ask you. I know what I want. And it’s you.”

“I’m glad you’re so impatient.” We kissed some more, leaning against the surface of a rock that waves had smoothed over time.

“So are we engaged to be engaged?” Jax smiled, finger under my chin as he gazed down at me as if he couldn’t believe how lucky he was.

“Yes, we are,” I smiled. Remembering our chaperoned walks, all the time we’d spent getting to know each other, I guessed in a way it made sense. “We’re so old fashioned.”

“I don’t think anyone has called me that before.” I could see the tip of a tattoo peeking out of the neck of his T-shirt.

“Well, whatever you are, don’t change a thing.” I reached up and kissed him again, showing him exactly how I felt.

THE END

Thank you!

Thank you so much for reading All of You! I hope you loved every page! It’s such fun sharing the story of Jax and Sky with you.

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Want more of Jax’s friends? Check out Chase’s story, In Deep, or Liam’s story, All of Me. And keep an eye out for All I Need, the fourth and final All In book with dark and mysterious Ian, out July 2017. Every book with these friends is a standalone and can be read in any order.

In Deep (Chase & Emma)

Chase is an Olympic swimmer going for gold. Focused, driven, intense.

Emma is a blogger going for the scoop, and she has the perfect in. She’s gotten herself hired as his physical therapist. With all that intimate time together, the secrets from his past don’t stand a chance.

And neither does she.

Click here to buy In Deep

All of Me (Liam & Sophie)

Seven years is supposed to change the way you feel.

Sophie’s not supposed to still dream about the way Liam touched her or the way they moved together. When she heads back to Naugatuck Island, she assumes Liam doesn’t even live there any more. Whatever he once felt, it has to have grown cold by now.

But Liam’s a firefighter. He knows better than anyone, never underestimate the power of a blaze. Those embers may appear cold, but nothing is ever as it seems.

Those embers? They're just waiting to burst into flames.

Click here to buy All of Me

All I Need (Ian & Annie), Out July 2017

Dark, brooding and trapped in a world of pain, Ian drinks his days away in a crumbling castle on the coast of Scotland. But when Annie’s hired as caretaker, she has no tolerance for a rich boy feeling sorry for himself. Even if Ian happens to be devastatingly gorgeous and intriguing. Even if their back-and-forth starts to feel a lot like foreplay. Annie’s determined to keep things all business, no matter how much Ian starts to change or how wildly tempted she begins to feel by his promises of dark, decadent pleasures.

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About the Author

Callie Harper writes hot, fun, page-turning romances. She is powered by coffee, wickedly sexy bad boys, and all things funny, intentional or otherwise. Born on the East Coast where she learned the joys of fast-paced sarcastic banter, she and her family are now kickin’ it in the West Coast sunshine. On any given day there’s a good chance you’ll find Callie outdoors enjoying the gorgeous Bay Area, but if she’s indoors she’ll likely be reading, writing or eating, preferably all at once.

Acknowledgments

Thank you so much for reading!

I’m so deeply grateful to my family. My husband and children, you mean the world to me and not a day goes by that I don’t feel deeply awed by the love in my life. Thank you for all the support, the beautiful moments big and small, and, of course, for all of the laughter!

Linda Russell at Sassy Savvy Fabulous PR, thank you much for your partnership. I’m so happy I’m able to talk everything over with you, get your feedback on ideas, and learn from your knowledge. I appreciate working with you!

Sophie my lovely PA and blogger, I’m so happy to have met you so early in my writing career! What a gift! I’m deeply grateful to you for helping keep the Callie Harper ball rolling. Your Beta reads of my books and feedback on blurbs are always terrifyingly spot on. Thank you so much for your advice and support.

Perfect Pear Creative, you are so talented and creative. I get compliments all the time on the book covers you create. Thank you for helping bring my characters to life.

A huge thank you to Candy and the team at Help Me Edit for proofreading. I so appreciate how quickly and thoroughly you read my work. And Jenny, Nancy, Jacquie, Vicki and Alissa, thank you for Beta reading! Your feedback helped to vastly improve the book. I’m grateful to you each for taking the time.

Thanks to all at Give Me Books for helping get the word out. Michelle, graphics guru extraordinaire, thank you for your patience, persistence and creativity.

Special shout out to all my peeps in my FB group Callie’s Corner!! You all make it so much fun to share my writing.

I’m so grateful to all of the wonderful bloggers who’ve invited me to do takeovers, shared their reviews of my ARCs, posted freebies and generally helped spread the Callie Harper word. Thank you for sharing your time, blog followers and support!

Sending out much love to the fantastic, entertaining writers I adore reading.

And last but definitely not least, I have so much love for all of the amazing book lovers out there! I love your messages, emails and posts. Hearing from you makes my day! Thank you for reading my books. I look forward to bringing you many more entertaining reads in the future!